Street Savoir Ware

A Wanted Man

2012-01-15T12:01:00.000-08:00

Dear Wyatt Earp
I don't want to be bad
All I want to be
Is a wanted man

Hair...

2011-11-20T05:38:00.000-08:00

Some inspirational songs from classic musicals:

"Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street" by Stephen Sondheim

"Hair": Book and lyrics by James Rado and Gerome Ragni, music by Galt MacDermot.

Both Sides Now

2011-08-14T12:02:00.000-07:00

Ok, first post in a while... back to writing --- this is a classic. Again, something to aspire towards.

Oh How Will You Find Your Way?

2010-12-04T09:47:00.000-08:00

I really liked this movie, and blog readers know I'm a fan of Elfman. One of the critiques I read about this film was that it was not true to the book. To that, I reply, well, obviously... have you read the book? I still can't believe they push "Alice" as reading for elementary schoolers at the bookstore. Any movie that is both a tad bit odd and about self-discovery will almost inevitably appeal to me. And you know how I like these sort of epic songs... :-P

Y' know I love y' (But do y' know how much?)

2010-11-14T13:24:00.000-08:00

Y' know I love y'
(But do y' know how much?)

[intro]

Y’ know I love ya’
But do y’ know how much?

[music]

More than a little bit
More than a simple crush

[music]

I love y’ more
Than my ole’ pick up truck

[music]

And you know how I care for that truck
So can I get an “Awwwww shucks”

[music--- following lyrics with greater emphasis]

Y’ know I love y’
But do y’ know how much?

[music]

More than a billionaire
Loves a billion bucks

[music]

You know I wouldn’t trade you
For a trillion bucks

[music]

That’s cause I love y’
But did you know that much?

[music]

I’d rather be with you
Than be on the moon

[music]

I’d rather be with you
Than be a great tycoon

[music]

I’d rather be with you
Than be a raccoon

[music]

Because I know you’d laugh
At such a loony tune

[music]

Our love
Numerically
Would be infinite

[music]

And
Geometrically
Two joined vertices

[music]

You ask me why
All I knows they rhyme

[music]

Y’ know I love y’
I chime that all the time

[music]

Y’ know I love y’
But do y’ know how much?

[music]

More than infinite
More than a billion bucks

[music]

More than all bunnies
Love to pluck
(their eyelashes of course)

[music}

Y’ know I love y’
But did y’ know that much?

{music]

It’s ‘cause I love y’
I love y’ so much

[music]

You’re so much more
Than any simple crush

[music]

You’re my mornin’ sunshine
And my evenin’ rush

[music]

With you in my life
Heck, life is plush.

[music]

Y’ know I love y’
But did y’ know this much?

[music]

More than Daisy Duck
Loves her Donald Duck

[music]

More than a Red Sox fan
Loves to scream
“Yankees suck”

[music]

Y’ know I love y’
Ready for the “I love y’” chorus?

[music]

I love y’, Love y’, Love’ y’, Love y’
Like a trillion bucks

[music]

I Love y’, Love y’, Love y’, Love y’
Like my pick up truck

[music]

I Love y’, Love y’, Love y’, Love y’
Like a girl loves a nip and tuck

[music]

But even more than all that
See? That’s the crux

[music]

You erase my ughs
With your big bear hugs

[music]

You are my teddy bear
And my favorite pin-up

[music]

And if at the end
I had to round it all up

[music]

I’d say I love you
As you’re my lady luck

[music]

More than a fitness freak
Loves to do push ups

[music]

More than all bunnies
Love to pluck
(Their eyelashes)

[music]

That’s it…
That’s all…
So again to sum it up

[music]

Y’ know I love y’
That’s “what’s up”.

[music]

[end]

Code Name Poop

2010-11-07T11:34:00.000-08:00

New rule: I'm not apologizing to anyone until Christmas. So I hope you enjoy this song!!! ;-P

Code Name Poop

Who’s on my mind?
Who’s on my mind?
Someone stinky
Watch your behind!

Who’s that I smell?
Who’s that I smell?
Someone pungent
Goin’ down the well!

What is her name?
What is her name?
Pull out a stool
And I’ll show you her name

What is that name?
Let me explain...
Lend me thy ear
But look to thy rear. ..

[music]

Code name poop!
(Here you go here’s another scoop)

Code name poop!
(Here you go here’s another scoop)

Code name poop!
(Here you go here’s another scoop!)

Code name poop!

If I told you
What she means to me
You might say me a wee bit mean

If I told you
What I think of she
You might call me a little ornery

If I told you
How she smells to me
It’d be fair to say my mouth’s potty

But if I told you
What she did to me
You might join me in this great reprise…

[music]

For code name poop!
(Here you go here’s another scoop!)

Code name poop!
(Here you go here’s another scoop!)

Code name poop!
(Here you go here’s another scoop!)

Code name poop!
(Here you go here’s another scoop!)

As no song is more logical
Than of our femme scatological

This girl has the nom de plume
Of what you’d find in a rank bathroom

So go ahead and turn your nose aside
To avoid her nose-icide

Cause you know that noxious smell
Is a product of the ex from hell…

Phhhhheeeeeeeeeeewwwwww.

She’s code name poop!
(Here you go here’s another scoop)

Code name poop!
(Here you go here’s another scoop!)

Code name poop!
(Here you go here’s another scoop!)

Code name poop!
(Here you go here’s another scoop!)

She is the species
Of every feces!
She is the girl
That deserves this reprise
She is the species
Of every feces!
She is the girl
That deserves this reprise!

For this bird
Had a nice behind
And we all know what it left behind
Was a turd
Of the most sordid kind
The sort of turd
To make one lose one mind…

And here I am
The most jealous kind
Cause she fell in love
With a wookie’s pine
And though marriage
Weren’t a thought of mine
I say she’s shit
And that’s being kind

(music)

Code name poop!
(Here you go here’s another scoop)
Code name poop!
(Here you go here’s another scoop)
Code name poop!
(Here you go here’s another scoop)
Code name poop!

(music)

So you say I’m a misogynist?
You never met her
Do you get my gist?

So you say I’m a misogynist?
You never met her
Do you get my gist?

So you say I’m a misogynist?
You never met her
Do you get my gist?

So you say I’m a misogynist?
You never met her
And she’s worse than pissssssssss

[music]

Code name poop
(Here you go here’s another scoop!)

Code name poop
(Here you go here’s another scoop!)

Code name poop
(Here you go here’s another scoop!)

Code name poop
(Here you go here’s another scoop!)

She is the species
Of every feces
She is the girl
That deserves this reprise
She is the species
Of every feces
She is the girl
That deserves this reprise

As the only name that’s logical
Is of le femme scatological
‘Cause you see her nom de plume
Is a product of the rank bathroom
So go ahead and roll your eyes aside
But don’t dare open those nostrils wide
For I gave you the inside scoop
On the femme whose name is
Code name pooooop

Code named poop
(Here you go here’s another scoop)

Code named poop
(Here you go here’s another scoop)

Code named poop
(Here you go here’s another scoop)

Code named poop

Still think I’m a misogynist?
Perhaps you’re right

But I don't give a shit

Do you get my gist?

(End)

Happy Birthday, Blue Eyes!!!

2010-10-20T18:37:00.000-07:00

As many of you may have guessed through some of my songs on this blog, I can be moody sometimes. I oftentimes write about things that have meaning to me. Sometimes I just write silly rhymes that are catchy and probably lucrative. But mostly, if you get anything from this blog, it’s that I really believe that love is the most important thing in life (and beyond if there is such a place). Whenever I am blue, (as in feeling down) which happens sometimes, I will almost always think of my sisters… though if they ever read this, I think of them often when I am happy too. Anyway, my sisters are two people who I know with complete confidence love me no matter what and it is impossible to emphasize just how important that is to me. If you ever find a person like that, or perhaps I am a person like that --- just enjoy it. Really, truly, enjoy it.

The song below is a bit different than the typical angst-ballads I have been writing recently. This one was inspired a while ago when I was sitting by my lonesome on an airplane and thinking of my sisters. One way to identify the three of us is that we each have different colored eyes: one sister has brown, the other blue, and I have hazel eyes. So I thought to myself… Blue eyes… you’re beautiful… and after a few subsequent thoughts like that… and a few months… this song was born.

Today is my Blue Eyes’s birthday --- HAPPY BIRTHDAY Blue Eyes!!! If she heard this song on the radio she probably wouldn’t like it much, because it’s kind of an oldie… slow and melodic like an ole’ Frank Sinatra or Cole Porter song… But if she knew that she inspired it… she’d probably down a glass of wine in my honor. I love her so much. My sisters bring me smiles, happiness--- to me they define the whole point of life. Happy Birthday, Wonderful!

-Bro

Blue eyes

[musical intro]

Blue eyes, you’re beautiful
As beautiful as the full moon aglow
As beautiful as all the stars I know
Blue eyes, you’re beautiful

What’s that in your hair?
A butterfly pin flying through your hair
The many soft things that we softly share
Blue eyes, you’re beautiful

[music builds]

For whenever I am blue
Blue eyes I think of you
With your laughter and your smiles
You change my mind

For when it’s as dark as night
As the sun you make it light
With your comfort and your warmth
My sky turns blue

‘Cause when I look to that sky
Blue eyes you’re all I find
A million trillion stars in bind
You’re on my mind

For what else a guy to do
When his heart is feelin’ blue
You are the best, the greatest
And yes… I love you, blue
(Yes I do)

[music]

Blue eyes, you’re beautiful
As beautiful as the full moon aglow
As beautiful as all the stars I know
Blue eyes,
I love you,
Blue…

[music – end]

Thank you God...

2010-10-10T10:07:00.000-07:00

Another one of my wonderful temper-tantrums converted into music. The chorus is classic and something just about everyone can probably relate to. Have a great holiday!!!

:-P

-------

Thank you God (for the ones that got away!)

Sixteen hours in a day
Make it twenty when you dream her way
Endless days become endless nights
When it’s close to three
And still on that fight
Who are you?
What did you say?
Some more rhetorical
Q and A
The longer it goes
The more it stays the same
Until one day she’s left
Then later wow, how lame…

Because I’m older now
And all I’ve gotta say
Is Thank you God!
For the ones that
Got away!

Ohohhohhh ohhohohhhh
Yeahh yea Yeahhhh!

[music]

Ohhohh ohhhh ohhohhohh
Helllll yeah!

[music]

Dropped me a note
Dropped me a line
Did what she did
Until my thoughts weren’t mine
Introduced me to the love of my life
Reality
A second hand of the night
There were good times
Can’t say a lie
Lying, Lying,
Well, by and by,
On the subway I saw her face
A little tension, then a lot of space
Do I love her?
Well, who can say
All I know
Is get the hell away
Get the hell away
Oh get the hell away
You crazy bitch
Get the hell away!

Because I’m older now
And all I gotta say
Is thank you God
For the ones that got away!!!

Ohohhohhh bpbopbpop ohho bpbopbp
Ohohhhh

[music]

Ohhohh ohhhh ohhohhohh
Helllll yeah!

[music]

Sympathy
Do not have it for me
This is my symphony
Of what love did to me
Was it one
D’ twat
Or two
D’ twat
Yes, deux d’twats
Of the love voila
Fool me once
Well, shame on you
Fool me again
By George, it’s a bush!
At the time
I thought it rather hot
But in retrospect
The bloody love robot

Addicted dick, emotional wreck
So very slick when I paid the check
Enough to speak of she who wreaks
To be sleepless on her bloody fantasy
Cocaine it’s plain
And heroine too
By George, it’s girls
Who undo the screws
But now I’m stronger
Like a hurricane
Writing a song
To blow away those pains

It’s enough, in retrospect
To make me sick
But at least I’m now
Not an addicted dick

Because I’m older now…
And all I gotta say
Is thank you God
For the ones that got away!

Ohhh Ohhh ah ah ah ah
Ohhh Ohhh ah ah ah ah
Yeah Yeah

[music]

Ohhh Ohhh ah ah ah ah
Ohhh Ohhh ah ah ah ah
Yeah Yeah

[music]

I’m older so I start to realize
That true love
Ain’t found in someone’s eyes
Fickle tears they only paralyze
It’s that “lovin” tongue
For false idol eyes
Religious fervor
Do you know that prize?
Some heaven waits
When you see the light
What’s that answer
What is true love?
I know what it ain’t
Through someone else’s eyes…

Because I’m older now
And all I gotta say
Is thank you, God

[music]

Oh thank you God

[music]

Oh thank you God

[music]

Yes, thank you Loooooorrrrrrrd…

For those two…
Insert expletives

[music]

That got away!

[music--- end]

Kissed by a Dramatist!

2010-09-26T11:43:00.000-07:00

This one is pretty darn great. Female voice with intensity (like Roger Moore). I guess it could be written for a dude's voice, but what would be the point in that? :-P

Kissed by a Dramatist!

Come and save me
Protect my honor
Rescue me from my
Evil step mother!

I need a hero
I need a fighter
I need you by my side
When it’s gettin’ hot!

No forget-me-nots
I need a Lancelot!
Someone who can bring
A modern Camelot!

I need you to be
More than reality!
I need you to be
My bed-time fantasy…

‘Cause you’ve been
Yeah, you’ve been
So now you’re innnnnnn….

Kissed by a dramatist!
(Kissed by a dramatist!)
Kissed by a dramatist
(Kissed by a dramatist!)
Kissed by a dramatist
(Kissed by a dramatist!)
Kissed by a dramatist…
(tis…. tis…. tis… tis…. tis… tis… tis… tis…)

There’s one true destiny
And that is you and me
Intertwined in fate
For all eternity!

For when I’m in your arms
I have to believe
That even when you die
You will never leave!

‘Cause you’re my hero
From every fable
You hold me close
Like Clark Gable!

And in your eyes, I
I know my prize
Is a man whom Darcy
Would idolize

Cause, you’ve been
Yeah, you’ve been
So now we’re in…

Kissed by a dramatist
(Kissed by a dramatist!)
Kissed by a dramatist
(Kissed by a dramatist!)
Kissed by a dramatist)
(Kissed by a dramatist!)
Kissed by a dramatist
(Tis tis tis tis tis tis tis tis)

You’re my Jack
And… I’m your Rose
So…. when I’m captured
You sock ‘em in the nose!

Hello Batman
Hello Superman
You don’t hold a candle
To my man!

For we’re forever
And ever!
Follows me to hell
Or wherever!

John Lennon
Can you imagine this?
Eternity
Wrapped in true love’s kiss?

Ophelia
Lady of Shallot
Those feelings, yes
That water, not!

I wanna cry
And I wanna lie, but
I need I need
A man by my side!

Cause you listen,
Yeah you listen,
I am now your mission
And your sole volition!

And if you don’t want this
Do not touch these lips
For what a woman needs
Is a soul that’s lit!

‘Cause I want…
And ….I need…
So…. you better be…

[music builds...]

Kissed by a dramatist!
(Kissed by a dramatist!)
Kissed by a dramatist!
(Kissed by a dramatist!)
Kissed by a dramatist!
(Kissed by a dramatist!)

Oh… ohhhhhhhhhh

Ki-ki-ki-ki-ki-ki-ki-ki-ki-ki-ki-ki-ki-ki-ki-ki-ki- kissed!
Kissed by a dramatist!
(By a dramatist!)
Kissed by a dramatist!
(By a dramatist!)
Kissed by a dramatist!
(By a dramatist!)
Kissed by a dramatist….

Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh

Is love biology?
The body’s chemistry?
The lonely cure
Until the month strikes three?

That pricks the nerves
And steals the sleep
Gives you no choice
To neither keep nor weep

Or is it even more
Than all insanity
Perchance, that ring
For all eternity

What simple lyrics
What naivety
Up here a girl
Who wants eternity

But I know of love
And it’s not chemistry
Nor biology
Nor even liberty

For what love is
Is my reality
And so what if that happens to be
The greatest fantasy.

Cause he was
And will be
So I need you to be…

Missed by a dramatist
Kissed by a dramatist!
Missed by a dramatist
Kissed by a dramatist!
Missed by a dramatist
Kissed by a dramatist!
Missed by a dramatist
(tis tis tis tis tis tis tis)

Fantasy?
Reality?
They’re all yours
It’s up to you, you see

(oooo oooo ooo oooo ooo)

[musical flurry]

[end]

Holding out for a Hero

2010-09-26T11:38:00.001-07:00

This song/ scene seems suitable. From the film "Footloose", Bonnie Tyler performs "Holding out for a Hero" by Jim Steinman and Jim Pitchford.

Hotties with Pilates

2010-09-04T11:43:00.000-07:00

Ok, so one day at work my co-worker rhymed "hotties" and "pilates"--- I immediately told her there was a song in that... and set out to prove it. See below... this song is ridiculous and juvenile, but it's also extremely catchy (and I think rather funny). I hope you enjoy! I considered entitling it "Peyton's Wet Dream"...

FYI, the beat is fast.

:-P

Hotties with Pilates

Wake up in the evening
With a fever in my body
And a mind that’s goin’ dotty
‘Cause the reel is showin’ hotties

It’s a feeling that’s alarming
And often quite disarming
What else a guy to do
But write a song that’s sweet and charming…

[music] [music]

Look at all those bodies
On those hotties with pilates
It is futile
It is simple
I have pimples
They, butt dimples!

Welcome to my body
Just a slave to all that’s Hottie
Always asking Shakespeare’s question
To be
Or not be
Hottie!

[music]

Confidence
You know it rhymes with
Common sense…

And I have one…

Confidence
You know it rhymes with
Common sense…

And which one’s fun?

For I’m goin’ to the party
With those hotties with pilates
Gonna beat their boy toy armies
Whose Bugattis
And Ferarris…
Cannot beat what looms inside me
Like the great illuminati
Sure, they are
Summa cum laudes
But I’ll teach
Some “come” a laude!!!

(Uh uh uh uh…
uh uh uh uh…

(Some “come” a laude!!!!)

Uh uh uh uh…
Uh uh uh uh…
Ahhhh!! Ahhh! Ahhhh!})
[if it is not clear to my dear, innocent, readers--- this should be sung so it is clear he is referring to “coming” loudly—and the “uhs” should be mimicking the sound of orgasm--- though not quite actual orgasm for that would not be permitted on the radio ;-P ]

Confidence
You know it comes from
Common sex

You know that’s right…

Confidence
You know it comes from
Common sex

And this is my night!

‘Cause just look at all those bodies
On those hotties with pilates
It’s a smokin’ promenade
Of some Lady Marmelades!

Do I ask them the real question
Of “To be or not be hottie”
Or do we just go and rock our bodies
Lighting rod
Shocked in a body!

[music] (Yaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!) [music]

Electricity
It’s a sin
For you and me

Ohhh please, tonight

Electricity
It’s a sin
So let it’s synergy

Light up this night…

[music]
[music]

(uh uh uh uh-uh uh)

[music]
[music]

(could you tell me anything any more fun?)

[music] [music]

For it’s playtime for the body
To inspire literati
It’s the playtime for the body
To make our faces hottie!

It’s the playtime for the body
So let’s do dual pilates
It’s the playtime for the body
It’s what makes these lyrics dotty!

Are these lyrics really dotty?
Do you still release in potty?
I think your mind is dotty
Who couldn’t with those hotties?

I think this song is shoddy!
I think you rhymed with body!
Could I win the lottery
To be smokin’ in those hotties!

(Wooooooooo)
[music] [music]

‘Cause I’m goin’ to the party
With those hotties with pilates
I feel little
I feel stupid
‘Cause just look
You don’t need cupid!

I’m goin’ to that party
With those hotties with pilates
But the truth
Is sadly simple
I have pimples
They, butt dimples!

[music]

And if this is what it seems
Just one teenager’s wet dream
You should know that what represses
Is at its best when one undresses !

So let free those pretty tresses
And let loose with thou who addresses
You as a perfect hottie
And begin to scream “Oh Lawdy!”

(music)

Oh Lawdy! Oh Lawdy! Oh Lawwwwwwdy!

‘Cause believe it or not
This boy is a
Summa hubba hubba hubba
Lova’ lova’ lova’, lova'
When you come-a’ come-a’ come-a’
Very, very, verrrrrry
Lauuuuuuuude!

(Ohhhhh yeah)

[end]

Tara's Theme

2010-09-04T11:29:00.000-07:00

I wonder if my sister knows such a beautiful song bears her name... if only I could write such a beautiful song...

From the year 1939 by Max Steiner... if you haven't seen the film, you probably should...

The Fuel of Music

2010-08-29T10:54:00.001-07:00

Ok, enough of my rants... back to songs. In my opinion, this song is also good and has a lot of potential--- though similar in subject matter (and lyrics) to one of my recent ones--- "Infuse Your Body to the Music". I guess I have been in a dancing mood lately (though not really). Yeah, the "Yum Yum Yum" lyrics are kind of dumb--- but I think it's good to have dumb lyrics, it makes the song fun.... I hope you enjoy it; and if you don't, there's always next weekend... :-P

-------------

The Fuel of Music
[Intro of Music beat similar to heartbeat]

Step into your heartbeat
Join it to the beat
As there’s a party starting
But the moment ain’t complete
Until you let the music move you
And liberate your feet
Until you’re steppin’ to the tune
That you alone own your heartbeat…

[Transition Music]

Here is the news, kid
There’s freedom in music
That the more you lose it
The more you gain, kid
It’s a strange expression
But there’s nothin’ to it
Just move your body
With the fuel of music...

Feel the beat
And meet the heat
And taste the feast
Of freedom
(Yum Yum Yum)

Feel the beat
And meet the heat
And taste the feast
Of freedom
(Yum Yum Yum)

And then Dance! [fast paced music]
Treat each moment like it might be your last!

Yeah, Dance! [fast paced music]
Each second is yours to romance!

Get out and Dance! [fast paced music]
No last stands in the movement of dance!

Freedom in Dance! [fast paced music]
Too much fighting leads to no fighting chance!

Is there anything more core…
To our beings than the great dance floor?
Is there anything more core…
To happiness than the sweat from our pores?
Is there anything more core…
To our bodies than what these limbs are for?
Is there anything more core…
To our lives than the great dance floor!

We’re all meant to move
With the fuel of music!

(So start your engines
With that tune that moves y’)

We’re all meant to move
With the fuel of music!

(Energize your life
With that sound that moves y’)

We’re all meant to move
With the fuel of music!

(So start your engines
With that tune that moves y’)

We’re all meant to move
With the fuel of music!

(So get filled up
With that sound that fuels y')

Freedom in dance
Freedom in dance!

Each second is yours to romance!

Freedom in dance
Freedom in dance!

Treat each second like it might be your last!

Freedom in dance
Freedom in dance!

No last stands in the movement of dance!

Freedom in dance
Freedom in dance!

The music of love is in the movement of dance!

[music music]
Oh Oh--- Oh Oh--- Oh Oh- --- Oh Oh--- Oh Ohh

The fuel of music.. the fuel of music…

[music music]
Oh Oh--- Oh Oh--- Oh Oh- --- Oh Oh--- Oh Ohh

Get filled up… with the tune that moves y’

[music music]
Oh Oh--- Oh Oh--- Oh Oh- --- Oh Oh--- Oh Ohh

The fuel of music… the fuel of music…

[music music]
Oh Oh--- Oh Oh--- Oh Oh- --- Oh Oh--- Oh Ohh

Get filled up… let the music fuel y’

D-d-d-d-d-Dance, D-d-d-d-d- Dance [fast paced music]
Treat each moment like it might be your last!

D-d-d-d-d-Dance, D-d-d-d-d- Dance [fast paced music]
Each second is yours to romance!

D-d-d-d-d-Dance, D-d-d-d-d- Dance [fast paced music]
No last stands in the movement of dance!

D-d-d-d-d-Dance, D-d-d-d-d- Dance [fast paced music]
Oh yes there’s… freedom in dance!

You’re never found
Until your lost
So make a sound
At any cost!
You’re never found
Until your lost
So shake you body
At any cost!
You’re never found
Until you’re lost
So lose yourself
Or else the moment’s lost!
You’re never found
Until your lost
Get loose, kid
For there’s freedom in music!

Freedom in music
Freedom in music!

[music] [music]

Freedom in music
Freedom in music!

[music] [music]

Music’s the fuel
That will always move y’

[music] [music]

So just get lost
And let the music free y’

Feel the beat
And meet the heat
And taste the feast
Of freedom
(Yum Yum)

Feel the beat
And meet the heat
And taste the feast
Of freedom
(Yum Yum)

And Fuel with music…
[music]
Fuel with music…
[music]
Fuel with music…
[music]
[music]

Here’s the news kid… [music]

The moment’s never complete... [music]

Until you lose yourself... [music}

And what you’ll find is.. [music]

That you alone… [music]

Own your heartbeat.

[music]
[music]

(Yum Yum}

[end]

Razzle Dazzle

2010-08-28T09:27:00.000-07:00

Unfortunately, I think this is the most honest song I've ever heard, and it sums up my view of the world.

From the musical "Chicago" by Kander and Ebb. I promote it today because of 1) the "Restoring Honor" rally on the anniversary of Dr. King's march a few blocks from where I write this, 2) the joke that is all-things politics and life: see the CEO of World Wrestling Entertainment as Republican senate candidate bordering the state that just elected a Republican pin-up boy-- and just life---the more I experience, the more comic it seems, and 3) learning that Obama's cabinet has zero people with business experience at a time of economic recession-- including people like the Fed Reserve Chairman--- basically they're Harvard grads (hmmm...). They're all professors, crooks (e.g., lawyers) or former actors (e.g., congresmen). And the more I learn about the bail-out, the more criminal I think that whole thing was. If you see the film "The Other Guys", stay for the credits.

The world is led by actors, and because people love conflict/drama (it's easier than knowledge), and because it's both easier and more effective to lie with statistics than to actually create meaningful statistics, it will always be led by actors. This song makes me think especially of Glenn Beck and Sarah Palin, because they're obviously both comic and scary. We have all of this media, all of this knowledge, and yet, we will always be governed by whoever is the best in this show-biz. That sadly is the truth as I have come to experience it. I think the best any of us can manage is to be people with integrity and play this game to have a meaningful impact. That, however, is easier said then done, as the best actors/dramatists tend to be people with huge egos (see people like me), not those who you would want leading anything of importance. I think the ideal leader is one who cares about a group more than his/her personal benefit, but that the most "effective" leaders tend to be those who "act" with the primary motive of personal benefit.

That said, I think what Bill Gates is doing is fantastic, and I also want to give particular kudos to Mayor Michael Bloomberg of NYC who is not only part of the "Giving Pledge" but was one of the few leaders to give unequivocal support to building the mosque in NYC. Those acts are both selfless and courageous. I think Warren Buffett's letter as part of the "Giving Pledge" is particularly moving--- these are all people who played the game--- but are now giving back, and perhaps that's the best that anyone can do. Their donations are helping out my sister's school and will hopefully accomplish a ton of good (even after they've been filtered through the show-biz nonsense of many of these non-profits and charities).

So anyway, thanks for reading my rant... as I said, I am a dramatist, and I think people want to be "good guys", so it's not all that bad, it's just comic. For example, even the best intentioned of us have to employ "show biz", it's just that, when the whole world is this "show biz" it is very difficult to make informed decisions or ever really know the truth. Enjoy the song-- it's a great one.

-P

A Clown

2010-08-15T13:08:00.000-07:00

Okay, I'm not sure about this one... it has it's moments, but I'm not sure about it... it probably doesn't have a market, and it's definitely not nearly as good as Sondheim's "Send in the Clowns" (see post below). It's not bad though... basically, a harsh rap, balanced by a soft chorus--- the chorus is bracketed out with these things (----).

A Clown

[Starts with chorus--- think slow and soft]

--------

Did you know a clown
When he’s feeling down
Will make a frown
Yeah, he’ll sneak a frown

It’s the same with him
He too will frown
When he’s feeling down
Except his come in…

------

[Into harsh rap]

I had a bad day
So you all go away
Oh that’s right, you can’t
‘Cause you’re in my poetry

I see how it is
All up in my biz
What do you think this is
Psychoanalysis?

But that’s okay
We’ll do this anyway
What the hell’s my choice
This lonely Saturday

So here it goes
All you want to know
Instead of play by play
I’ll give blow by blow…

-----

Here you see a clown
Who is feelin’ down
‘Cause she’s not around
Yeah, she let him down

It’s an old story
And we all know how
It can get one down
His just comes in…

----

Okay then
Let’s start with
This girl I loved
Let’s call her “the bitch”

Oh stop that
Don’t say that
Try to be kind
Don’t point out she’s fat

But she is well
Ok, hell
She is pretty
Fat like a prize hen

With those brown eyes
Like French Fries
Good looks and all
But with Godzilla thighs

Alright, stop
Or I’ll call the cops
Just like she’d do
While drugged out on pot

I mean it
Surcease it
Think of her well
Don’t demean those tits

They were nice
Can’t say a vice
But that was before
They were bit off by mice

Enough! Enough!
Of tits, thighs, and bellies
You’ve got it wrong
It was how… she’s smelly

Like cinnamon
Or roses
Maple syrup
When laced with cow dung!

That’s it, stop
I’ve had enough of this
Was this all it was
Senor hurt penis

So cease it
Don’t bleed more
It’s clear the need
But that’s deceased… so

Release her
And free this mind
She had a nice behind,
Damn it, behind y’!

---

Here you see a clown
His world upside down
Because he built a mound
On lovey dovey ground

It’s an old story
And we all know how
Love is shaky ground
His love just comes in…

----

Do over
Let’s go back again
There was once a time
When we were best friends

What happened?
I’ll tell y’ honestly
Cause I’m thinking now
I’ve been jipped, you see

She moved up
She moved on
Made me care
Then ooops she’s gone

Got new friends
Got better friends
Followed her heart
When it meant ascent

But that’s alright
I’m over that
As I said before
She was a tad bit fat

And what I’ve learned
Is when you get burned
Don’t share your heart
To that point of no return

For we were friends
Yes, best friends
Oh what a joke
She was my heart’s extent

I loved her
I mean I love her
Hell, she was the one
Who pointed out past tense!

And now she’s with
A loser
A pretty boy
Who just likes to do her

Yes, do her
That means screw her
Oh screw it
I mean nothing to her

So it’s over
All over
In love that way
So even “friends” is over

----

Sometimes a clown
When he’s feeling down
Is allowed to pout
To let it all come out

That’s this time for him
This is just his pout
From a clown in love
Learning to live with…

---

That was months ago
One heart ago
One life ago
Four friends ago

So lately,
I’m great see
My parents hate me
And no girl will date me

I’ve been anointed
Most disappointing
Won’t you join me
When there’s no point, see?

Just sitting
And writing
What else is there
When a heart is writhing

I’m insane
And in pain
That’s what it says
Right here on the meds

Ha ha Ha
Ha ha ha
Red nose is what
Gin will get y’

Ha Ha Ha
Ha Ha Ha
Love’s the joke
Didn’t she tell y’?

Ha Ha Ha
Ha Ha Ha
This downtown clown
Heard “foreva”

Ha Ha Ha
Ha Ha Ha
Ain’t it plain
Love is the clown’s refrain!

Now stop it
Forget it
Time is the cure
Aye professor!

Then one person
That’s what she said
But the memories
Have an extended run!

What you see
So I see
When no one’s here
Just split personalities

The talking
And walking
Memory lane
That poison!

How do you
Get over
When a heart has
Been run over

How do you
Get over
When the truth is
There’s no dooooo overs

-----

Sometimes a clown
When he’s feeling down
Can’t get her out
And that love’s a rout

Don’t feel bad for him
He’s just learning now
Love is a great story
His just is bled in sound

----

I need a drink now
Not a pow wow
Perhaps a lullaby
If it’s called “ode to cow”

But that will have to wait
Until I find a date
But what will I say
Love’s only meant for gays?

Probably
Well maybe
Are you in love?
Well, just you wait, see…

For love is
The greatest
But what do I know
I’ve never even been kissed

Wait, what,
Yeah, it’s true
Is love in a kiss?
I wouldn't know

It's just, well,
Well, you know,
Okay, maybe you don't
It's just... well, I miss her

And it hurts.

Send in the Clowns

2010-08-15T11:57:00.000-07:00

From the great Stephen Sondheim--- you probably know his work from "West Side Story" or "The Ballad of Sweeney Todd"--- comes this gem. Clearly, Michael Douglas is perhaps the luckiest man in the world. This is from the musical "A Litle Night Music". You may recognize this as a song by Frank Sinatra, and though I'm a big fan of his, I think this song sounds better with its intended female voice. Enjoy!

-P

Infuse Your Body To The Music

2010-08-07T08:07:00.001-07:00

Ok, so the creative process on this one was a little unusual...

As most of you know, I like watching movie trailers. So... I happened upon the one for "Step Up 3D" (posted below). It reminded me of a friend of a friend named Q who I greatly respect. You see, Q is part of "Capital Funk", and they do amazing dancing like the type featured in the film. Perhaps the trait I admire most in people (and also probably one of the rarest I ever see) is genuine courage. And, well, I think the guts and ability to go up in front of people and to pull off these dance routines is simply amazing--- Q gets extra props because he not only dances, but also mentors. Plus they're just doing what they love... only because they love it... and I, obviously, am really impressed by that.

Anyway, this train of thought got me into thinking about the last time I danced in public (Niko's party), and it was perhaps the freest I have ever felt-- I danced for one song but it felt heavenly--- it really felt like my body was completely free for one moment--- that only the music compelled me--- and I was at one with it... So... well, given all of these wonderful thoughts...I was inspired to write the following song--- I think it's pretty darn good, and it's meant to be danced to at a fast pace. Thanks Q, Capital Funk, and whoever made the Step Up 3D movie (perhaps I'll go see it)... oh, and Niko, for inviting me to his party... :-P

-----------------------

Infuse Your Body To The Music

When the moment moves y’
Don’t refuse it
Infuse your body to the music--- ic--- ic--- ic--- ic--- ic--- ic---ic—ic- ic…..

So you think you’re a pop star
A rock star, a wish upon a star star
Whose dream prince and souped car
Go to the tune of “Hello On-Star”
But out here star, that dream card
Won’t take you past that cash bar
Each trance, girl, each glance, girl
Belongs to each true dancer.

So you want it, and you feel it
But first you gotta free it
All the nerves girl
And the feelings
Just let ‘em hit the ceiling
For it wants you and it taunts you
That beat to make you art whom
Can live it and breathe it
The music beats so be it.

The music beats so be it
The music beats so be it
The music beats so be it…

[flurry of fast music—into chorus]

Get your body down, with it
Oh get it down, with it
Infuse your body to the music
Infuse it to the music

Get your body down, with it
Oh get it down, with it
Infuse your body to the music
Infuse it to the music

Get your body down, with it
Oh get it down, with it
Infuse your body to the music
Infuse it to the music

Get your body down, with it
Oh get it down, with it
Infuse your body to the music
Infuse it to the...

Ok its step two
And who knew
Your moves would get you through to
The being a being
Whose gravity deceiving
Not a pop star
Not a rock star
Not a wish upon a star star
A real star
A true star
A just who you truly are star

So shake it and break it
The sound barrier
Make it
It’s your turn
So move it
You’re a fire set to music

It’s your turn
So move it
As a fire set to music
Just move it
And use it
You’re a fire set to music

[flurry of music]

Get your body down, with it
Oh get it down, with it
Infuse your body to the music
Infuse it to the music

Get your body down, with it
Oh get it down, with it
Infuse your body to the music
Infuse it to the music

Get your body down, with it
Oh get it down, with it
Infuse your body to the music
Infuse it to the music

Get your body down, with it
Oh get it down, with it
Infuse your body to the music
Infuse it to the...

Whoah it’s hot here
So what’s clear
Is you have impressed this man here
For I take cues
From my man Q
And he says your dancing is… “coo”
For your moves, dear
This space here
It holds me like I’ve lost fear
And that’s dancing
That singing
That’s living like
A damn king

For the beat has
The heat has
Transformed me as a cheetah
I release it
Unleash it
With the bounce of double d’s and
It’s got me
Forgot me
No longer a robot me
‘Cause your moves dear
This place here
Heaven is without fear

Yes heaven is without fear
Oh heaven is without fear…

[musical flurry]

Get your body down, with it
Oh get it down, with it
Infuse your body to the music
Infuse it to the music!

Get your body down, with it
Oh get it down, with it
Infuse your body to the music
Infuse it to the music!

Get your body down, with it
Oh get it down, with it
Infuse your body to the music
Oh move it to the music!

Get your body down, with it
Oh get it down, with it
Infuse your body to the music
Infuse it to the...

It’s the ending
So send me
Your last rights
By air bending
For your style
And your smile
Have caught me
No pretending
So do it
And move it
You’re something hot
You prove it
So groove it
And move it
You are a star
And now you’re moon lit!

The music beats
You be it
Your heart beats
And you feel it
A star is born
You see it
And now it’s time
So free it!

[musical flurry]

Get your body down, with it
Oh get it down, with it
Infuse your body to the music
Infuse it to the music!

Get your body down, with it
Oh get it down, with it
Infuse your body to the music
Infuse it to the music

Get your body down, with it
Oh get it down, with it
Move that body, nothing to it
Just move it to the music!

Get your body down, with it
Oh get it down, with it
You’re a star, no more to prove it
You know it; never lose it!

----------
----------

Creative process:

1) First I saw this: Step Up 3D Trailer:

2. Remembered this: Capital Funk

3. Remembered the feeling the last time I danced (at a skill level much worse than above--- but still awesome)...

4. Wrote the above song!!! Hurrah! :-P

Use Your Voice!

2010-07-25T11:23:00.000-07:00

So… I promised you something a bit "nicer" this weekend. I would say rap artists such as Eminem are my inspiration for this one (as well as art such as the film below). You should read it/ (maybe sing it?) as a rap song. As always, I hope you enjoy! I hope you had a great weekend too.

:-P

---------

Use Your Voice

Who are you
What are you made of
Are you, well,
Afraid of
Speaking up
Standing up
Showing your class
With your hand up

There’s violence
In silence
The sort of violence
Met with silence
We know it
We feel it
But most of us
Don’t go near it

But truth is
It’s coming
And justice
Ain’t running
Inside us
There’s fighters
Inside us
There’s righters

So feel it
And be it
That lion
Release it
Not lyin’
Not cheatin’
Your truth needs now
Believin’

So stand up
And be it
So stand up
And free it
Just get up
Release it
This is your time
Believe it

Let go--- what no one knows
Let go--- what no one knows
Let go--- what no one knows
For you’ll never know what you are made of
Until you shout what you’re afraid of

Everybody has a choice to use that voice
Everybody has a choice to use that voice
Everybody has a choice to use that voice
So c’mon now, c’mon use your voice!
Everybody has a choice to use that voice
Everybody has a choice to use that voice
Everybody has a choice to use that voice
So c’mon now just use your voice!

You man enough?
Woman enough?
Are you tough enough?
To confront your stuff
Get knocked down
Do you stand up?
And say aloud
Now that’s enough!

Do you fight for?
And make right for?
Those neighbors
Most don’t give a damn for
Will you get up
Will you step up
And say “damn it
Life is my cause!”

Will you find it?
And fight it?
That evil
Will you help right it?
Will you stand up?
Will you be it?
Who you are inside
Do you feel it?

There’s haters
There’s doubters
There’s those who just
Try to down us
Will you shake ‘em?
Will you break ‘em?
This is your truth
Now take it!

So while many are lying awake in bed
Going over every little thing that’s said
And they can’t control their burning eyes of red
And they can’t control the many tears they’ve shed
Are you gonna stand back and let that plight
Consume the bullied as they cry the night
Or are you gonna speak up and make it right
Are you gonna stand up and join that fight!

For there are so many wrongs that are goin’ on
It’s amazing how we all can’t get along
But will you explore what your own love is for
Or will you let your fears stop you from becoming more
So while some are lying... lying, lying!
And others are crying, crying!
Because who they are might not be flying
They know their place.... can’t be defying!

Are you gonna stand up and say “enough!”
Are you gonna stand up and say “enough!”
Whenever times are gettin’ tough
Will you back down to some bully’s fluff
Or will you feel your stomach stirrin
And will you find that inner courage
That who you are is for a reason
And it’s well past time you start believin!

Everybody has a choice to use that voice
Everybody has a choice to use that voice
Everybody has a choice to use that voice
So c’mon now.... c’mon use your voice!
Everybody has a choice to use that voice
Everybody has a choice to use that voice
Everybody has a choice to use that voice
You know your heart, so now use your voice!

Sexism?
Racism?
And plenty other
Isms
Glass ceilings
Hurt feelings
That make our
Hearts go reeling
Got fired?
Admired?
Or lost in “bad”
Desire?
Red faces
Closed spaces
Wrong side
Of god's good graces
Ask out her
But doubt her
Answer won’t
Be disaster
With doozies
And floozies
Thinkin’ they
Define beauty
You know it
You feel it
This pain of life
You can’t heal it
It’s stirrin’
It’s burnin’
But right now
It needs courage

I need a little time to think... No, Let it Go!
I need a little time to think... No. Let it Go!
I need a little time to think... No, Let it Go! No, Let it Go! Just let it Go!
I need a little time to think… No let it Go!
Just a little time to think… No let it Go!
Well what do you think? Just let it go! I say let it go! Just let it go!

For we all hide something deep inside
We call it perhaps our own dark side
And a friend of mine says we all have fear
But in my life it wasn’t worth the tears
‘Cause we all have a love that’s burnin,’ burnin
Within our guts most call it courage
And it demands from every woman, man
To speak up for those who maybe can’t
So will you reach deep inside yourself
And grab those fears most never get
And will you shout them as your truth
And let them go, just cut em’ loose!
For life is way too short to cover
All those truths you could discover
When life has pain there is a truth
That who you are
Is no one other!

Yes who you are
Is no one other!
Yes who you are
Is no one other!
That was my fear
And I was smothered
When I lived my life
As some one other!

Everybody has a choice to use that voice
Everybody has a choice to use that voice
Everybody has a choice to use that voice
So c’mon now, c’mon use your voice!
Everybody has a choice to use that voice
Everybody has a choice to use that voice
Everybody has a choice to use that voice
So learn from me and use your voice!

Go ahead now and free that mind
And leave those icky fears behind
Cause that’s the time we all discover
That who we are is no one other
So take that thing that no one knows
And cut it loose, just let it go
For you’ll never know what you are made of
Until you shout what you’re afraid of

You’ll never know what you are made of
Until you shout what you’re afraid of

You’ll never know what you are made of
Until you shout what you’re afraid of

You’ll never know what you are made of
Until you shout what you’re afraid of

So let It go,
So let it go,
So let it go

You know that thing that no one knows
Just tear it up
And let all that truth in beauty show…

[music—end]

Dead Poet's Society

2010-07-25T11:11:00.000-07:00

Ok, so I post this scene from the great film "Dead Poet's Society" for two reasons:

1) It really bothered me when my work was criticized for its "poor meter". But the more I think of it... the more idiotic I think those "experts" were... if poetry has to be limited to some prescribed meter--- doesn't that by definition limit the amount of creativity and meaning that an author has? Isn't that almost contrary to the very nature of poetry? So this film gives my self-confidence a lift... :-)

2) I love this scene. And it helped inspire the above song.

Please do not watch this clip if you have not seen the film. As it is the final scene, it may ruin the film for you... SEE THE FILM!!! I just posted it, because I often post things for their meaning, and I think this scene has quite a lot of that. -P

An honest youth

2010-07-18T11:12:00.001-07:00

Alright, so this one has a whole lot of angst. Perhaps upon rewrite I'll make it a bit nicer. But it really has a lot of potential; I think the chorus is especially good. This is probably one of my better songs... I owe a lot to Bob Dylan on it... I hope to bring you next weekend a song that's a bit nicer and sunny.

-P

------------------------------

An Honest Youth

Don’t play with that dress
When your mind’s a mess
Don’t play with that hair
‘Cause you don’t really care
Don’t give him that eye
When all y’ do is lie
This boy don’t need
You and your practiced smiles

Woman! Woman! Woman!
You’re not what he needs
And you men with
Your touchy come-ons
Some space please
What this boy needs
Is not what you need
He needs a world that gives a damn
about honesty

‘Cause he’s an honest youth
Caught in a land of bigotry
Searching for some truth
That might set him free
He don’t know who you are
Or even who he be
He’s just an honest youth
Searching for some truth

They say this world’s in pain
Their dreams are in vain
This is my epic “come on”
To their trite refrains
I know very few
Better off than you
A house, two kids,
Keep on playin’ that game

Sure, people suffer
And so the world is rote
Because we’re playing apart
Within our narrow scopes
And we end up
With that same ole’ song
Of injustice through greed
Did the boy get that wrong?

What is a wish
If it ain’t selfish?
And what is a dream
If it ain’t crazy?
What is our world
Without these crazy tiers?
Yeah, I heard you’re broke
May this boy spare his tears

‘Cause he’s an honest youth
Caught in a land of bigotry
Searching for some truth
That might set him free
He don’t know who you are
Or even who he be
Just a boy lookin’ for
Some honesty

Oh look at them
Those people in charge
With their false gods
Convicts at large
Their livin’ off
The same words of fear
I can’t think of anything
Any more queer

So this boy now
He lives alone
He’s afraid to hurt
When his truth’s unknown
Afraid of himself
With his body of lies
What’s the use to a youth
Who can't read his own eyes

The hurt, the hurt, the hurt
He self inflicts
Because he cannot realize
He’s worth more than shit
And so he lives
All alone
Life has shown him one truth
He is on his own

‘Cause he’s an honest youth
Caught in a land of bigotry
Searching for some truth
That might set him free
He don’t know who you are
Or even who he be
He’s just an honest youth
Scared of this god-damn bigotry

And so you say
This boy’s diseased
I think you missed the point
Of this tragedy
When a boy’s life
Is built up in lies
It takes a lot of false words
To destroy a rise

Right now he’s free
Cause he’s out there dancing
Cause this poetry shit
It’s not the freeing lit
It’s the dying cry
It’s the bloodied call
Just the inky remains
Of one young lad’s fall

So you know who you are
You know better than him
Or do you really
Or is your mind just dim
Perhaps you forgot about
True reality
Love, poverty?
No, stupid,
It’s the economy

Cause you’re privileged shit
In a world of luxury
Not caring for those
Who live different than thee
You pretend to care
Yeah, you pretend to care
But you simply do not
Have you ever compared?

No stupid
Cause it’s the economy
No stupid
Cause it’s the economy
No stupid
Cause it’s the economy

And that’s the truth
Of a youth
Who sought honesty

And I’ll admit
You shits
Are doin’ better than he

Yes you are
Yes you are
Oh yes you are

[Harsh, strong, music]

[End]

Christmas in July!

2010-07-18T10:32:00.000-07:00

Ok, so if this one offends... you take Christmas too seriously! :-P

Admittedly, it is a rather "different" Christmas song. I think it's rather catchy and funny though. I hope you enjoy!

-P

--------------------------

Santa! Santa!

I am below the mistletoe
It is that time of year

Santa Santa
Did you miss?
I asked you for
A Christmas wish

Santa, I’ve been good this year
I’ve given hope, good cheer
I’ve given love
I’ve given hugs
And up above
Mistletoe is hung…

Santa, Santa
Where’s my answer
Coming from your lips
It’s getting late
And I’m afraid
I’m gonna miss my Christmas wish…

Santa, Santa,
Where’s that answer
Where’s my Christmas wish….
Mrs. Santa
Doesn’t’ have to
Know my Christmas…

(speed up the music)

Santa Santa
Did you happen to miss?
On my list
Is a Christmas wish!

Santa Santa
Did you happen to miss?
I need your lips
For a Christmas kiss!

For all year long,
I’ve been very good
Been a saint
Given to charities
I’ve helped the poor
And fed the needy
And all I ask is you
So don’t call me greedy…

Santa, Santa
Did you happen to miss?
On my list
Is a Christmas kiss!

Santa Santa
Did you happen to miss
I need your lips
For that Christmas kiss!

For there is no bliss
At Christmas time
Like you, my hunk, Saint Nick!

For I’ve been so nice
As I said all year
But my lips are dry
By that Christmas tree!

Santa Santa
Did you happen to miss
On my list
Is a Christmas kiss!

Santa Santa
Did you happen to miss
I need your lips for
That Christmas kiss!

‘Cause I’ve been so nice
As I said, all year
Been so full of Christmas cheer
And ‘cause I’ve been so good
Oh so very good
I’m only asking if you could be….
Naughty…

Oh there is no hunk, at Christmas time
Like you, my hunk, Saint Nick
You have lots of chunk
And a great big trunk
With a belly to bounce in me!

Oh Santa, baby
Can I be your lady
Just one night with you, Saint Nick?
Because Santa, baby,
If you’re running late
I will make it quick, you’ll see….

Santa Santa
Can I be your lady
Just one night
Each Christmas Eve
Because I talked to Adam
And he said that snakes
Always like to come
Each Eve

Santa, Santa
I saw you lately
While purring in my sleep
And under your belly
Was a big roll of jelly
That was creeping
Up each peep.

Oh I cannot sleep
Though I will always keep
My mouth shut
Each kissed Eve
For Mrs. Santa
Doesn’t have to
Know what’s down
In my chimney

Santa Santa
Oh I’ve been so good
Oh so very very good
And now it would be so nice
Oh so very nice
If you could bring not coal, but your wood

Santa Santa!
(music)

Santa Santa!
(music)

Santa Santa!
(music)

Oh Santa Santa
(music)

Santa Santa
Did you get my list?
All I need
Is a Christmas kiss!

Santa, Santa
Did you happen to miss?
All I need
Is a Christmas kiss!

For Tis’ the season
For all good girls
Tis’ the season
For a girl like me!

And though I’m talkin’ naughty
I’ve been so good
And it was all
For you and me

And I need you present
For my Christmas present
Just wrapped
In fat and fleece

For this is one Miss
Who just can’t miss
That bliss
On Christmas Eve!

I’ll be waiting all night
For you, that’s right
To come ho ho- i-ng down my
Chimney

Just imagine us snug
Lying on my rug
I have cookies
Perked and ready

Santa Santa
I am your lady
I am your Christmas treat

And though I’ve been so good
Oh so very good
It’s time for
Milk and honey

Santa Santa
Did you happen to miss
I need your lips
For a Christmas kiss!

Santa Santa
Did you happen to miss
I need your lips
For that Christmas kiss!

Santa Santa!

Santa Santa!

It’s Christmas time
It’s naughty time
Tis the season
For you and me

Cause’ Santa baby
I am your lady
And I’m feeling
Quite horny

Come get your present
Get your
Christmas present
I’ll be waiting
By that tree

For Santa baby
Even kids know
How good you are at
Chimneys

Come get your present
Get your Christmas present
I’ve been waiting
Patiently

For tis the season
For all good girls
Tis the season
For you in me

Oh Santa Santa
Oh Santa Santa
Oh Santa Santa

Come on down
And make love to me!

[music]
[music]
[music]

[spoken]
Do you want some milk
With these cookies?

[music]

Ohhhhh yeah

[End]

2010 Birthday Resolution

2010-07-02T13:20:00.000-07:00

Yay!!! It’s my birthday (well, tomorrow)!!! Time to assess how I did in the past year, and what goals I have for this upcoming year:

Last Year’s Goals:

1. Write a musical.
2. Write a book of kid’s animal poetry.

New Year’s Resolution:

1. Have musical on Broadway within 5 (now 4.5) years.

Assessment:

Well, I am really proud of myself. I did a lot of good work this past year. I have written a musical that is funny, sad, entertaining, important, meaningful… and of very high quality… in short, it’s very possibly the best musical in the past 20 years (or I at least feel it has that potential). It certainly measures up very well against other recent Tony Winners like “Spring Awakening”, “Billy Elliott”, and “In the Heights”. Trust me, although I sound a bit delusional here, I am very confident it’s that good.

As for the animal poetry, well, that took a bit of a set-back. I went to this SCBWI conference in NY where I paid a lot of money to get feedback from “experts”. They told me there was virtually no market for rhyming animal poetry. One expert told me “Think of China… where they would translate your poems into that language… it’s just not going to work.” Another one of the work-group members wrote this colorful snippet: “If you read your poems aloud and S-L-O-W-L-Y you will find problems”--- and yes she really did put the hyphens in between "SLOWLY". I must say it was not the most positive experience in my life. But, oh well, has that ever stopped me? I think my animal poetry needs some edits, and could serve to be less preachy and more silly/informative at times, but I’m still proud of it--- and the “Know Them Through Poems” series is still something I hope to achieve in life.

As for this coming year’s Goals:

1. Find a composer for the musical: “The Animals”. As I said, this musical has a tremendous amount of potential. Yes, it’s partly about homophobia and is strictly for adults (which will hurt its box office compared to say “Wicked”)… but in terms of quality it truly does measure up very well with what has been released in recent years . Towards this goal:

a. This month, become a member of the Dramatists Guild.

b. Make a targeted effort to send a draft of musical to composers, musical professors, agents, theatres, maybe even bands that might be interested. I have three requirements for a composer--- 1) Has to be able to produce Broadway-caliber music; 2) Has to be passionate about gay rights/ marriage equality, and 3) Has to believe in this musical as much as I do. I will probably be making a trip to NYC to make in-person visits, and will also probably make in-person visits to just about every theatre in DC.

c. If I can find a composer and have music by January (huge Ifs), submit musical for consideration to the New York Music Theater festival: http://www.nymf.org/Page.70.html

d. Don’t give up!!! At this point the musical’s future is not entirely in my hands… but I cannot give up on this musical--- ever. I really, truly, believe in it--- both in its message and quality. If by the same time this year, nothing has happened, my goal is to keep working on it, and keep investing in it.

e. To that end…. If I get desperate… I may post these songs acapella via youtube--- and have considered buying a keyboard and trying to learn the basics—this would not be my first choice, though… at the same time, I have received very few comments on this blog, and I have gotten the impression that people just can’t translate words into songs without being shown…and it’s really my job to show people…

2. I have to start a new project

a. I just took part in a 24-hour musical called “Next Stop Zombie Love”, of which I was the primary lyricist of this song called “Zombie Love”… my friend John was saying how there might be a market for a musical about zombies… and when I was in elementary school I wrote this story about werewolves, Frankenstein’s monster, and Dracula invading the elementary school--- I have been thinking (considering some of my juvenile music like “Arrested by Her Breasts”) that I could write a 90-minute musical spoof about monsters attacking a high school… and make it extremely silly and ridiculous--- basically like the “Scary Movie” spoofs except in song--- what do you think? :-P

Not sure definitively if that’s my next project, but this sort of project would require about 10 songs--- and I hope to have something written up by this time next year. Plus, it will be a nice breather from “The Animals”--- when I wrote that musical--- strangers would actually come up to me and ask me if I were okay—it was rather intense.

Oh and I can’t wait until "Next Stop Zombie Love" is on Youtube--- I wrote most of the lyrics for “Zombie love” and the chorus for another song “Don’t Sing a Song If It Ain’t About Love” (basically I wrote that line--- though “if it” was changed to “that” :-) )… and although the music was completely different than what I envisioned when I wrote the lyrics--- I think the group did an extremely good job--- and am really proud of my participation and the group’s product. I learned a whole lot about musical production from that experience. I hope you watch it if it’s ever posted online--- I will link to it on this blog.

3. More progress on “Know Them Through Poems” series.

a. Ideally, I would like to develop a website called “knowthemthroughpoems.com” so that people could look at my kids’ stuff without also viewing some of my adult-lyrics on this blog. In addition to establishing a website, I would like to clean up some of the existing poems, and work on additional series about birds, American Presidents, mythology, and other stuff I’m really interested in--- I may start with “monsters” and then transition some of those ideas into this potential high school themed musical--- just as I did with some of the animal poetry into "the Animals".

4. I would like to get in better shape--- I started this month with people calling me “fat”. As a bit of a perfectionist, that just wasn’t acceptable. I’ve lost about 5 pounds this month… and would like to be at least 10 pounds lighter than I started this month by next year--- and maintain that for years to come.

5. Thanks God. I always want to be humble. Yes, calling my musical maybe the best in 20 years isn’t exactly humble, but I’m also trying to sell this musical now, and well, I honestly do believe it is that good. I know a lot of you like to mock Jesus and God and the rest… and well… I am quite the comedian myself… but I do believe in a higher being--- in a higher purpose--- and I am so grateful, truly grateful, for everything God has provided for me… I still pray about my family, friends, and even this musical every night. I really am a very lucky guy… Ok… onto year number 27!!!! Wish me luck, y’all!!! I really do appreciate all of you who read this blog and have supported me.

:-P

I, Don Quixote

2010-07-02T13:14:00.000-07:00

"I, Don Quixote" lyrics by Joe Darion, music by Mitch Leigh... from the musical "Man of La Mancha". Performed by Brian Stokes Mitchell and Ernie Sabella... As you all know, Don Quixote is da' man!

Arrested By Her Breasts

2010-06-18T10:54:00.000-07:00

Ok, if this one offends anyone please let me know... one of my friends said that when I turn 40 I will be "that creepy guy with a blog". I sincerely hope she's wrong. This one is really meant to be funny, ridiculous, and also, obviously, catchy. I hope it brings a smile. If it really makes you uncomfortable... know that I am not writing about anyone in particular (unless your man-boobs really look this good). :-P
-------------------

Arrested By Her Breasts

I was arrested by her breasts
When she came in the room
My heart went “Yes, Yes, Yes”
And my eyes went “Zooooom”

I said, “my darling
Let me guess
What you have in those tombs
How many dead men’s chests
Went
Ooo Ooo Oooooooooooooooooo?

Those breasts
Those breasts
They are the best!
(music)

They are the very, very, very , very verrrrry
Best!
(music)

One look at them
And my mind
Is put to the test!
(music)

I say
“Down boy
That ain’t your chest”

(Though he wish it were
Oh he wish it were)
[music]

Some girls
They rock my world
[music]

With their pretty calves
And pretty pearls
[music]

And some girls
Are such a treat
[music]

With their pretty smiles,
And waists petite
[music]

And some girls
Rock a mighty ass
[music]

Tilt their bottoms like
Time in an hour glass
[music]

But you, babe,
You are the best
For with those magic breasts
You give my heart no rest!

[Music] Ohhhhhhhh!

I was arrested by her breasts
When she came in the room
My heart said “Yes, Yes, Yes”
And my eyes went “Zooooom”

Oh how can I express
How my pants went kaBoooooom
When I saw that chest with
Two boom boom booms

Boom Boom Boom
Boo-boo booooooooooobs!
[music}

Boom Boom Boom
Boo- boo booooooooooobs!
[music]

Oh I wish my boo
Had those boobs
(music)

Perhaps you might
Become my boo?

(Oh could you be my boo
So I could feel your boobs?)

[music]

Some folks my might say
This song is bad
[music]

You, sir, are not a
Gentleman
[music]

I do not want them
In my shoes
[music]

For then they might be
Singings boobs
[music]

For sirs I am one lucky man
[music]
And like to dream when I can
[music]

Why must a poet go through hoops
[music]
When he just loves to look at boooooooobs?
(music)

I was arrested by her breasts
When she came in the room
My heart went “Yes, Yes, Yes”
And my eyes went “Zooooooom”

Oh how can I express
How my mind went “Kaboom”
When I saw those breasts
And went Coo-coo Kooooooo!

(music)

Cuckoo Cuckoo! Coo-coo-KOOOOO

(Music)

Cuckoo Cuckoo! Coo-coo KOOOOO

(music)

Mine eyes have never seen such beauty
As what makes up your perfect boobies

Oh I have never seen such beauty
As what makes up your perfect boobies

Oh I wish my boo
Had your boobs

Do you like dudes
How I like boooooobs?

Could you see me
How I see your boobs?

Oh could you ever love me
How I love those boooooobs?

[music] [end]

"The Animals" (a musical): Act 2

2010-06-13T18:02:00.000-07:00

Ok, y'all, so here it is... it's my first draft (so be very critical)... Now I will go about the process of acting it out (over and over and over again), timing it, correcting its flaws, and trying to make it the best musical possible. I doubt any of you will read it (and that's perfectly okay), but I just wanted to show you that I'm trying. :-P If any of you are interested in reading it, I would be happy to send you the full draft in MS Word--- though I will be constantly editing it from here on out...

-Peyton

------------------------

The Animals
Book and Lyrics by Peyton Charles Ware

ACT 2

SENATOR WOLFE

With the Pope’s visit just a few days away, I wanted to share a few words on family values. What do we mean when we say family values? I think it comes down to love, to trust, to knowing, without a doubt, no matter what, I will support you, love you, and be there for you. That’s what I mean when I say family values. And as your senator, for the past 17 years, I have come to regard you all as my extended family. And just as I would for my wife, or my son, when the going got tough, who was there for you? When you needed a voice, who spoke up for you? And when you needed a man to get the job done, who got the job done? With the pope’s visit just a few days away; I think it’s a good time to remember what’s most important. I am your Senator Edward Wolfe, and I ask for your continued support next Tuesday.

Song # 16: The Action of Passion

ENSEMBLE #4

Lights, Camera, Action…

ENSEMBLE

The coming attraction
To the latest attraction
Is the action of passion
The action of passion

The only beat
To the heat
Of two bodies
Is the action of passion
The action of passion

So take your clothes
Take your clothes
Take your clothes
All off
So we can touch you
We can feel you
In the natural buff

So take your clothes
Take your clothes
Take your clothes
All off

And we will
Dance
Dance
Dance
In the natural buff

ENSEMBLE #1

As the only beat
Of the heat of two bodies

ENSEMBLE

Is the action of passion
The action of passion

ENSEMBLE #2

The only heat
From the beat of two bodies

ENSEMBLE

Is the action of passion
The action of passion

ENSEMBLE #3

The way we breathe
In the midst of two bodies

ENSEMBLE

Is the action of passion
The action of passion

ENSEMBLE #4

What the animal needs
Is the gift of two bodies

ENSEMBLE

In the action of passion
The action of passion!

[music and dancing]

ENSEMBLE

The action of passion
The action of passion

[music and dancing]

The action of passion
The action of passion

[music and dancing]

The action of passion

ENSEMBLE #5

As the physics
Of physical action

ENSEMBLE

Is every touch
Has an equal and warm
Reaction

ENSEMBLE #4

As the physics
Of physical action

ENSEMBLE

Is while you
Shake it
Shake it
Shake it
You will get a reaction!

ENSEMBLE #2

As the physics
Of physical action

ENSEMBLE #3

Is that you my, babe
Are the main attraction

ENSEMBLE

As the physics
Of physical action

Is gravity don’t exist
When I see you in action

[uh uh uh uh uh uh]

The physics
Of physical passion

[uh uh uh uh uh uh]

The passion
In a moment of action

[uh uh uh uh uh uh]

Every touch
Is a state of reaction

[uh uh uh uh uh uh]

To the action
Of physical passion

ENSEMBLE #2

Can you imagin’?
A moment of passion’

ENSEMBLE #1

Can you imagin’
A bed frame smashin’

ENSEMBLE #4

Can you imagin’?
A moment of passion’

ENSEMBLE #3

Can you you imagin’?
A monster mashin’

ENSEMBLE #5

Can you imagin’?
A moment of passion

ENSEMBLE #2

All I know is this
You have plenty to ration

ENSEMBLE

As the beat
Of the heat
Is some magical stuff

ENSEMBLE #1

I’d like to meet you, meet you, meet you
In some handcuffs

ENSEMBLE

As the beat
Of the heat
Is some magical stuff

ENSEMBLE #3

I‘d like you when you shake-a, shake-a, shake-a
Shake-a that butt!

ENSEMBLE

[uh uh uh uh uh uh]

The physics
Of physical passion

[uh uh uh uh uh uh]

The passion
Of a moment of action!

[uh uh uh uh uh uh]

Every touch
Is a state of reaction!

[uh uh uh uh uh uh]

To the action
Of physical passion!

[Scene Changes]

NATASHA

So Honey, what did you think of the play we saw tonight?

HUSBAND [ENSEMBLE #1]

[Waves his hand]

NATASHA

Well, what did you like about it?

HUSBAND

[Shows he’s reading a book]

NATASHA

I really liked the lead… he was really handsome and sexy… I would do him.

HUSBAND

[silent]

NATASHA

Will you look at me?

Song #17 I want something more today

If you love me
Why don't you show it?
Why don’t you say "I had a really good time"

I want to know it
I want to feel it
I'm tired of livin' out the same crappy life.

'Cause I want something more today
(music)
I want someone who will feeel it myyyyy wayyyyyy
(music)
Oh I want something more today
(music)
Oh I want something more today

I'm just a poet
Didn't you know it?
And, you ass, this is my answering rhyme

I want to see it
I want to feel it
I'm tired of screaming to your fucking behind

Cause I want something more today
(music)
I want someone who will feeel it myyyyy wayyyyyy
(music)
I want something more today
(music)
I want something more today

Is this you inspired?
Are you too tired
Here's a calculator, just go jack off to that

You say I'm wired!
Your heart's expired!
There's a reason I have to go see a quack!

Cause I want something more today
(music)
I want someone who will feeel it myyyyy wayyyyyy
(music)
Oh… I want something more today (music)
I want something more today (music)
I want something more today (music

I’m leaving!

[Door slams]

[Scene Change]

JACOB

What are you thinking about?

NATHAN

Oh nothing.

JACOB

Oh c’mon, you’re in one of those deep, deep, the world is on my shoulder modes… it would give Socrates a headache.

NATHAN

If you must know, I’ve just been giving a lot of thought… to us, about everything.

JACOB

And?

NATHAN

Well, it’s strange. I was just thinking how in every movie, the whole point is, you know, “to just be yourself”.

JACOB

Well, I always thought that was a good thing.

NATHAN

Of course, it’s a good thing. Obviously, everyone should be themselves.

JACOB

But…

NATHAN

It’s just that… It’s just that… I have come to realize I am 27 years old and have no idea who I am. They always say “Just be yourself”, but I have no idea who that is.

JACOB

Oh that’s no big deal.

NATHAN

How can you say that? Just a few months ago I thought I was in love with Natasha… and now I’m in love with you. How would you feel if you lived a lie for most of your life…

JACOB

Nate, you’re one of the most generous, kindest, men I know. Not to mention handsome.

NATHAN

That’s not what I meant.

JACOB

Ok. Ok. It’s just that I don’t think any of us really know 100% who we are. We’re each told who we can be and who we can’t be from birth. You’re not alone in that. But by conquering walls, by living, by loving, I think we can ultimately learn, and more importantly, become who we truly are.

NATHAN

But not everyone has your courage.

JACOB

Oh c’mon…

You know what… What is it that you don’t know about yourself? What is it that you doubt? Do you doubt this? Do you doubt us? Do you not think my love for you is real?

NATHAN

No, I don’t doubt this. This I know is real.

JACOB

And how do you know? How do you know that this is something true… to you.

NATHAN

Because I’ve never felt freer in my entire life… I’m the happiest I’ve ever been.

JACOB

Good.

Song #18 Unlocked the Box

For so long,
I lived in movies
And only thought of
Some plastic beauties

I did not object
To a life of objects
A world of fantasy
Was my reality

I did not know how much
A guy could use some touch
I did not know how much
A kiss could mean so much

I lived a live untrue
A life afraid of you
And lost my beauty
By ignoring beauty

But then you came to me
And what you gave to me
Was back this freedom
That burns inside of me…

[music accelerates]

JACOB

Nate…

NATHAN

You unlocked the box
And set my beauty free
And now I’m flying
f-f-f-f flying free

You unlocked the box
That they had made for me
And now I’m flying
f-f-f-f flying free

You unlocked the box…
You unlocked the box…
You unlocked the box…

JACOB

No you did.

NATHAN

It was you
Who showed me
All the love in me

It was you
Who made me want
To be
Just me

It was you
who took
all that misery

It was you
Who made me
Free to be
Just me

JACOB

Oh c’mon.

NATHAN

I was told to watch it as you’re getting old
I was told to watch it, what you’re being told
I was told to watch it and obey their rules
I just sat and watched it as my soul was used

I was told to behave just a certain way
I was told to be wary of all you creepy gays
I was told to be sure that you’re not too weak
I was told the worst thing is to be a freak

But then you showed me and my world’s forever changed
Nothing special, just that you told me plain
That to love somebody
Is to let them be
You were the first one happy to let me be just me....

JACOB

Why thanks Nate.

NATHAN

You unlocked the box
And set my beauty free
And now a part of you
Is now inside of me

You unlocked the box
Society made for me
And now I’m flying
f-f-f-f flying free

I’m not a diagram
Nor am I the fuckin’ pox
Just a man walkin’ in his clean white socks
But no matter what
If you’re trans or gay
Never ever ever let ‘em set y; straight

For they speak of god
In their haughty tones
And they preach of hate
With their holy moans

But while I suffered
Stuffed inside a man-made box
I lost sight of love
Within their holy hoax

For what I’ve learned in life is that there’s a basic truth
It came more from pain than from any sleuth
And what that truth is--- is that life can rock
When I am free and not trapped inside some box

You unlocked this box
Society made for me
And now I’m flying
f-f-f-f flying free

You unlocked the box
And set my beauty free
And now I’m flying
f-f-f-f flying free

JACOB

You’re crazy.

NATHAN

Oh we are all blessed
With an illness
Perhaps our love
Is some sort of illness
But if 1 in 10 are so truly blessed
Then this illness brings out in me my best

‘Cause I’m dancing on to a unique tune
Though some might say that we’re just two loons
But let me give to you a big thank you
For you’ve set free with a love that’s true

You unlocked the box
Society made for me
And now I’m flying
f-f-f-f flying free

You unlocked the box
And set my beauty free
And now I’m flying
f-f-f-f flying free

It was you
who made me
want to be just me

It was you
showed me
all the love in me

It was you
who set my spirit
flying free

It was you who
whose love
is in my energy

It was you who
Taught me
How to be happy

It was you
Who told me
Nothing’s wrong with me

It was you
Who told me
It’s society

It was you who
Made me
Want to be just me

JACOB

It was you
Who with this bright honesty

Manifested love
And all its energy

It is you
To whom I owe a big thank you

For it is you
Whose love comes both pure and true

It is you
Whom with complete honesty

I can say
Who you are

Is love
And no matter what else

That is beauty.

[They embrace]

-----

JACOB

So… with all that said… do you think you’re ready to tell your dad?

NATHAN

Hell no.

JACOB

Oh… c’mon… he’s coming by this afternoon… you can do it…

NATHAN

Oh, ok, I’ll try.

JACOB

Do you want me with you?

NATHAN

No.

Yes. Definitely.

[Scene Changes… pick up with Nathan in front of his dad and Jacob to the side]

----

SENATOR WOLFE

So son, how’s your job going?

NATHAN

It’s still going good.

SENATOR WOLFE

You know, I could really use you in the office on the campaign trail, especially in the next couple of weeks. Do you think you could get some time off to help?

NATHAN

Yeah, probably.

SENATOR WOLFE

Good. Let me know when. It was good to see you, son.

NATHAN

Dad, there’s something I need to tell you.

SENATOR WOLFE

Ok…

NATHAN

Well, this is really not easy for me to say.

SENATOR WOLFE

Well, what is it?

NATHAN

It’s just that Jake and I…

SENATOR WOLFE

Go ahead…

NATHAN

Dad,I am…
[knocking]

SENATOR WOLFE

Yes?

NATHAN

I am…
[Knocking on the Door]

SENATOR WOLFE

Someone’s knocking at the door.

NATHAN

But this is important.

I am…

SENATOR WOLFE

Oh… hold on a bit…

NATASHA

Hello, oh Senator Wolfe, is Nathan here?

SENATOR WOLFE

Yes, he’s right over here.

NATHASHA

Hi.

NATHAN

Hi.

NATASHA

Nathan, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking over these past few months. And I realize… well, I realize … I love you.

SENATOR WOLFE

Oh Thank God.

NATHAN

But Natasha… you’re married.

SENATOR WOLFE

Never that easy is it? [to himself---looking to heavens]

NATASHA

Yes, but I left him, Nate. I realized, probably 4 years too late, but I realized that he wasn’t right for me. It’s you I want to be with. Only you…

NATHAN

But…

NATASHA

Yes, I know I messed up, and I know my track history isn’t great, and I know I really messed things up… and I know you might need some time to think things over…

NATHAN

Natasha… I do love you.

NATASHA

Oh… I love you so much, Nathan [embraces him].

SENATOR WOLFE

Excuse me, Nate, but this is not acceptable.

JACOB

Yes definitely not! [sarcastically]

SENATOR WOLFE

Nathan, you’re the son of a United States senator, you don’t need to be falling for married women.

NATASHA

Senator, let me explain.

SENATOR WOLFE

I don’t need to hear it.

NATASHA

But sir, I swear, I love your son.

SENATOR WOLFE

That’s even worse.

NATASHA

But sir.

SENATOR WOLFE
If you really loved him, perhaps you would think of him for a moment…

JACOB

Nathan…

NATASHA

I am thinking of him!

NATHAN

Dad, Natasha…

SENATOR WOLFE and NATASHA

Yes?

NATHAN

I’m gay.

SENATOR WOLFE

Well, I’m not.

NATHAN

No, really, I’m gay.

SENATOR WOLFE

No you’re not.

NATASHA

Yeah, no you’re…

SENATOR WOLFE

But you are in love with… [points to Natasha]

NATASHA

Yes, I do love her, but I’m in love with… Jake [points to Jake]

JACOB

Hello.

SENATOR WOLFE

No son, you’re just confused… he’s tricked you…

NATHAN

No he hasn’t, dad.

SENATOR WOLFE

Yes, he has. Who are you going to obey, your father or some stranger?

NATHAN

I love him.

SENATOR WOLFE

[pause] There is a group at church that can help you. This is just a sickness, Nathan.

JACOB

Senator, he’s your son.

SENATOR WOLFE

And I’m his father, damn it!

You’re not gay. You hear me. You’re not gay. I want you to think of the pain you are causing me. I want you to think of the pain you are causing your mother. Just think about the lives you are ruining.

NATHAN

I am sorry dad.

SENATOR WOLFE

You better be sorry. Next time I talk to you, I want a full apology. And I don’t want you hanging around with scum like this. Excuse me [passes Natasha] [slams door]…

NATASHA

Is that really true, Nathan?

NATHAN

I’m sorry, Natasha.

NATASHA

But you said you loved me, was that just a lie?

NATHAN

No. Part of me really does love you. But not that part.

NATASHA

I have nobody now. Do you realize that? I have nobody.

NATHAN

I’m sorry.

JACOB

Natasha, it’s not his fault.

NATASHA

Then who’s fault is it? Can you tell me that? Who’s fault is it? [exits]

NATHAN

[pause] Well, that went well.

JACOB

Actually, I think it did.

NATHAN

You weren’t the one disowned.

JACOB

It wasn’t that bad… do you remember what happened with you?

NATHAN

Yeah… dancing animals.

JACOB

Exactly, he just has to find his truth; he’ll be okay.

NATHAN

And Natasha?

JACOB

Well, she’s free now.

NATHAN

I wish I could be free.

JACOB

Don’t we all.

Song #19 The World is Just a Zoo

JACOB

The world is just a zoo
The world is just a zoo
So many different stages
All filled with different cages

NATHAN

So what are we to do?

JACOB

Yes, what are we to do…

The world is just a zoo

ENSEMBLE

Ooo ooo oooo

JACOB

The world is just a zoo

ENSEMBLE

Oooo ooo oooo

JACOB

The pope and all his minions

NATHAN

My father and his opinions

JACOB

They offer us God’s news.

NATHAN

If we subscribe to hate-filled views.

JACOB

The world is just a zoo

ENSEMBLE

Ooo ooo oo

NATHAN

The world is just a zoo

ENSEMBLE

Ooo ooo oo

NATHAN

They want us all to change

JACOB

They think that we are strange

NATHAN

Well, aren’t we a bit?

JACOB

Not I, but you’re cuckoo

NATHAN

The world is just a zoo

JACOB

The world is just a zoo

NATHAN

The world is just a zoo

JACOB

The world is just a zoo

NATHAN and JACOB

The world is just a zoo

The world is just a zoo

The world is just a zoo

JACOB and NATHAN and ENSEMBLE

The world is just a zoo

The world is just a zoo

JACOB

So many different stages

NATHAN

All filled with different cages

JACOB

So what is it to you?

NATHAN

It’s everything… as you

JACOB

It’s me and it is you

NATHAN

It’s you and it is me

JACOB

Encaged within this zoo

NATHAN

Encaged within their zoo

JACOB

Oh how can we begin

NATHAN

If our love is just a sin

JACOB

Oh if our love’s a sin

NATHAN

What a cage they’ve placed us in

JACOB

It’s me and it is you

NATHAN

It’s you and it is me

JACOB

Encaged within this zoo

NATHAN

Encaged within their zoo

JACOB

But guess what there’s good news

NATHAN

Oh I could use good news.

JACOB

This cage was made for two

NATHAN

Oh yes, that is good news.

[JACOB and NATHAN kiss]

---

JACOB

So how can we change your dad’s mind?

NATHAN

He’s busy campaigning and getting ready for the pope’s visit.

JACOB

Oh, yes, tomorrow’s the big day.

NATHAN

Yeah, right now, he’s going to give a speech on his “family values” at City hall.

JACOB

Perfect!

NATHAN

I don’t like the sound of that…

JACOB

C’mon…

[End of scene]

SENATOR WOLFE

Tomorrow, our great state will welcome his holiness, the pope. And I am proud of all of the work and effort that has been put in to prepare for this historic visit. I am especially proud…

ENSEMBLE #3

Over here! It’s the pope!

The pope is here!!!

SENATOR WOLFE

That’s not the pope!

Song #20: I Am the Pope

[JACOB arrives in Pope costume. He is accompanied by NATHAN, ENSEMBLE #1, ENSEMBLE #2, and ENSEMBLE #4 all in Bishop costumes}

JACOB

I am the pope

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

He is the pope!

JACOB

I hope you listen

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

He hopes you listen!

JACOB

If you want to go to heaven
And glisten!

I am the pope

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

He is the pope!

JACOB

I hope you listen
To the words of the soul’s
Nutrition!

I have lived so many years
With God within my ears
Telling me the ways to live
In this world

And if you want to go to heaven
Between now and Armageddon
There’s a few rules you need
To know!

Number One

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

Number One!

JACOB

No sex!

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

No sex!

JACOB

I am the pope
What else did you expect?

I am the pope

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

He’s the pope

JACOB

So no sex!

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

No sex!

JACOB

Unless you meet a few conditions!

If you’re married
It’s okay
To have sex
Anyway
At least two times a month
Is okay
She will want you to have sex
And as a husband
Such is sex
Part of your God-given mission!

But it’s definitely not okay
To have sex, anyway
If you’re not married
Or if you are gay
For you see that is a sin
And that sex will get you in
That place that we call hell.

And all is never well
If you’re going down to hell
So listen to me, you see.
For hell is hell
And hell is hell
I tell you hell is hell.

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

Hell is hell!

JACOB

So if you want to burn
Listen to what you yearn
When you see someone you like
For I’ve seen so many guys
I’ve been lost within their eyes
But I have resisted, why oh why???

Because I don’t want to go to hell

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

No, he don’t want to go to hell

JACOB

God’s told me so many years
Have him right between my ears
And he told me not to go to hell!

So you don’t want to go to hell

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

No you don’t want to go to hell!

JACOB

And if you have sex
What else can you expect
But a one way ticket to hell!

For hell is passion’s spell
It’s the lining of her well
So don’t be listening to your flaws
Or your body’s lurid laws
Suppression is God’s holy lesson!

If you are young
And you are urgin’
To have sex
Just stay a virgin
You may not, but God will understand.

For sex
Is so much better
If you’re married
It is better
I’ve never had it
But God told me so!

Some say they don’t fit
But once you’re married that is it
If you don’t fit
Be content
And forget it!

For love is greater than sex
Unless it is gay sex
Because gay sex
Precludes love, you get it?

For I am the pope
And I hope you get it

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

He hopes you get it!

JACOB

If you don’t
Heaven… forget it.

I am the pope
I hope you get it

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

He hopes you get it!

JACOB

If you don’t
Hell, you get it?

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

Get it?

JACOB

Now, to rule number 2
I’m telling you real true
I am the pope
So I know what to do

And rule Number 2

[drum roll]

Condoms are dumb

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb
Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb

JACOB

Condoms are dumb

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb
Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb

JACOB

If you have to be rappin’
Don’t be usin’ that plastic wrappin’
Just be tap, tap, tappin
The real way

For condoms are dumb

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb

JACOB

Yes, condoms are dumb.

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb

JACOB

I said condoms are dumb!!!

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb
Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb!

JACOB

So when it comes to sex
No condoms
Just abstinence
To God
Nothing else makes sense

For God wants babies
And condoms be like rabies
If you have sex
You were meant
For punishment!

[A flurry of music]

[Enter into a kick-line]

JACOB

For we are

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

(We are!)

JACOB

We are

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

(We are!)

JACOB, NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

The rich, white men
Of the Vatican!

JACOB

We are

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

We are!

JACOB

We are

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

We are!

JACOB, NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

The rich, white men
of the Vatican!

JACOB

Shout Amen

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

Amen!

JACOB

Shout Amen
NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

Amen!

JACOB, NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

To the rich, sexless men
Of the Vatican!

JACOB

Shout Amen

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

Amen!

JACOB

Shout Amen

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

Amen!

JACOB, NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

To the rich, sexless men of the Vatican!

JACOB

One kick

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

One kick!

JACOB

Another kick

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

Another kick

JACOB, NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

Take a shot
For the men of the Vatican

For if you need heaven
Between now and Armageddon
Just listen to we men from the Vatican

For heaven when Armageddon
Is the reward we will be gettin’
For not gettin’
Any
At all…

[Break kick line]

JACOB

For I am the pope

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

He’s the pope

JACOB

I hope you listen

JACOB, NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

He hopes you listen

JACOB

If you want to go to heaven
And glisten!

I am the pope

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

He is the pope

JACOB

I hope you listen

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

He hopes you listen

JACOB

To the words of the
Soul’s nutrition!

[JACOB turns to ENSEMBLE #3 (in disguise) who was at the Senator’s rally}

For you see this boy right here
So angry and so queer
Why do you think that he is so angry?
Is it because of the church?

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

Doo-doo-doo-doo

JACOB

Is it because of a girl?

NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, #4

Doo-doo-doo-doo

JACOB

Or is it because
Behind that stern
And uptight frame
This boy right here
Is maybe
A little bit
Gay…

ENSEMBLE #3

“YOU FUCKIN FAGGOT”
“YOU FUCKIN FAGGOT”
“YOU FUCKIN FAGGOT”

[ENSEMBLE #3 attacks JACOB, mounts him and starts beating the crap out of him… NATHAN and ENSEMBLE #1, #2, and #4 come to JACOB’s aid and pull ENSEMBLE #3 off of him. NATHAN looks over JACOB who is lying on stage unconscious, perhaps dead…]

NATHAN

Jake! Jake! Wake up Jake! Please… wake up…

[Stage black….Scene change]

[Back at the zoo]

SENATOR WOLFE

Yesterday, what happened to a young man, Jacob Wilde, was very unfortunate. My prayers go out to his family at this time of sadness. There are some issues that divide us in this country, and sometimes the actions we take do not represent the people we are. It is important for us to reflect and remember that those people like young Jacob need our love and compassion. Being gay, is a mental illness, and we need to, as a country, treat this with love and compassion, not with anger.

NATHAN

Dad. How can you say this??

SENATOR WOLFE

Son, we can go over this later.

NATHAN

But dad. I am gay. And I love Jacob. How can you say that after you saw what happened.

SENATOR WOLFE

My son is just a little distressed and confused.

NATHAN

But dad.

SENATOR WOLFE

We’ll go over this later. As you can see, even my own son can be confused… but with the right family values… together, we can be strong.

NATHAN

Dad…

SENATOR WOLFE

I love my son. But what the tragedy that happened yesterday shows us is that being different, is not always good. Being different can be different. Being different is just not natural.

NATHAN

Dad!

SENATOR WOLFE

You are not gay!

NATHAN

But…

SENATOR WOLFE

You’re not. I said you’re not.

I will not hear anything…

Song #21: Love Above

NATASHA

What are y’ gonna place today
Above the power of your love?

What are y’ gonna take today
Above the power of your love?

NATHAN

Natasha?

NATASHA

Yes… some folks are crazy
and others are lazy
and others just don’t give a damn

ENSEMBLE

That’s right

NATASHA

And what often amazes
Is how some people are spacey
While others just live out a scam

But while your pointing your fingers
With your war mongering bringers
And your holey logic thinkers…
And you’re judging all gays
With your hypocritical ways
Only caring about talk of some money…

Well, I’m asking you now
I’m asking you clear
Because I’m sick of it now
Sick of hate and fear...

What are you gonna place today
Above the power of your love?

What are you gonna take today
Above the power of your love?

Could you just try to place love above
The sins of your bigotry

pleas… p-p-p please

Could you just try to place love above
The nature of your greed

pleas… p-p-p please

Could you just try to place love above
Your 1st grade philosophies
pleas… p-p-p please

Cause can’t you see him
Can’t you feel him?
Don’t you know him?
Can’t you hear him?
When he’s bleeeeeeeeeeeeeediiiiiiiiiiiiiiing…… [fast, harsh music]

Do you hear what he’s saying
Or see the price that he’s paying
When he’s listening to your crap.

When some people are dying
And others are crying
Whether emotionally or through your crap

And we’re forced to entertain
While your causing more pain
Spillin’ suicide on your lap

And what do we get in response?
Is that, well, you’ve been ensconced
To a vacant face and Rush Limbauuuuuuuuuuuuuuuugh (fast, harsh music) (screaming)

For the life of me…
Why your bigotry
What’s your problem with all gays?

For the life of me…
Can’t you bloody see
That you’re driving him insane?

‘Cause he really cares
About the views that you share
Even though you come across as a Nazi

But when the pope’s a dope
And the Catholics are shit
And you pricks talk of God
But throw demonic spit
I can see the source
But, hell, there’s a better course…

[music] [music] [in crescendo]

[with an energy that would make even the pope tremble]

NATASHA

Let’s place love above
Traditional values

Let’s place love above
The people we fear

Let’s place love above
When hope seems impossible

Let’s place love above
Even thoughts of career

NATASHA and NATHAN

Let’s place love above
The forces of bigotry

Let’s place love above
The fears that are in here [pointing to heads]

Let’s place love above
Our silly traditions

Let’s place love above
And love those most dear

NATASHA, NATHAN, ENSEMBLE #2

Let’s place love above
The fences we’re building (music)

NATASHA, NATHAN, ENSEMBLE #2, ENSEMBLE #3

Let’s place love above
And make it our song (music)

NATASHA, NATHAN, ENSEMBLE #2, ENSEMBLE #3, ENSEMBLE #1

Let’s place love above
Our own silly vanities (music)

NATASHA, NATHAN, ENSEMBLE #2, ENSEMBLE #3, ENSEMBLE #1, ENSEMBLE #5

Let’ place love above
When we are not strong (music)

NATASHA, NATHAN, ENSEMBLE #2, ENSEMBLE #3, ENSEMBLE #1, ENSEMBLE #5, ENSEMBLE #1

Let’s place love above
When love is inside us (music)

Ohhh…Let’s place love above
So that all can belong (music)

NATHAN

‘Cause a man cannot escape
When he looks across our landscape
And sees the rhetoric of fear
Above the power of love

ENSEMBLE

Noooooooooo!

NATASHA

And a woman cannot escape
When she looks across our landscape
And sees the rhetoric of fear
Above the power of love

So I ask you once again,
what are you gonna place
today, above the power of your love?

Yes, I really wanna know
How are you gonna waste
When you refuse to have the taste
Of your own God-given love? (music)

NATHAN

‘Cause it’s easy for me to see
That we can finally be happy
If we place the power of love
Above the power of all

ENSEMBLE

Yes, it’s easy for us to see
That we can all be quite happy
If we place the power of love
Above the power of all

(Music)

(Music) (Music) (Music)

NATHAN

That’s all I’m asking of you, you see
Is to love all humanity
And to place the power of love
Above the power of all.

“Love your son” I beg,
Even if I be gay, or just
Stop, because you’re
not showing love at all.

[NATHAN collapses in tears] [NATASHA grabs him and brings him up]

[music]
[music]

NATHAN, NATASHA, AND ENEMBLE

Because there’s beauty in our dance
And there’s love in our romance
And all we really need is your acceptance

Yes, there’s beauty in our dance
And there’s love in our romance
And all we really need is your acceptance

Oh there’s beauty in our dance
And there’s love in our romance

And all we really need

NATASHA

All we really need

NATHAN and NATASHA and ENSEMBLE

All we really need, we really need, we really need…

Is your acceptance [NATHAN in front}

[In Shock, SENATOR WOLFE departs the stage… the lights go out]

[At the hospital]

NATHAN

Hey Jake, how are you feeling?

JACOB

Depends… who is that?

NATHAN

Oh yes… this is Natasha.

NATASHA

Hi.

JACOB

I’ve been in the hospital one day and you decide to go straight on me.

NATHAN

No, I…

JACOB

I’m kidding. C’mon give me a hug.

Ouch ouch ouch ouch… I’m kidding…

JACOB

Kiss. [Small kiss]

So what brings you here, Natasha?

NATHAN

She helped me out at the rally.

JACOB

No way, you went to the Pope’s rally…

NATASHA

Yeah, we practically drove the Senator from the stage.

JACOB

Oh…How is that going?

NATHAN

Not sure yet.

JACOB

So what compelled you to go to the rally? [to NATASHA]

NATASHA

Love.

JACOB

Uh oh.

NATASHA

No not like that.

What I realized, from you two actually, is what love is. My whole life I thought it was just, well, sex. Yes, well when I was really young it was about princes. But then reality… and it was about sex… especially when marriage hit… well, then it was just… well, not much of anything…

JACOB

I’m sorry.

NATASHA

Don’t be.

Song #22: Love’s Serenity

NATASHA

When I was younger
My life was tragic
This once romantic
On my own Titanic
I had these friends
I lost those friends
Within the movies
Love never ends
But it did
It does
Love ends
And when I gave up
On…
My Love
That’s when I lost
The best
Of me

I
I hated life
I hated men
I hated me

I
Could not see
Any beauty
This side of me

I
Would exercise
Day and night
Just to remove the stains from
My
These eyes of sadness
Those wells of madness
That darkness without
Any
Light
‘Cause I was dying
From all that crying
I was dying
Because I had
Lost
Oh I had lost
All Hope
My Light
And so
When I lost
My Love
That’s when
I lost the
Best of Me

(music)

In so much anger
And with a stranger
He did not know me
I did not know me
But with each tear
I had to fear me
For what’s a woman
Without a husband
And this cage
That awful cage
Oh it held
The worst
Of me

[music]

I cried for freedom
I cried for freedom
But I was so dumb
Caught in his kingdom
I cried for freedom
I cried for freeeeee-dom

And then I saw
You two
And your love
And I remembered
That best of me

[music]

Ain’t life fantastic?
Ain’t life fantastic?
When who you are
Is not just plastic
He never knew me
He saw knew me
And then those men
Who nightly screwed me
I was a manic
In a panic
The Titanic
But when I surrendered
To true love’s
Serenity
That’s when I found
The best of me

For it’s inside me
Yes, just inside me
No it’s not sex, or
That man beside me
But it is freeedom
Yes, it is freeeedom

Love
That love you share
Well, it’s also the best of me

For love is comfort
And love is trusting
But most of all
It is freeeedom

And, sure, it’s attachment
But the type that makes us free

And when I surrendered
To love’s
Serenity
That’s when
I found
The best
Of meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

[Kisses and hugs]

[Scene change]
---

[Senator Wolfe alone]

SENATOR WOLFE

Oh God, why did he have to be gay? Couldn’t he have been anything else? Like Jewish? Even Muslim? I would have maybe been okay with that. But gay, it’s just weird… How do they even… do it…

Song #23: Fear of the Mirror

ENSEMBLE [from backstage--- as conscience]

It’s the fear of the mirror
When you look in those eyes

SENATOR WOLFE

I know… let him go his own path
But does that path have to be so different

ENSEMBLE

It’s the fear of the mirror
Never comes as a surprise

SENATOR WOLFE

And why did it have to be so close to the election?
Couldn’t this have come at a better time?

ENSEMBLE

It’s the fear of the mirror
It ain’t tellin you no lies

SENATOR WOLFE

Yes, I love him
But does love have to include acceptance?

ENSEMBLE

It’s the fear of the mirror
And the glare in the mirror’s eyes!

SENATOR WOLFE

Okay God, I get it. Thank you, I get it.

--

[SCENE CHANGE] [Senator Wolfe at the Podium] [NATHAN, JACOB, and NATASHA by his side]

DAD (formerly known as SENATOR WOLFE)

Today, we welcome the Pope to our great state. And with my own election just a week away, I wanted to clear up a certain disagreement I have with his holiness. I believe that love and family are the most important things that any man can have, and on these two counts, I count myself as one of the luckiest men in the world. With that said, I have for too long let fear get the best of me. But as my son has recently shown me, just as fear builds when we suppress it, so too, does courage build when we express it. [pause]

I want to apologize to everyone who is gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgendered. I have always stood for people’s freedom to do with their money what they choose, but I have stood silent, as we as a society have denied people’s ability to love whom they choose. Today, I want to say, love is love is love. This isn’t about politics, but about the love I have for my son, the love he has for his partner, and the love we must have for all humanity, despite our differences. If you elect me on Tuesday, I promise stand for love, because it’s the right thing to do. That’s all. Thank you.

NATHAN

Thanks dad.

NATASHA

Senator, do you still think you’ll win, Tuesday?

DAD

I don’t know, but there are more important things in life.

JACOB

Thank you, sir. Thank you.

DAD

No, thank you. Really, thank all of you.

Song #24: Elope with Hope

NATASHA

The news is playing with the radio on
In New York a murder, maybe war in Iran
My ex-boyfriend is gay, and my husband is gone
And I have no friends, except for you and your man
But this ain’t no time for me to sing my swan
For I’ve eloped with hope
And we are gonna go far

Oh I’ve eloped with hope
And we are gonna go far

The record’s playing with an old time saying
Just be living life or be decaying
Don’t be waiting, when you can be changing
Just be yourself, ain’t that the saying
And this new found freedom has got me swaying
To the musical beat
Of celebrating
And on this day we will all be praying
To the newest prayer
Thank you God for swaying

For I’ve eloped with hope
And we are gonna go far

Oh I’ve eloped with hope
And we are gonna go far

NATHAN

Thank you, Natasha
For being my friend
I know it’s not easy
With the things I did
But I want you to know
You can always count on me
Because I know who I am now
And your love has helped me

For this life is tough
It sure ain’t easy
Just finding myself
Well, it drove me crazy
But one thing’s for sure
And this I want to tell thee
Every time you smile
It always thrills me

As the radio’s on
But there’s hope in it
For friends like you
Keep my spirit lit
And Jake and I
We have battled through it
And I love my dad
Although an elephant
And yes it’s clear
I’m also married to it

For I’ve eloped with hope
And we are gonna go far

Oh I’ve eloped with hope
And we are gonna go far

JACOB

Hello, I’m Jake
I’m your favorite jaywalker
Am I a smooth criminal
Or just your favorite talker
I love you all
It’s my only true state
For this love thing
Well, it’s my favorite trait

I’ve been beaten
Perhaps you thought I was dead
But how could I be dead
When I have such a strong head
But love, you know,
Is the only true road
The one I chose
So long ago [Embraces Nathan]
And to this day, it is still true…

NATHAN and JACOB

That we’ve eloped with hope
And we are gonna go far

That we’ve eloped with hope
And we are gonna go far

DAD

Sure, I’m the dad
Your least favorite, the villain
But you know I’m not
Just lost in tradition
For my son, I know
Is more important to me
Than all the votes in the world
He means the world to me

And my love for him
Has shown me the way
That love is meant for all
Both straight and gay
And I just wanted to say
I love you today

NATHAN

I love you too

DAD

And always [They embrace]

NATHAN and DAD

For we’ve eloped with hope
And we are gonna go far

Ohhhh we’ve eloped with hope
And we are gonna go far

JACOB

Oooooo yeah

ALL [Natasha stretches and embellishes the oh]

We’ve eloped with hooooooope
And we are gonna go far

[Quicken up the music--- bring out the full cast]

We say nope to the pope
There’s a new way to cope
And we elope with hope
We elope with hope

We say nope to the scope
That’s too narrow for hope
And we elope with hope
We elope with hope

We elope
We elope
We elop-a with hope

NATHAN

5-4-3-2
Goodbye misanthro-popes

We elope
We elope
We elopa- with hope

NATASHA

5-4-3-2
There’s a new way to hope

ENSEMBLE #1

For God’s scope
Is a kaleidoscope

ALL

Every sister
Every brother!

ENSEMBLE #2

For God’s scope
Is a kaleidoscope

ALL

Tan, White, Black
Or even Purple Taupe!

ENSEMBLE #3

For God’s scope
Is a kaleidoscope

ALL

Love each other
Or just be a dope!

ENSEMBLE #4

For God’s scope
Is a kaleidoscope

ALL

With every color
There’s a new way to hope!

ENSEMBLE #1

We Elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope

ALL

We elope with hope
We elope with hope

ENSEMBLE #2

We Elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope

ALL

We elope with hope
We elope with hope!

ENSEMBLE #5

We Elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope

ALL

We elope with hope
We elope with hope!

ENSEMBLE #4

We Elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope
We elope with hope
Oh we elope with hope

ENSEMBLE #2

Every sister
Every brother!

ALL

Elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope

ENSEMBLE #3

Every brother
From every color!

ALL

Elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope

NATHAN

For the new religion
Is the old religion
Just love us all
For we’re all God’s children

JACOB

Whether straight or gay
Or young or old
Or maybe even both
If you are so bold

NATASHA

There’s this golden rule
Or so I’ve been told
Just love thy neighbor
With all your soul

ALL together

And if you can’t handle it
Then just take your shit
And leave us alone
You fucking hypocrites!

DAD

We elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope

ALL

We elope with hope
We elope with hope

DAD

We elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope

ALL

We elope with hope
We elope with hope

DAD

We elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope

ALL

We elope with hope
We elope with hope

DAD

We elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope

ALL

Thank you God
For the best way to hope

ENSEMBLE #1

When love’s around
No microscopes

ALL

Just elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope

ENSEMBLE #2

When love’s around
No Misanthropopes

ALL

Just elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope

JACOB

When’s love’s around
Just go for broke
And eloooooope

ALL [in crescendo]

Elope
Elope
With hope

Elope
Elope
Elope
With hope

Elope
Elope
Elope
With hope

Elope
Elope
Elope
With hope

Elope
Elope
Elope
With hope

Elope
Elope
Elope
With hope

Elope
Elope
Elope
With hope

Elope
Elope
Elope
With hope

Elope
Elope
Elope
With hope

Elope
Elope
Elope
With hope

Elope
Elope
Elope
With hope

Elope
Elope
Elope
With hope

Elope
Elope
Elope
With hope!

NATASHA

For Love is God
And God is Love

DAD

For everyone

Musical flurry

ALL

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa------ Meeeeeeeeeeeeen

(musical end)

NATHAN

Thank you!!!!

NATASHA

We love you! All of you!

(END)

[Hopefully, there is audience applause--- if so, give following encore]

Song #25 Love

NATHAN

All my world
All my life
Can be summed and drummed
In just a word

All my pain
All my strife
I have learned to face
With just a word

JACOB [enters] and NATHAN

Love!
Is just a word
It’s our whole world
In just a word

Love!
Is just a word
It is the harmony
That defeats the harm in we

NATASHA [enter] & JACOB & NATHAN

Love!
Is just a word
It’s our whole world
In just a word

Love!
Is just a word
It is the harmony
That defeats the harm in we

ALL [enter]

Because there’s beauty in our dance
And there’s love in our romance
And all we really need is your acceptance

Yes, there’s beauty in our dance
And there’s love in our romance
And all we really need is your acceptance

Oh there’s beauty in our dance
And love in our romance
And all we really need
All we really need
All we really neeeeeeeed

NATHAN and JACOB

Is your acceptance.

[End--- Final--- Take bows]

"The Animals" (a musical) Plot Summary

2010-06-13T17:33:00.000-07:00

The Animals (a musical)

By Peyton Charles Ware

Bare Bones Cast (9):

Nathaniel Wolfe: Protagonist, Son of Senator, Shy, Sexually Confused
Sara/ Natasha Fox: Sexy, Attracted to Nathaniel, Married,
Jacob Wilde: Bi-sexual, Self-aware, Co-worker of Nathan's at Zoo
Edward Wolfe: United States Senator, Father to Nathan Wolfe

Male Ensemble 1: Hippo 1, Assist on “Pope”, Backup on Group numbers
Male Ensemble 3: Cuttlefish, Backup on Group Numbers,
Male Ensemble 5: Hippo 2, Conservative boy,
Female Ensemble 2: Assist on “Criminal Charge”, Backup on Group Numbers,
Female Ensemble 4: Assist on Criminal Charge, Backup on Group Numbers,

ACT 1:

The plot opens with Senator Edward Wolfe giving a speech during the Zoo’s Annual Dance Party. He is celebrating his son Nathaniel’s position at the Zoo and the Pope’s upcoming visit. At the conclusion of his speech, the Zoo’s dance party begins--- “It’s Just the Manual to be the Animal”. Nathaniel seems out of place during the party. He is invited by Jacob Wilde, a coworker, to dance but Nathan declines. Sara makes her entrance... singing “Youth I have It”, and seducing just about every guy on the stage (and audience). Nathaniel, alone and pathetic, engages in a moment of self-pity: “Sometimes I’m Alone Like the Lone Wolf”. Sara takes an interest in Nathan and slips him her number. He is overjoyed, but Jacob isn’t as happy. Jacob sings “JayWalker”.

Nathaniel and Sara are together on an intimate date… She teases his ridiculous, conservative demeanor… in response he sings “I Don’t Wanna Be Rude, But I think you’re Cute”… She thinks this is rather cute, but raises the stakes with “I Want So much to Touch You” which becomes a steamy duet… Passionate love making ensues…

Following the passionate evening, Nathaniel and Sara walk into Jacob Wilde. He sings “Love is the Only Thing that Turns Me On ... As Jacob leaves, Nathaniel professes his love for Sara “You Can Count On Me”. Once she leaves, Nathan is informed that Sara is married and named Natasha: “Miss Manipulative”. Enraged, Nathaniel confronts Sara “I had a kiss for the Miss” and leaves her abruptly. The stage darkens and Sara sings about how love is a cock of shit in the stormy dance number “Love is a Criminal Charge”.

Devastated, Nathaniel tries to find comfort at the Zoo where he finds Jacob. Instead of comfort, he comes to the realization he’s gay. Nathan freaks out… He collapses in the zoo… and in a bizarre dream state reminiscent of a twisted Alice in Wonderland, dancing zoo animals start to hit on him… a sexy Tigress “This girl is a tiger”, two gay hippos “Get Hippo Down”, and a bi-sexual Cuttlefish “Cuddle with the Cuttlefish”… (yes… this is meant to be rather comedic). At the point of breakdown, Jacob finally finds Nathaniel and comforts him, revealing his love for the poor bloke. “You’re Okay”

Act 2

After a brief family values speech by Senator Wolfe, the second Act opens with the sexy dance number “The Action of Passion”. The scene then changes to Natasha who is not happy with her husband--- “I Want Something More Today” --- she decides to leave him. Nathan discusses with Jacob the nature of his sexuality, describing how the hardest thing to determine is “who I am”. He follows with “Unlocked the box". Nathan decides it’s time to confront his father.

Nathan tries to “come out of the closet” to his father. Just when he is about to reveal his sexuality, Natasha arrives to express her love for Nathan. During this comedy, Nathan finally opens up that he is gay. His father storms out-- stating that Nathan must think things over if he wants to remain his son. Natasha also leaves, devastated… Nathan and Jacob lament their fate… “The World is Just a Zoo”. Natasha witnesses this scene.

Jacob and Nathan show up to the Senator’s rally for the pope “I am the Pope”...Jacob takes it too far with an insecure dude and is nearly beaten to death…

Senator Wolfe gives a speech to a crowd regarding the tragedy at his previous rally. Nate, distressed by the speech, confronts his father. Senator Wolfe proceeds to bludgeon his son with words, telling him he can’t be gay. Natasha comes to Nathan’s rescue. Natasha leads the full cast sans Jacob in the climax of the musical: “Let’s Place Love Above”. Senator Wolfe exits, clearly shaken.

The audience finds out Jacob is still alive. Nathan and Natasha meet him at the hospital. Natasha sings about what she’s learned from love: “Love’s Serenity”.

Alone, Senator Wolfe comes to grips with what he must do and also what he’s learned from love: “Fear of the Mirror”.

Senator Wolfe gives a speech stating that he is for gay rights and love. Everyone rejoices... “Elope with Hope” . As an encore, the full cast sings “Love"--- because that’s what it’s all about. :-)

Song Listing:

Act 1:

1) The Manual to be the Animal--- Full Ensemble
2) Youth I Have It, I’m Gonna Use It--- Sara
3) Sometimes I’m Alone Like the Lone Wolf--- Nathan
4) JayWalker--- Jacob
5) I Don’t Wanna Be rude--- Nathan
6) I Want So Much To Touch You--- Sara and Nathan
7) Love is the Only Thing That Turns Me On--- Jacob
8) You Can Count On Me--- Nathan
9) Miss Manipulative--- Ensemble
10) I Had a Kiss For the Miss--- Nathan and Sara
11) Love Is a Criminal Charge--- Sara/Natasha and Female Ensemble
12) This Girl is a Tiger--- Female Ensemble 2
13) Hip Hippo Down—Male Ensemble 1 and 3
14) Cuddle with the Cuttlefish—Male Ensemble 5
15) You’re okay--- Jacob

Act 2:

16) The Action of Passion--- Ensemble (Jacob and Nathan in background)
17) I Want Something More Today--- Natasha
18) Unlocked the Box--- Nathan
19) The World is Just a Zoo--- Jacob and Nathan
20) I am the Pope--- Jacob , Nathan and Ensemble
21) Let’s Place Love Above— Natasha, Nathan, and Ensemble
22) Love’s Serenity--- Natasha
23) Fear of the Mirror--- Ensemble
24) Elope with Hope—Full Cast
25) Love--- Full Cast

Avatar!

2010-06-13T16:41:00.001-07:00

My dad recently got me a free month subscription to Netflix. I have used it mostly to watch the television series "Avatar", perhaps my favorite television series of all time. If you love Miyazaki films--- I recommend "Castle in the Sky", "Howl's Moving Castle", "Princess Mononoke", "Spirited Away", "Nausicaa: Valley of the Wind"--- just to start--- then you MUST see this series. The blend of goofiness, strong characters, and love that goes into this series is amazing. I HIGHLY recommend it. I can identify with the characters, they are all great, and well, I just really like this show--- who knew a kids' show could get me teary eyed... :-) I'm going to watch another episode after this series of posts. I think this series will be around for a long time... just like the Disney animation I grew up on.

M. Night Shyamalan is making "Avatar" into a movie coming out July 2nd. I must admit I really disliked the last two movies I saw by him: "The Village" and "Lady in the Water"... so he better not mess this up!!! Nonetheless, I will certainly see the film... here's the trailer to the upcoming film version: And definitely see the show--- or when you have kids--- have them see the show!!! It really is great (in my humble opinion). :-P

Somewhere Out There

2010-05-22T15:48:00.000-07:00

"Somewhere Out There" by the great James Horner ("Titanic"), Barry Mann, and Cynthia Weil. From the adorable movie "An American Tail"

A Lesson

2010-05-22T11:37:00.000-07:00

Imprints on the whiteboard
Markers on the floor
Empty sneakers, open books
No crayons in that drawer!

Laughter in the hallway
But stubborn by the book
What's the matter? What's this word?
He gives me that "book" look.

The future is not sleeping
His energy has no brakes
But when it comes to words or math
Play games
For tutor's sake!

Which of these 26 letters...

2010-05-16T11:24:00.000-07:00

I am grateful to the two new followers of this blog. I do not know who you are, but the support is sincerely appreciated (really, truly). I would never forgive myself if I didn't finish the musical, but it is nice to know somebody out there likes my work. Thank you.

I hope you like this song--- I think it's one of my better ones, though sad. It's meant as a piano solo.

-Peyton

Which of these 26 letters

Which of these 26 letters
And 88 notes
Could ever express
How much I love you

Which of these 26 letters
And 88 notes
Could ever impress
How much I care

You know I’m sorry I hurt you
I pressed every button
But now I’m here
On the keys

Trying to write you a love song
To make it all better
With every note
Asking please

You know I’m sorry I hurt you
I’m sorry I need you
But at a moment like this
You’re all I feel

When there are so many questions
With too little notes
I know nothing at all
But this is real

Which of these 26 letters
And 88 notes
Could ever express
How much I love you

Which of these 26 letters
And 88 notes
Could ever impress
How much I care

It’s a lonely profession
Being a mad man
And I’ll agree
That’s what I am

To ever suggest you
Were one to forget, well,
That wasn’t a well
Thought out plan

You are my sun
And my rainbow
My light in the night
You’re everything
I cannot control

And though I’m sorry I hurt you
I’m sorry I need you
Your beauty is etched
Into my soul

And now I’m here on the keyboard
Now banging the keys
Lost because
You are not here

My heart is strung into letters
And bled into notes
Every word
Writ with those tears

Which of these 26 letters
And 88 notes
Could ever express
How much I love you

Which of these 26 letters
And 88 notes
Could ever impress
How much I care

These words may flow as a river
These notes may tap as rain
But I’m now alone
With just your smile

You are my passion
My spirit, and every note screams it
This energy
How I love you

I love your popcorn cheeks
Those wings in your hair
The way that you look
In disguise

And though I know you don’t know it
That you may not feel it
This poor man’s voice
Is in your eyes

And so I’m trying to scream it
I’m trying to beam it
I’m trying to get you back to me
And though I know it is useless
I know that I’m useless
I hate getting used
To just these keys

Which of these 26 letters
And 88 notes
Could show you the truth
Of my heart

Which of these 26 letters
And 88 notes
Could transform this pain
Into some art

And now I’ll end without sending
You any more pain
I’ll end with just
These few notes

I have to thank you
For being
My friend
I love you
And that will not end

Which of these 26 letters
And 88 notes
Did ever express
How much I’m sorry

Which of these 26 letters
And 88 notes
Did ever address you
As my one

[end]

To the Stars

2010-05-12T17:22:00.000-07:00

I love movie music :-P From the movie "DragonHeart", composed by Randy Edelman--- entitled "To the Stars"

Pure Imagination

2010-05-04T21:17:00.000-07:00

From Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory... I love this song.

The Animals (a musical)--- Act 1

2010-05-04T21:01:00.000-07:00

Ok, so this is the first draft of Act 1 of my musical, "The Animals". Some brief comments: 1) It's a musical for adults similar to Cabaret or Chicago-- read with that in mind 2) The formatting on a blog is really not ideal, if anyone really wants to read it, I could send it in MS Word Format. For those who have offered their support, thank you... especially, my sisters... I hope to get you Act 2 in the near future. Comments are always appreciated (though please remember this is just the first Act!!!) -P

-------------------------

The Animals

Book and lyrics by Peyton Charles Ware

[The musical opens at a Dance Party at a Zoo]

SENATOR WOLFE

Ladies, gentlemen, and fellow party animals. It is my great honor to be here tonight for the Zoo’s Annual Charity Dance Party. For 17 years, most of you have known me as your United States Senator, but one lucky man among you, for 27 long years, has had the unique distinction of calling me “dad”. Nathan, where are you, come up here and give your dad a bear hug.

[NATHAN enters stage while SENATOR WOLFE and ENSEMBLE clap. He stands next to SENATOR WOLFE and gets a one armed hug]

I am so proud to be able to serve this great state, I am so proud of some of the accomplishments that we, together, have achieved over the past 17 years, but what I am most proud of, is this young man, my son, who only one month ago, took his passion for animals, for education, for the environment, and made it into a career at what I believe is the finest zoo in all of America.

[ENSEMBLE claps]

With his holiness, the pope, coming to visit this zoo in just five short months, let us remember the family values of honesty, of trust, of integrity, and love, that have kept my son and I so close for 27 amazing years, and are, in my mind, at the core of what makes America the greatest nation in the entire world. I know I am in good company when I say this, but it’s our core values that separate us from these caged animals here, and it’s our core values that will keep America the greatest country in the world. I know you are in the best of hands with my son here in your Education Department, and when the world is watching, I know you will make our great state proud, and show the pope, and the world, not only what quality animals we have here, but also what quality people. God bless you, and without further ado… let the party begin.

[The stage brightens, revealing a company of scantily clad, sexy young people in dance position. Dancing ensues]

Song #1: The Manual to be The Animal

ENSEMBLE

It's just the manual
To be the animal
And when I feel it
I want to be it... be it...be it...

It's just the manual
To be the animal
And when I feel it
I want to be it... be it.

ENSEMBLE #1

I'm thinkin' heaven knows
You take off all those clothes
You lookin' mighty fine
I wanna make y' mine

That’s when I use my eyes
To send y' all those lies
Because what is love
But what my eyes define

So when I’m at the club
And I just want some love
I look for décolleté
Because that means some play

That's when I use the booze
To get us both so loose
What did my sensei say?
But to let those senses play!

ENSEMBLE

He’s just the manual
To be the animal
And when he feels it

ENSEMBLE #1

I want to be it... be it.

ENSEMBLE

He’s just the manual
To be the animal
And when he feels it
He wants to be it... be it... be it...

ENSEMBLE #2

All y' want some love
And I'm like MJ's glove
Meanin' I'm so fly
My dancin' makes 'em cry

For all the men just long
For the girl that makes ‘em long
For what they see in me
Makes em’ wet their briefs

For while I’m on the floor
What I’m asking for
Is all the finest moves
And then I’ll show ‘em more

For even the dullest dudes
Make me wet when nude
For what a girl desires
Is a man whose ass inspires

ENSEMBLE

She’s just the manual
To be the animal
And when she sees it

ENSEMBLE #2

I want to free it, free it, free it

ENSEMBLE

She’s just the manual
To be the animal
And when she feels him

ENSEMBLE #2

I want to feel it... feel it.

ENSEMBLE #3

What hotties want the most
Is my body oh so close
'Cause what they feel in me
Is just a bull in heat

So when I'm on the floor
The ladies want some more
And I take that desire
And turn it into fire

'Cause I'm the U.S.S.
Mr. Prometheus
Goin’ down below
Until her cheeks aglow

For what my body’s for
Is to cause a roar
In her I trust
That’s what this man is for

ENSEMBLE

Id's just the manual
To be the animal
And when he feels id

ENSEMBLE #3

I want to be id, be id.

ENSEMBLE

Id's just the manual
To be the animal
And when he feels id
He wants to be it… be it… be it

ENSEMBLE #4

Hello I’m Tiffany
And my philosophy
Is really deep
That’s deep inside of me

For what I love to do
Is just get close to you
And shake you up
Until your mind is blue

For when I want some love
I want it like a drug
And that drug is stiff
If it’s gonna come

For I’m just a girl
Who wants you in my world
For this body chasm
Is built for an orgasm

ENSEMBLE

She’s just the manual

ENSEMBLE #4

Oooh

ENSEMBLE

To be the animal

ENSEMBLE #4

Eeeeh

ENSEMBLE

And when she wants you

ENSEMBLE #4

I’m gonna get you, get you

ENSEMBLE

She just the manual
To be animal
And when she feels it

ENSEMBLE #4

I’m gonna be it, be it, be it.

ENSEMBLE #5

Hello, my name is Pan
You can call me Peter Pan
And you may understand
In Never-ever land

'Cause tonight y' gonna fly
Wit' dust b'tween y' thighs
That's right, the second star
Is hidden deep inside

So when y' go with me
Oh babe, y' gonna see
That babe, these Captain Hooks
Are driven by y' looks

So babe, now here's the key
All sweet and syrupy
And there's no place to hide
When this animal's let loose inside

ENSEMBLE [crawling toward audience]

We’re just the manuals
To be the animals

We’re just the manuals
To be the animals

We’re just the manuals
To be the animals

We’re just the manuals
To be the animals

[ENSEMBLE Up and dancing]

We’re just the animals
Within you animals
And though you hide us
You can’t deny us, eye us, eye us

We’re just the animals
Within you animals
And though you hide us
You know you want us, you want us

ENSEMBLE #1

Ahhhhhhwhoooooooooo's the animal...

ENSEMBLE #3

Oh I’m the animal

ENSEMBLE #2

Ahhhhhhwhoooooooooo's the animal...

ENSEMBLE #4

Oh I’m the animal

ENSEMBLE #5

Ahhhhhhwhoooooooooo's the animal...

ENSEMBLE

You’re all the animals.

ENSEMBLE #1

Ahhhhhhwhoooooooooo's the animal...

ENSEMBLE

It’s just the manual
To be the animal
And when we feel it
We want to be it… be it… be it

It’s just the manual
To be the animal
And when we feel it
We want to be it… be it… be it

[Passionate dancing ensues]

ENSEMBLE #1

Id

ENSEMBLE #2

Id

ENSEMBLE #3

Id

ENSEMBLE #4

Id

ENSEMBLE #5

Id

ENSEMBLE

It’s just the manual

--------------------------

SENATOR WOLFE

Son, look at all those young people on the dance floor. Surely, a man like yourself, should be able to find a young lady out here.

NATHAN

Dad...

SENATOR WOLFE

I’m just saying. Your mother and I really love you and want what’s best for you…

NATHAN

Dad...

SENATOR WOLFE

Ok. I understand. Remember to call your mother?

NATHAN

Yes Dad.

SENATOR WOLFE

Alright. I Love you.

NATHAN

I love you too.

[SENATOR WOLFE exits… NATHAN walks across stage]

NATHAN

Oh Lord

[JACOB enters]

JACOB

Hey Nathan, that was an interesting speech your father gave.

NATHAN

Yeah, I guess.

JACOB

So… are you going to dance tonight?

NATHAN

Oh… um… no… I don’t think so.

JACOB

Oh, c’mon…

NATHAN

I’m not like, well, you know, I just don’t dance.

JACOB

Well, we could do some modern art then… you stand in one place. And I dance around you.

NATHAN

Well… thanks… but ummm… um no… I think I’m just gonna take it easy tonight…

JACOB

Really, no one out here interests you?

NATHAN

Ummm…

[SARA enters]

Song #2: Youth… I’m Gonna Use It

SARA

Come on ladies
Come on men
Here comes the main attraction
Can I hear an Amen

ENSEMBLE

A--- Men

SARA

I have lots of style
And I’m built for sex
So impress me now
Ok, move those pecs

Youth
I have it
I’m gonna use it
Youth
I have it
I’m gonna use it
Youth
I have it
I’m gonna use it
Tonight I’m gonna
Use it on you.

Tonight I’m gonna
Use it on you.

Go on impress me
Because I’m feelin’ sexy
I’m a holy roller
I’m a swingin’ sex bomb
And with those eyes
Just you try to undress me
Because I’m gonna use thee
With great aplomb

I have a slit
Right along this thigh
And I have a slit
Right between these thighs
I have slits
Right within these eyes
For yeah, babes,
I’m a bit feline.

ENSEMBLE

Youth
She has it
She’s gonna use it
Youth
She has it
She’s gonna use it
Youth
She’s has it
She’s gonna use it

SARA

Tonight I’m gonna
Use it on you.
Tonight I’m gonna
Use it on you
Tonight I’m gonna
Use it on you.

Start your swingin’
Start your singin’, babies
If you wanna impress
This sexy lady
You better bring it
You better swing it, baby
For only the best,
Will ever wet me

So yeah, open up that chest
And, yeah, pound a bit of your breast
For if you wanna be my everyday Tarzan
Then you better go where only Mars can

So, now, show me all of your moves
And, now, show me all of those steps
For my view, is that I’m only the best
And if you’re not... these just ain’t your breasts.

ENSEMBLE

Youth
She has it
She’s gonna use it
Youth
She has it
She’s gonna use it
Youth
She has it
She’s gonna use it

SARA

Tonight, I’m gonna
Use it on you
Tonight, I’m gonna
Use it on you
Tonight, I’m gonna
Use it on you

SARA

Oh I’m a lady
So you call me crazy
Because y’ can’t explain
Passion in a lady
And I am
One passionate soul
And tonight, boys,
I want your egg rolls

For I have
A certain aesthetic
I want him
To be strong, athletic
And, sometimes
I want him

[sees NATHAN]

Pathetic

And if you have this
You might just get this

So if
If you wanna impress me
So if
If you wanna to possess me
So if
If you wanna arrest me
Well, sinners,
There’s that test to wet me
And I’m gonna
Well, I’m gonna arrest thee
And I’m gonna
Well, I’ve already impressed thee
So I’m gonna
So I’m gonna possess thee
If I wanna
Or you’re in the trash heap

So bring it
C’mon bring it, babies
For I be... a sexy lady
And I wanna, wanna man to please me
So your moves, well they better seize me,

So, now, don’t give me no prance
For I want.... a special kind of dance
For I have youth, and I’m gonna use it
I’m gonna move it, like a fire to music

SARA ENSEMBLE

Youth Youth
I have it She has it
I’m gonna use it She’s gonna use it
Youth Youth
I have it She has it
I’m gonna use it She’s gonna use it
Youth Youth
I have it She has it
I’m gonna use it She’s gonna use it
Tonight I’m gonna Tonight, she’s gonna
Use it on you. Use it on you.
Tonight I’m gonna Tonight, she’s gonna
Use it on you Use it on you
Tonight, I’m gonna Tonight, she’s gonna

Use it on you

[NATHAN has walked off alone to the side]

NATHAN

Oy… so many beautiful women?
But none of them interested in me
What am I to do, God?
What am I to do?

Song #3 Alone Like The Lone Wolf

Tonight I’m alone
While everyone is at the party
Alone is my own home
I have to tell my dad I’m sorry

I’m just not meant
For this party atmosphere
Yes, I want true love
But must it come from lots of beer

I call to the moon
And ask him where is my true love?
Oh how I am so lonely
God, do I ask you too much?

I just want somebody
Someone special I can hold
God, please find this one
Before my passion has gone cold

Sometimes I’m alone
Like the lone wolf
No matter where I roam
It’s my own truth
No matter how I howl
At the sight of the moon
Emptiness surrounds
The sound of my own tune

Who am I
Oh what have I become?
Am I just a martyr
Of my own romantic kingdom?
I just need a body
Someone special I can hold
Lookin’ for that one
Let my destiny unfold

Talkin’ in my mind
Always talkin’ in this mind
Imagining that one
One that’s out for me to find
I think I can see her
She is perfect, she is fair
With that curvaceous body
And some soft and comfy, hair

I know there is destiny
It’s me and it is she
Locked in a union
We fit so perfectly
I want this dream
The dream that comes from every movie
Me with a woman
Together, perfect union

But instead I sit here
Covering my tears
With a famous dad
And a momma so austere
They don’t understand
What it’s like to be a man
Who has a dream
But doesn’t stand a chance

Always, I’m alone
Like the lone wolf
No matter where I roam
It’s my own truth
No matter how I howl
At the sight of the moon
Emptiness surrounds the sound
Of my own tune

And so tonight I’ll sit
I’ll sit alone and dream
Of that dreamy woman
With kiss by movie screen
We’ll have three children
We’ll have a perfect life
We’ll be the perfect couple
Just me and perfect wife…

-----------------------------------

SARA

Hey, what are you doing out here by yourself?

NATHAN

Oh… ummm… I was just taking a break from the party.

SARA

Oh, really, do you mind if I have a seat then?

NATHAN

No, not at all.

SARA

So…

NATHAN

mmmm…

SARA

Uh huh

NATHAN

mmmm…

SARA

What’s your name?

NATHAN

Oh… Nathan… What’s yours?

SARA

Sara

NATHAN

So, Sara… what books do you like to read?

SARA

Well… my favorites are Madame Bovary, A Handful of Dust… other chick lit… you know, sometimes vampire books

NATHAN

Yeah, I think it’s good to read.

SARA

Nathan?

NATHAN

Yes?

SARA

Why haven’t you complimented me yet? Don’t you like me? Don’t you find me attractive?

NATHAN

Well, of course I do…

SARA

Well then, it’s kind of cold out here, and you’re sitting way over there… you haven’t even touched me… yet.

NATHAN

Oh… [approaches Sara] is this good?

SARA

It’s not good. But it’s better.

NATHAN

Ummm… how about now?

SARA

So you’re going to call me, right?

NATHAN

Uh… yeah, that sounds like a good idea.

SARA

Dinner, right?

NATHAN

Yeah

SARA

Intimate, your place, right?

NATHAN

Of course

SARA

I’ll be waiting…

[SARA kisses NATHAN on the cheek]

impatiently…

[SARA exits]

NATHAN

Thank you, God! Thank you, God! Hallelujah!

[NATHAN gets up and walks briskly back to the main stage]

I like her
I like her a lot
The moment I saw her
Something hit me in that spot

[With “In that spot” NATHAN’s hands first go for his groin, but then he remembers to place them near his heart]

I love her
I know she’s the one
The way that she just moved me
It was as though I felt the…
Sun

[NATHAN walks back to main floor]

JACOB

Oh, so you’ve decided to dance after all?

NATHAN

No… I have just fallen in love…

JACOB

Oh… really… who’s the lucky… one

NATHAN

Her name is Sara!

JACOB

Oh…

NATHAN

I just have to call her!

JACOB

Yeah, that’s what people do.

NATHAN

Oh shit. I didn’t get her number.

I hate me
I hate me a lot
Every time I think of me
I want to shoot me on the spot

JACOB

Wait… wait… was it that girl that followed you?

NATHAN

Yeah, that’s her!

JACOB

Maybe you could check your pocket.

NATHAN

It’s her number! Oh… Isn’t she smart! I’ll talk to you later, Jake! Enjoy the rest of the dance!

[NATHAN exits]

ENSEMBLE #3

Jake, you need to get over him… this isn’t like you.

JACOB

He’s in love…

ENSEMBLE #2

He’s a repressed, ewok, who’s in love with sentimental movies…

JACOB

Oh c’mon noq, don’t you think everyone wants to, has the right to, be in love like that, at least once?

ENSEMBLE #1

Honestly, he’s a 20 something with the emotional maturity of a 12 year old.

JACOB

No, he’s a butterfly.

ENSEMBLE #4

No Jake, you’re the butterfly.

JACOB

Oh, I’m no butterfly.

ENSEMBLE #1

Yeah, what are you then?

JACOB

[singing] I’m a Jaywalker

ENSEMBLE #1

A what?

JACOB

[singing] I’m a Jaywalker

ENSEMBLE #4

I don’t get it

JACOB

[singing] I’m a Jaywalker

ENSEMBLE #3

Ok, tell us then.

Song #4 Jaywalker

I’m a Jaywalker
Heavyweight talker

I’m a Jaywalker
Featherweight walker

I’m a Jaywalker
Beautiful stalker

For when times are impossibly hard…
There’s just some laws you have to
(mmm) (mmm)
Disregard.

A pretty boy came out in front of my yard
He said he heard I was a bit of a bard
I replied my boy that’s what I am
I’ve written songs for both the ladies and men

He said well sir I have a big issue
And I’m not sure what else there is I can do
For my times are impossibly hard
And because of that I’m really quite scarred

I said my boy there is no need for tears
Have a beer my solution is near
For whenever times are ever so hard
There’s just some laws one has to disregard

Just be
Jaywalking
No need for talking

Just be
Jaywalking
Not crying or squawking

Just be
Jaywalking
And good times you’ll be hawking

For when times are impossibly hard
There’s just some laws you have to
(mmm) (mmm)
Disregard.

He was confused
Mistreated and used
A hard-knock life
In the pants of that youth
His reality was
As hard as it long
I said “hmmm...
Can I see what is wrong?”

That pretty boy
Whose life was so hard
I grabbed his hand
To make it so less hard
We all need a lift
Now and often
God’s gift to men
Amen. Amen.

And so that night
We both broke the law
A few careful steps
Until our weapons were drawn
Peace and love
Are the holiest laws
The doors open
Until Wow! it’s less hard.

‘Cause we were
Jaywalking
Up the walls he was clawing

We were
Jaywalking
Until the neighbors were talking

We were
Jaywalking
Every night until morning

For when times are impossibly hard
There’s just some laws one has to
(mmm) (mmm)
Disregard.

That’s my life
It is free from strife
A criminal
In these pants
It’s alright
It stands strong
It stands upright
It stands for love
Both day and night.

So don’t be cruel
With your words and your laws
God gave me grace
If you knew you’d applaud
For my mission
Is not a selfish cause
There’s always two
With the applause in “awws”

And so let’s all say Amen Amen
To a scene a la men a men
For if one never crosses that street
A hard knock life is the curse he will keep

Too many of us think we have these flaws
Unaware of God’s beautiful cause
Boxed in these stupid human cupid laws
I say cross the street, don’t keep it too hard

For a soul has a sexual part
To have sex is a part of God’s art
And to deny it is to tear one apart
And that’s why I be a work of art

You see my nature, you see my style
You heard my song, I hope it makes you smile
And if you dare ever cross my street
I promise you my smile you’ll meet.

For I’m a

ENSEMBLE

Jaywalker

JACOB

Heavyweight talker

I’m a

ENSEMBLE

Jaywalker

JACOB

Featherweight walker

I’m a

ENSEMBLE

Jaywalker

JACOB

Beautiful Stalker

For when times are impossibly hard
Oh when times are impossibly hard
I say when times are impossibly hard
There’s just some laws you have to…
(mmm..) (mmm…)
Disregard.

ENSEMBLE

He’s a Jaywalker
Just moving along
Just walking to the beat
Of his own true song.

He’s a Jaywalker
Just moving along
Just walking to the beat
Of his own true song.

He’s a Jaywalker
Just moving along
Just walking to the beat
Of his own true song…

[JACOB exits] [Change of Scene]

[At Nathan’s condominium. Nathan and Sarah are sitting.]

NATHAN

So… Sarah… umm… what books do you like to read?

SARA

Ummm…

NATHAN

Oh shit, I already asked that. Sorry.

What are your favorite hobbies?

SARA

I like talking about what people are interested in.

NATHAN

Oh really?

SARA

Yes. So… what are you interested in at the moment?

NATHAN

Well, my dad’s reelection campaign is really picking up, and the cuttlefish have really been displaying a lot of…

SARA

Nathan, I am in this room with you, alone… and you’re interested in cuttlefish?

NATHAN

No, of course not! I’m interested in you.

SARA

Then show me.

NATHAN

Well, you said you liked vampires, which one is your favorite?

SARA

Are you really the dumbest man alive? Are you looking at me?

NATHAN

Well, of course.

SARA

If you’re not interested in something a little more… immediate… then vampires… I’m going to just assume you’re gay.

NATHAN

Oh….ok…

Song #5 I Don’t Wanna Be Rude

NATHAN

Well, I like your hair

SARA

Yeah?

NATHAN

And I like your shoes…

SARA

I do too

NATHAN

But what I’m really impressed
Is by your choice of dress
And how it’s a little see through

SARA

Now you’re singing.

NATHAN

And, yeah, I like your eyes

SARA

Uh huh

NATHAN

And the makeup that you use

SARA

[glares]

NATHAN

Well, how you’ve managed to harness
The very best of your chest
For a guy like me to view

So will you understand
If I ask of you
Something a bit taboo
Because I just met you
But you’re such a wonderful view…

Oh I don’t want to be rude
But I think you’re cute
So can I sing you nude?

I don’t want to be rude
But I think you’re cute
So can I sing you nude?

SARA

Ooohhh… Keep singing.

NATHAN

I like the clothes you wear
I like your underwear
For inside there are “oohs” and “ahs”
When you show that bra
You know that’s a little unfair

SARA

Much better.

NATHAN

I like the way you smile
And that way you laugh
But could I see what’s below
Would you dare to show
God’s marvelous craft

SARA

You’re getting there.

NATHAN

When I see your legs
You know that something begs
To see “what’s up”?
Like I’m saying hello
Except it’s down below

SARA

(laughs)

NATHAN

And when I touch your arms
It’s like I’m out on a farm
Being milked by cows
Well, that doesn’t work
But you give me quirks

SARA

(laughs)

NATHAN

So can you hear me say
How much I want you today
Could you give them the slip
And do a little dip
So I can see you that way?

Cause’ I don’t want to be rude
But I think you’re cute
So can I sing you nude?

Ooooo! Oooo! Oooo!

Oh I don’t want to be rude
But I think you’re cute
So can I sing you nude?

SARA

One more time

NATHAN

Oh yeah, I’d like to see
All you have beneath
Just the valleys and hills
Which like viagra pills
Are now an uplifting treat

SARA

Really?

NATHAN

No… that was just a metaphor

SARA

I mean… really?

[NATHAN covers up]

NATHAN

Sorry, please excuse
But you’re a mighty fine view
And I’m just a dude
Just a singing dude
Who really likes you.

So could you take it off
And let this poor boy scoff
At the utility of clothes
For every boy does know
How they’re much better off

Oh I don’t wanna be rude
But I think you’re cute
So can I sing you nude?!

Oooooooooooooo!

Oh I don’t wanna be rude
But I think you’re cute
So can I sing you nude?

Ooooooooooo…

Please?

------------

SARA

Nathan… you just met me, and you ask me to strip?

NATHAN

Oh… fuck… I’m so sorry, Sara. That was so inappropriate. I really, really apologize. I’ve never done anything like that before. I’m really not like that… I swear… I’m really, truly sorry.

SARA

Nathan, you’re really cute and all. But I think you could step it up a notch.

NATHAN

What?

SARA

Yeah, it’s nice to be admired. But I want something a bit more.

Song #6 I Want So Much To Touch You

I want so much to touch you
I want so much to make you smile
I want so much to feel you, feel you
I want so much to feel your spine

I want so much to taste you
To lick that tongue inside your mouth
I want so much to taste you, taste you
And free that tongue that once was chaste

I want so much to smell you
To smell that scent of inner sense
I want so much to smell you, smell you
And smell the cream that’s pleasure sent

I want so much to hear you
To hear you roar from every pore
I want so much to hear you, hear you
Until you learn what that body’s for

I’ll touch your all five senses
Until it drives you senseless… senseless…

I’ll touch your all five senses
It’ll be relentless… relentless

NATHAN

I want so much to touch you
I want so much to make you smile
I want so much to feel you, feel you
I want so much to make you mine

I want so much to explore you
Search every crevice, tour every pore
I want so much to explore you, tour you
Explore that valley until you roar

SARA

uhhhhhhhhhh

NATHAN

I want so much to hear you
To stir you up until you purr
I want so much to hear you, hear you
Until both our minds are just a blur

I want so much to taste you
From that source that brings your waste
I want so much to taste you... taste you
With this tongue that once was chaste

SARA

You’ve touched my all five senses
And it drives me senseless... senseless!

You’ve touched my all five senses
And it’s just relentless... relentless!

NATHAN

You’ve gone past all defenses
And now I’m just defenseless... defenseless!
It’s just a horny feeling
And well it’s just relentless... relentless!

SARA & NATHAN

I want so much to touch you
I want so much to make you smile
I want so much to feel you, feel you
I want so much to make you mine

I want so much to hear you
I want so much to hear your roar
(Hear your purr)
I want so much to hear you, hear you
As I come
(warm down your fur)

NATHAN

I want so much to feel you
To seal the deal and steal your heart
I want so much to feel you... feel you...
I want to peel your v apart...

It’s the want that haunts me
That’s haunts my nerves
And feels your curves...

It’s the want that haunts me
That rips me inside
And begs for more...

It’s the want that haunts me
That haunts my mind
And my insides

Yes this want will haunt you
Despite all you have
It’s you me you want...

[Suggestion they are going to have sex}

[Scene changes] [Back at the Zoo]

JACOB

Hey Good morning, Nathan!

NATHAN

Oh hi, Jake.

JACOB

I see you brought a visitor, today.

NATHAN

Oh yes, this is Sara.

JACOB

Pleased.

ENSEMBLE #1

Oh is this the girl you’re in love with?

NATHAN

Well…

ENSEMBLE #1

You’re Sara, right?

SARA

Yes.

ENSEMBLE #1

Did you know Nate’s the son of Senator Wolfe?

SARA

Of course.

ENSEMBLE #1

Hey Jake… What do you think… do you think our little Nate’s in love?

JACOB

I think love’s an inner energy that only that person can truly know.

SARA

Really? Have you ever been in love?

JACOB

Every day.

SARA

Ha. That’s a joke.

JACOB

Let me explain.

JACOB

Love is the only thing…

SARA

Right [sarcastic]

JACOB

Love is the only thing…

NATHAN

Really?

JACOB

Love is the only thing…

ENSEMBLE

Tell it how it is…

JACOB

Love is the only thing
That turns me on…

Song #7 Love is the Only Thing… That turns me On

Love is the only thing
That turns me on
I know it sounds kind of strange
But it’s the road I’m on
Some may say my way
Is once upon upon
But love is the only thing
That really turns me on

Sure, a well place slit
Can make my heartbeat tick
And a guy like me enjoys
A little tongue and spit
But beauty better come with some smarts and wit
Or else my manly bone will moan
Nope, Not it.

And, indeed, a man like me enjoys a graceful body
David and ballet are two of my favorite hobbies
But my soul needs more than just these skin deep hotties
It craves that strong emotion that can shake a body

For, yes, sweet attraction causes me reaction
The sort of reaction that puts a heart in action
But I’m telling you here that it’s not attraction
That has overcome my soul with the greatest traction

For those butts, boobs and woodies
May have some allure
But they’re not the human features
That can rock my core
They cannot understand
With both a woman and man
But my reality is real
So probably God--- He can.

ENSEMBLE

Amen!

JACOB

Love is the only thing
That turns me on
I know it sounds kind of strange
But it s the road I’m on
Soe may say my way is once upon upon
But to me it is the road
That God has put me on

You know, you know most men
Have these one through tens
Saying she’s a Four
And over there a Seven
And so they go about like Pavlov’s dogs
While Hollywood equips them with their manly logs.

And yet most look me down
When I see all around
Beauty, beauty, beauty, how it dances, abounds?
Wrap yourself in chains
And they’ll give you a crown
Because they are afraid
Of beauty’s muted sound.

But you know this is no time
For me to pout and frown
I am one lucky man
In either suit or gown

ENSEMBLE

Oh… that’s right.

JACOB

And this my friend
I tell you
Is the true low-down
That love is the only thing
That really turns me on

Love (music) (dance)
Love (music) (dance)
Love (music) (dance)

Love is the only thing
That really turns me on

Sure, a pretty face
Can make my heart beat race
And sure a little touch
Can make my pants dance (uh)
And cleavage is a privilege
That is such a rush
But in the end it all doesn’t matter much…

SARA

Bullshit.

JACOB

For when I see a man who is handsome and tan
I may feel a little tweak in my libido plan
And when I see a woman who is hot and movin’
My face may burn hot while these pants start cooin’
But these feelins don’t contain my identity
I’m probably not the one for either he or she
If they don’t produce that inner, inner energy
I’m better off jackin’ off to MTV

Michaelangelo had his David
And Homer Achilles
Proust and Oscar Wilde
Were genius embodied
And Shakespeare, if you read him
You would think he were queer
And yet the modern world
Wants to destroy what is dear

For we all have this
Curiosity
And some try to hide it
With insecurities
But everybody has
That necessity
That strong emotion
That can shake a body

And though I might be different
May not have your range
Still, that sweet emotion
Rocks me the same
My scope is in the hope
Of every woman and man
It seeks that strong emotion
That no body can stand

Love is the only thing that turns me on
Love is the only thing that turns me on
Love is the only thing that turns me on

ENSEMBLE

Love, Love, Love, Love, Love, Love, Love

JACOB

It turns me on

Love is the only thing
That turns me on
I know it sounds kind of strange
But it’s the road I’m on
Some may say my way
Is once upon upon
But love is the one emotion
It’s the road I’m on

I really don’t care about when I get old
Some love for this reason, or so I am told
I love because it puts my whole body in motion
It chills my brain and skin-- causes sweet emotion
So never be afraid to love a man
Never be afraid to love a strong woman
Never be afraid to love who you love
For life is pain and hardship--- answered in this love

And though a sexy strip
May make me go drip, drip
And though some lingerie
Suggests a beautiful trip
Let me leave you
With this one hard earned tip
If you want to live in life
Just be lookin’ for it

Because a pretty face
Can make a heartbeat race
But it’s only that emotion
That can make me chase
I cannot quite explain how it comes about
All I know is this
It’s what it’s all about

And though some might answer

SARA

C’mon, C’mon

JACOB

Unwilling to listen
To this road I’m on
I tell them there’s no choice
That this is my voice
God gave us all a choice
To speak in love’s one voice

Love is the only thing
It’s what we’re all about
Love is the only thing
It’s what we need to feel
Love Is the only thing
So if you feel it, come out
Because to deny it
Is to be without

ENSEMBLE #1

Oh that was delightful Jake! Utterly absurd! But delightful.

JACOB

Yeah, I know. Some truths just aren’t that easy. If you would all excuse me, I have some cages to clean.

[JACOB exits]

NATHAN

Sara, I feel exactly as he feels!

SARA

Don’t be stupid.

NATHAN

No really… I think my attraction to you is so much greater… because well… because I love you.

SARA

You’re just naïve.

NATHAN

No… you’re wrong.

SARA

Trust me Nathan, you’re not in love. Life is cruel and hard, and the only thing that’s kept you this way is too many Disney movies and a rich and privileged lifestyle. You’re just… you’re just…

NATHAN

Sara, You don’t understand… I know there are troubles. I know that at this moment little kids in Haiti are eating cookies of mud because they can’ afford anything else… I’m aware of the struggles of homeless people because I serve them food at the soup kitchen, I’m aware of how the earth suffers because of human greed, why else do you think I work here at the zoo… but how I feel for you right now, it’s so much greater than that… it’s beautiful.

SARA

Nathan, you know, but you haven’t experienced. Trust me. You just don’t know. Anything. Not anything.

Song #8 You Can Count on Me

NATHAN

Sara, I’m aware there are troubles
I’m aware there is pain
But I’m here if there doubled
‘Cause my love will remain
No matter the amount
Or ever how it came
There’s never cause for doubt
‘Cause you can count on me

You know my story
Ok, you know it well
I’m a spoiled boy
Gifts by a father’s pen
And you could go on and on
Tellin’ me how you were then
But why bother with that
When you can count on me

Perhaps you’ve been wrongfully tried
Or thought of suicide
Or, perhaps, you’ve been abused
Heck, I know that I’ve been used
But I don’t really care
About any pain you may share
‘Cause when I’m next to you
My world’s a brighter hue

So now trust in me
I will make things right
For I’m in love with you
And I intend to hold you tight
For this love I have
It’s so easy to see
That it’s only you that counts
And you can count on me

Oh you can count on me
Yes, you can count on me
Through these urban jungles
Or the seven seas
You can count on me
Oh, you can count on me
It’s only you that counts
And you can count on me.

Oh I ain’t no angel
I have done some wrongs

SARA

I kind of doubt it

NATHAN

But I’m not a stranger
Can’t you see by this song?
‘Cause my love for you
Makes me as strong as I get
And so may you never forget
How you can count on me.

So while the clocks are ticking
And some thieves are hissing
And the moon light’s shining
While all hope is flicking
It’s just up to us
To keep on kissing
Because when that count is full
You can count on me

So, yeah, you may have problems
You may have your flaws
But you know, I have issues
I don’t obey all laws
And let me tell you straight
What you can see in me
Is a man in love
And you can count on me.

You can count on me
You can count on me
Oh baby, can’t you see
That you can count on me
Oh you can count on me
Yes, you can count on me
It’s only you that counts
And you can count on me.

I know you question
Will it last forever?
And I’ve heard that love
Is a brutal endeavor
But my love for you
Is beyond ingénue
It’s these lives we share
That bind it true

And maybe I’m just a dreamer

SARA

Indeed

NATHAN

Of a special team or
I’m just a crazy man
Who’s a victim of schemes
But whatever this is
If it’s just a fairy tale
When I look at you
My world’s a brigher hue

So let me end
By saying what’s on my mind
This love for you
Is always on my mind
As the road is long
And the road is tough
But with you I’m strong
And you can count on me

Oh you can count on me
You can count on me
Oh Sara can’t you see
That you can count on me?
Through this urban jungle
Or the seven seas
It’s only you that counts
And you can count on me

Yes. You can count on me.

SARA

Nathan, that was really… that was really… lovely… anyway, I have to go. We’ll talk later, okay?

NATHAN

Okay.

SARA

Bye.

NATHAN

Bye.

ENSEMBLE #5

Hey Nate, what did you say her name was?

NATHAN

That’s Sara.

ENSEMBLE #5

Really? I could almost swear that was Natasha.

NATHAN

Who?

ENSEMBLE #5

I was contracted to some housework for her husband a couple of months ago.

NATHAN

Must be someone else.

ENSEMBLE #5

Oh… I don’t know. She has a face that’s pretty impossible to forget. Just try to be careful, Nate.

[ENSEMBLE #5 leaves]

NATHAN

No… that’s impossible.

Sara, a Natasha. Impossible.

Song #9 MISS MANIPULATIVE

ENSEMBLE

[Off Stage or Edge of Stage, Simulating mind]

What are y’ gonna give to Miss Manipulative?

NATHAN

What?

ENSEMBLE

How are y’ gonna live without Miss Manipulative? (music)

NATHAN

It’s not possible.

ENSEMBLE

Are y’ gonna miss her
Like she wants you to, Mister?

NATHAN

I love her

ENSEMBLE

How y’ gonna live without Miss Manipulative?

What else y’ gonna give to Miss Manipulative?

NATHAN

Y’all go away

ENSEMBLE

How y’ gonna live without Miss Manipulative?
Did she seduce y?
Suck your dick and use y’?
Or was it somethin’ more
That she abused, huh?

With her head on your shoulder
Did it make you feel bolder?

NATHAN

Stop it!

ENSEMBLE

And when she held your hand
Did you understand?

That you, my boy
Were just her latest toy

Last night, I bet
You weren’t this coy

And when she winked at you
What else did you think, huh?

That she was all lovey dovey
Sure, when not screwin her hubby

And when she looked in your eyes
Did you see those lies?

Or were they stuck on these
Or perhaps bare thighs

But don’t worry, friend
We don’t criticize

We know what it’s like
Lost in a woman’s thighs
So cheer up, boy
All is not lost
There are so many more
To give you a rise

NATHAN

No! No! I love her! This can’t be! [NATHAN dials his phone and storms off in pursuit of SARA]

SARA

Nathan, you seemed a little upset on the phone, you look upset. What’s wrong?

NATHAN

Oh… nothing is wrong. I mean… this is going to sound crazy… but I need to ask you a stupid question. Are you married?

SARA

Why do you ask?

NATHAN

Just answer the question, please.

SARA

Yes.

NATHAN

What?

SARA

Let me explain. I, he, I don’t really love him.

NATHAN

Is your name Natasha?

NATASHA

Yes.

NATHAN

What the fuck?

NATASHA

Please let me explain.

NATHAN

No… you’re a liar. You’re a… you’re a bitch. I hate you.

NATASHA

I’m sorry, Nathan.

Song #10: I HAD a KISS FOR THE MISS

NATHAN

I had a kiss for the Miss
But there’s no kisses for the Mrs.
Because though I know he’s not it
That doesn’t make me it
Just because the Mrs. Needs kisses

NATASHA

Let me explain.

NATHAN

I’m in no rush for the crush
That has to be hush, hush
Because though I know he’s not it
That doesn’t make me it
Just because the Mrs. Needs kisses

Because though you told me of your love
You hid “it” with your tongue [NATHAN “it” means ring]
And though with him you may not get it
With me you can forget it.

NATASHA

Please stop.

NATHAN

I had a kiss for the Miss
But there’s no kisses for the Mrs.
Because though I know he’s not it
That doesn’t make me it
Just because the Mrs. Needs kisses

I’m in no rush for the crush
That has to be hush, hush
Because though I know he’s not it
That doesn’t make me it
Just because the Mrs. Needs kisses

NATASHA

Please…

NATHAN

For when a Mrs. Needs her kisses
There’s only one reply
And that’s “oh no”
Oh no, Oh no, Hell no”
Because if you give that Mrs. Her kisses
Say goodbye to the world you know.

Oh I had a kiss for the Miss
But there’s no kisses for the Mrs.
For how could I expect
Just a little respect
From a woman who said she loved me

NATASHA

I didn’t say that.

NATHAN

Will I miss you Miss?
Who happens to be a Mrs.
Does a man miss a kiss
That tastes like piss
Does a man love a Mrs. sans kisses?

NATASHA

You cannot understand the Agony!

You cannot understand the Agony!

You cannot understand the Agony!

NATHAN NATASHA

I had a kiss for the miss
But there’s no kisses for the Mrs. [you
Because though I know he’s not it [cannot
That doesn’t make me it [understand
Just because the Mrs. Needs kisses [the agony]

I’m in no rush for the crush [You cannot
That has to be hush, hush [understand the agony]
Because though I know he’s not it [You cannot
That doesn’t make me it [understand
Just because the Mrs. Needs kisses [the agony]

NATHAN

I hate you, my former “love”
I hate you and your tongue
And I hope you never get it
For with me
Bitch
You can forget it.

[Stormy music--- a last ditch appeal--- and angry emotions on stage--- music ends--- he storms off--- she’s left crying on stage ENSEMBLE’s #2 and #4 approach her]

ENSEMBLE #2

What’s wrong, sweetie?

ENSEMBLE #4

It must me a man. Look at her. Pouring out those love tears.

ENSEMBLE #2

Don’t waste your tears on a man. He’s never worth it.

ENSEMBLE #4

Was it love?

NATASHA

Love?

ENSEMBLE #4

Yeah, Love.

NATASHA

Yeah, love… that’s what he said. Love…

ENSEMBLE #2

Well, good riddance then.

ENSEMBLE #4

It’s all a pack of lies.

NATASHA

Love

ENSEMBLE

Love

ENSEMBLE

Love

SONG #11 Love Is A Criminal Charge

NATASHA

Love!
Is a criminal charge
Every man is at large
So take care of that heart!

Love!
It will rip you apart
So when every man is at large
Take good care of that heart!

Want to be a victim?
Then just go with him…

He will fill you with lies
Until you’re filled to the brim…

And as you’re lying there…
Only thinking of him

He’s thinking of Bonnie or Ruth
Or maybe even Tim…

So watch out, boys
‘Cause I’ve had enough

Enough! Enough! Enough!
Of this love “snuff”

Enough of love
That which raises a prick

Because trust me, loves
Love is a cock of shit

Love!
Is a criminal charge
Every man is at large
So take care of that heart

Love!
It will rip you apart
So when every man is at large
Take good care of that heart!

ENSEMBLE #2

I was once in love
I was a beautiful dove

Innocent,
White as a winter glove

Just him and me
For all eternity

Oh how did I feel?
Just like a movie reel

But then he “came” one day
All smiles and glow

Sweetly comforting me
The sweet “nothings”, you know

That night I found a text
From a friend named Suzanne

Next you know, I’m his ex
Love’s not meant for a man

NATASHA and ENSEMBLE

Love!
Is a criminal charge
Every man is at large
So take care of that heart

Love!
It will rip you apart
So when every man is at large
Take good care of that heart.

ENSEMBLE #4

I was young and foolish
At the end of high school

Looking for a Romeo
With the body of Zeus

I met a boy
He said “I love you, my joy”

Oh Roy? Oh Roy? Oh Roy?
What became of you, Roy?

For as the months passed
As did the years…

The times changed
And it wasn’t careers…

For oh Roy, oh Roy,
My first lover boy

After five years, six months, and two days,
He was no longer a boy

NATASHA and ENSEMBLE

Love!
Is a criminal charge
Every man is at large
So take care of that heart!

Love!
It will rip you apart
So when every man is at large
Take good care of that heart!

NATASHA

I tell you, sisters,
I had it worse

I am beautiful
And so I am cursed

I went out to dance
Lookin’ pretty and fine

Hopin’ a special someone
Might show me a time

And so one came
And so one “came”

The first boy to approach me
I was young and insane

He said he loved me
He loved the way that I looked

And now we’re married
So I’m still on his hook…

For ladies, ladies,
Please listen to me

Listen! Listen!
If you want to be free!

He might smell of money
He might treat you with wine

He might buy you flowers
And say you are “mine”

He might use “love”
He might abuse you with “love”

But in the name of love
Love is a fuckin’ hell!

NATASHA and ENSEMBLE

Love!
Is a criminal charge
Every man is at large
So take care of that heart

Love!
It will rip you apart
So when every man is at large
Take good care of that heart

[A full set of music without lyrics featuring lots of extremely sexy, but angry, dancing]
(music) (music) (music)

NATASHA

I’ve seen them all
Handsome and tall
(music)

I’ve seen them all
Both the big and the small
(music)

Wrap you in their arms
Hold you tight
(music)

The screen fades to black
‘Cause love happens at night!
(music)

For that’s right
It’s time for love’s call
(music)

Up as the cock
Hard as the cannonball
(music)

Cuckoo cuckoo
Love pours into you
(music)

Until his genetic code
Points to, well, get a clue…
(music)

For the truth about love
Listen close, my dears
(music)

Is love’s time is up
When he doesn’t get “it” up.
(music)

I know it’s sad,
But sadly, it’s true

As the cock sings “Bonjour”
So too the “Love Adieu”

ENSEMBLE #2
Love….

ENSEMBLE #4
Love….

NATASHA
Love…

NATASHA & ENSEMBLE

Love…

[All together]
Love!!!!!!

Love!
Is a criminal charge
Every man is at large
So take care of that heart

Love!
It will rip you apart
So when every man is at large
Take good care of that heart

NATASHA

So don’t be a sucker
Don’t give into his shit
(music)

ENSEMBLE #2

Don’t be a sucker
Love is a cock of shit
(music)

ENSEMBLE #4

It’s his fantasy way
Of whetting your clit

NATASHA

And if you think it’s more
You’re as naïve as shit.
(music)

So tell me, honey
Wet with those words of honey

Do you find it funny
When he’s gone, you dummy

For his prick, my dear,
Has lost interest in you

I know it’s mean
But that’s the love adieu….

Love!
Love!
Love!
[extremely fast paced]
Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love!
Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love!
Bulllshit!

[All together]
Wanna be a victim?
Then just go with him!!!!

Wanna get ripped up?
Then just go with him!!!

Wanna lose your mind…
Then just go with him!!!!

Because as you’re lying there
Only thinking of him

He’ll be lying, lying, lying,
Lying, Lying, Lying….

Because, to a man…
Love is the penis’s whim.

[a few sexy/angry dance moves--- Music Finishes]
[Scene changes… Back at Zoo, Nathan runs into Jacob]

JACOB

Hey what are you doing here so late?

NATHAN

I had to get away. Sara… I mean Natasha… whoever she is… she’s… she’s… married.

JACOB

Oh that’s it.

NATHAN

What do you mean that’s it! ... I love her! I mean… I loved her! This… this is… terrible.

JACOB

You’re funny… trust me, you’ll get over her.

NATHAN

No I won’t. I’ll never get over her. I feel like all life has been sucked out of me.

JACOB

Hmmmmm….

NATHAN

What do you think is so funny?

JACOB

Nathan, c’mon, have you ever thought you were maybe a bit different?

NATHAN

What do you mean?

JACOB

I mean like right now, or whenever you look at me, how you can’t hold my eyes…

NATHAN

What are you talking about?

JACOB

I just… you’ll get over her. Trust me, you’ll get over her.

NATHAN

No. I want to know what you meant right there.

JACOB

Relax. The whole zoo knows, and we love you anyway. Especially me. We all love you.

NATHAN

What do you know?

No way. That’s not true. I’m in love with Sara… I mean Natasha… Fuck… Fuck…

JACOB

Nathan… my timing… well, it wasn’t ideal here

NATHAN

Fuck…

[NATHAN runs off through the zoo]

It’s not possible… What does he mean how I can’t look at him. Though I can’t look at him. But I love Sara. And I worked. You know, I worked. I worked, dammit! I can’t be that way, because I worked. I am not gay. You know I’m not gay. I can’t be gay, because I love her. Fuck, I hate her fucking guts … And yet… oh fuck… what’s going on?

[Nathan collapses]

Song #12 This Girl Is A Tiger

TIGER

[ENSEMBLE #4 in Tiger Costume]

There’s a stirring through the jungle
In the setting urban zoo
And though try deny it
There’s that animal in you

So don’t try to fight it
Because it’s coming now for you
I’m a girl with ziggy stripes
And these claws are meant for you

This girl
Is a tiger
I am a pretty Asian girl
With a
Fire
And if you look up
Desire
You’ll see this pretty Asian girl
With a
Fire!

NATHAN

What?

TIGER

(music)

Grrr!

(music)

Meow

(music)

You know you want me

(music)

And you know just how

(music)

So come and get me

(music)

My might my night

(music)

Just come and touch me

(music)

You’ll feel alright.

(music)

Your life was never the same
Once you stuck your tricky dick into my space
You had that warm smile for a pretty face
And my pretty witty purr sent you through my space

For what’s as good as doing what you should
And this pretty tempting cat does give you wood
So just think of me and you’ll want to be
A grinning Cheshire cat whose inside of me

(music)

Grrr

(music)

Meow

(music)

wakka wakka

(music)

coochy oww

(music)

Come and get me

You know you want me

Oh come and get me

With my meow

I will

I’ll show you how

As this girl
Is a Tiger
I am a pretty Asian girl
With a fire!

And if you look up
Desire
You’ll see a pretty Asian girl
With a fire!

Song #13 Hippopotamus

Two Hippos

[ENSEMBLE #1 and 3 in hippo costume]

Oh watch out cat
This boy is sick of thou
He doesn’t need your porn
Or those sick meows

What he really needs
Is his inner stuff
That calls inside
And calls for manly stuff

Get hip
Get hip hippo down
Get hip
Shake that booty round
Get hip
Let the beat take you down
For there’s no one as hip
Or likes to take a dip
As much as we
In hip hippo town

Get hip
Be purple proud
Get hip
Don’t be asking how
Get hip
Just be going to town
For there’s no one as hip
Or likes to take a dip
As much as we
In hip hippo town

You should want to be
A hip hippopotamus
For how will you learn to dance
This is a must!
For we hippos dance off that booty floor
We are happiest in him!
That’s no folklore.

So just move your hips
And do the hippo dip
Meaning dip that butt to the floor!
And then get it back up
And shake it again
And then dip it down low some more!

For if you want to be hip
In hip hippo town
Then you have to learn how to dance
This is a must!
For the only rhyme
In hip hippo time
Is the splash of that booty’s sound
So bring it down!

Get hip
Get hip hippo down!
Get hip
Swing those hips around!
Get hip
Bring those buns low down!
For there’s no one as hip
Or likes to take a dip
As much as we
In hip hippo town!

Get hip
Make the music proud!
Get hip
Shake that ass around!
Get hip
Shake it while you go down!
For there’s no one as hip
Or likes to take a dip
As much as we
In hip hippo town!

So if you want to dance
Give yourself half a chance
And dance as a hippo knows
For we hip hippo goes
Like a song no one knows
We are booties without control

So as you dance
Upon the great dance floor
Don’t be a stick in mud
No... let it go!
For the dance that’s in
Is the dance within!
Just shake that booty without control!

And get hip
Get hip hippo down
Get hip
Shake it all around!
Get hip
Make we hippos proud!
For there’s no one as hip
Or likes to take a dip
As much as we
In hip hippo town!

Song #14 Cuttlefish

[ENSEMBLE #5 in Cuttlefish costume]

Oh Nathan
Poor Nathan
You’re not a tiger
Nor a hippo
You know what you are…

When you're dancing on the ocean floor
And you're wondering what your life is for
There's one fish to grant your every wish
Come up and cuddle with the cuttlefish

Come up and cuddle with the cuttlefish
I'm the fish to grant your every wish
I'm the genie of the ocean floor
Because to me you seem a tasty dish!

It doesn't matter if you're a girl or boy
Purple proud or a busty coy
I've got a place for both the lad and dame
It's the palace of my pants domain

So if you’re the type of fish like to eat
I'm the type of fish you'd want to meet
Because a cuttlefish is awfully sweet
And after dinner--- always my treat

Come up and cuddle with the cuttlefish
I'm the fish to grant your every wish
I'm the genie of the ocean floor
Because to me all seem a tasty dish

When I'm swimming near the sea floor ground
I like to think of a tiger growl
And when I'm swimming through a plant life scene
I like to think of hippos--- you know what I mean

Because I bet that you all never knew
That my tastes can turn to every hue
The beauty that I may see is no mirage
Chromosomes are not a camouflage

For didn't I tell you I'm the sea's genie
And that's because you all may never see
That what I define as great beauty
Lives in the form of both a he and she

Come up and cuddle with the cuttlefish
I'm the fish to grant your every wish
I'm the genie of the ocean floor
Because to me all seem a tasty dish

Come up and cuddle with the cuttlefish!

TIGER

This Girl is a Tiger!

CUTTLEFISH

Come up and cuddle with the cuttlefish

HIPPOPOTAMUS

Get Hip Get Hippo Down

TIGER

I’m a pretty Asian Girl with a Fire!

CUTTLEFISH

Come up and cuddle with the cuttlefish

HIPPOPOTAMUS

Get Hip Get Hippo Down

{Musically arrange it so all of them are singing together--- and they approach him as a combined nightmare singing team —as JACOB enters stage they depart]

JACOB

Hey, Wake up… Wake up… you’re having a nightmare.

NATHAN

Jake… Jake…

JACOB

Yes?

NATHAN

Jake, what the hell is wrong with me?

JACOB

There’s nothing wrong with you…

NATHAN

But I’m fucked up. I don’t know who the hell I am. I don’t have any clue.

JACOB

Relax. Relax. I know who you are. You’re one of the kindest, most passionate, good people I know. Everyone knows that.

NATHAN

But I can’t… I just can’t… be like you…

JACOB

Nathan…

Song #15 You’re okay

If I could tell you how I feel
If I could open up your brain
If I could borrow a little sorrow
And kiss away this pain...
If I could tell you of your smile
And how it makes me feel
I would wipe this all away
And would tell you you're ok

If I could walk the path you follow
If I could comprehend these stars
If I could shine your light upon you
And let it dissipate the rain...
If I could tell you of your light
And the brightness of your glow
I would stay with you all night
Because Nate, you're ok.

You're ok. You're ok. Nate, you're ok.
For all your pain and sorrow
I'm with you here today
You're ok. You're ok. Nate, you're ok.
'Cause every time I'm with you
You always make my day.

You know I'm just a silly poet
I have no room for lies
And every time I'm with you
I see beauty in your eyes
Oh I know you have this sorrow
Mine is written, in each note
But for every tear we borrow
It helps our spirits float

For the beauty of your smile
For the beauty of your eyes
For the beauty of those tears
For that way you stare aside
For all within your head
For all the beauty in your eyes
You have to say I love you
This should come as no surprise.

You're ok. You're ok. Nate, you're ok.
You know I’ve always loved you
Could always see it in my eyes
You're ok. You're ok. Nate, you're ok.
This is why I truly love you
For this rhythm in your eyes.

NATHAN

[pause]

My dad’s going kill me.

JACOB

Oh he’ll see… there’s nothing that can’t be fixed.

NATHAN

[Thinking]

But I want to keep my penis.

[They both laugh… They embrace… End Act 1]

"The Animals" Cast & Act 1 Plot Summary/ Song Listing

2010-05-04T20:51:00.000-07:00

The Animals

By Peyton Charles Ware

Bare Bones Cast (9):

Nathaniel Wolfe: Protagonist, Son of Senator, Shy, Sexually Confused
Sara/ Natasha Fox: Sexy, Attracted to Nathaniel, Married,
Jacob Wilde: Bi-sexual, Self-aware, Co-worker of Nathan's at Zoo
Edward Wolfe: United States Senator, Father to Nathan Wolfe

Male Ensemble 1: Hippo 1, Assist on “Pope”, Backup on Group numbers
Male Ensemble 3: Cuttlefish, Backup on Group Numbers,
Male Ensemble 5: Hippo 2, Conservative boy,
Female Ensemble 2: Assist on “Criminal Charge”, Backup on Group Numbers,
Female Ensemble 4: Assist on Criminal Charge, Backup on Group Numbers,

ACT 1 Synopsis:

The plot opens with Senator Edward Wolfe giving a speech during the Zoo’s Annual Dance Party. He is celebrating his son Nathaniel’s position at the Zoo and the Pope’s upcoming visit. At the conclusion of his speech, the Zoo’s dance party begins--- “It’s Just the Manual to be the Animal”. Nathaniel seems out of place during the party. He is invited by Jacob Wilde, a coworker, to dance but Nathan declines. Sara makes her entrance... singing “Youth I have It”, and seducing just about every guy on the stage (and audience). Nathaniel, alone and pathetic, engages in a moment of self-pity: “Sometimes I’m Alone Like the Lone Wolf”. Sara takes an interest in Nathan and slips him her number. He is overjoyed, but Jacob isn’t as happy. Jacob sings “JayWalker”.

Nathaniel and Sara are together on an intimate date… She teases his ridiculous, conservative demeanor… in response he sings “I Don’t Wanna Be Rude, But I think you’re Cute”… She thinks this is rather cute, but raises the stakes with “I Want So much to Touch You” which becomes a steamy duet… Passionate Love Making ensues…

Following the passionate evening, Nathaniel and Sara walk into Jacob Wilde. He sings “Love is the Only Thing that Turns Me On”… As Jacob leaves, Nathaniel professes his love for Sara “You Can Count On Me”. Once she leaves, Nathan is informed that Sara is married and named Natasha: “Miss Manipulative”. Enraged, Nathaniel confronts Sara “I had a kiss for the Miss” and leaves her abruptly. The stage darkens and Sara sings about how love is a cock of shit in the stormy dance number “Love is a Criminal Charge”.

Devastated, Nathaniel tries to find comfort at the Zoo where he finds Jacob. Instead of comfort, he comes to the realization he’s gay. Nathan freaks out… He collapses in the zoo… and in a bizarre dream state reminiscent of a twisted Alice in Wonderland, dancing zoo animals start to hit on him… a sexy Tigress “This girl is a tiger”, two gay hippos “Get Hippo Down”, and a bi-sexual Cuttlefish “Cuddle with the Cuttlefish”… (yes… this is meant to be rather comedic). At the point of breakdown, Jacob finally finds Nathaniel and comforts him, revealing his love for the poor bloke. “You’re Okay”

End of Act 1

Act 1 Song Listing:

1) The Manual to be the Animal--- Full Ensemble
2) Youth I Have It, I’m Gonna Use It--- Sara
3) Sometimes I’m Alone Like the Lone Wolf--- Nathan
4) JayWalker--- Jacob
5) I Don’t Wanna Be rude--- Nathan
6) I Want So Much To Touch You--- Sara and Nathan
7) Love is the Only Thing That Turns Me On--- Jacob
8) You Can Count On Me--- Nathan
9) Miss Manipulative--- Ensemble
10) I Had a Kiss For the Miss--- Nathan and Sara
11) Love Is a Criminal Charge--- Sara/Natasha and Female Ensemble
12) This Girl is a Tiger--- Female Ensemble 2
13) Hip Hippo Down—Male Ensemble 1 and 3
14) Cuddle with the Cuttlefish—Male Ensemble 5
15) You’re okay--- Jacob

Happy Birthday Lil' Uno!!!

2010-05-04T20:36:00.000-07:00

Everyone that knows me knows how much I love my sisters. At least ten times a day, and almost always when I’m feeling down, I will say to myself “I love my sisters”, and will think of them, and this always cheers me right up. It is a most valuable comfort to know that someone will always love you, no matter what, and I am truly grateful for my two wonderful sisters.

What some of you might not know is that my baby sister, the lil’ uno, always calls me “Pedro”. She calls me this because when I was in high school, my favorite baseball player was Pedro Martinez of the Boston Red Sox. I watched almost every single Red Sox game that he played in, made sure that he was on all of my fantasy baseball teams, and cheered for him fanatically. Of course, my sister, clearly sensing that I wanted to be Pedro Martinez, just started calling me “Pedro”… the rest is history.

So when I show these photos of a T-Rex, I can assure you that it was not stolen from Pedro Martinez’s basement, or from the movie Napoleon Dynamite, or from my next door neighbor Chuck, who also happens to go by the name Pedro--- no, this is a piece of art, painted by my wonderful sister--- who I love to the infinite power (and beyond)… and who is one of the greatest human beings alive… and has a universe of warmth and love swirling out of her heart and into me and probably just about everyone she knows… and made this piece of art just for me… I love you too, Lil’ Uno!!!!

Happy Birthday and Cinco de Mayo!!!!

One of the reasons I wanted to post Act 1 today was because my sister is extremely supportive… a few weeks ago she asked me--- What’s up with your musical??? And that reminded me to get back to work… I love her very very very very very very much. Anyone who has a person in their life like my baby sister should know how lucky they are… Life is so much more precious with a person who says they love you, but extends the v... "I Lovvvvvvvvvvv U" I love you, Lil' Uno! -#1 Bro

Life As It Is

2010-04-30T17:31:00.001-07:00

Hey all,

Sorry for the lack of posts in a while. I would like it if I did better sometimes.

I do hope to get a draft of Act 1 to you by next week (hopefully on my sister's birthday)--- because she always believes in me and I love her.

I've been really busy in terms of work (big thing going on where I work), anxiety(partially regarding writing the musical), and other stuff, but I'm constantly inspired by the preacher of the church I go to (I go to Foundry Methodist in DC)... it's a church that equates God with love and justice, which is beautiful. Many thanks to my friends and people I love. This clip is from "Man of La Mancha"; Miguel de Cervantes speaks about the sort of madness that I think we all should aspire to. This is one of the most influential speeches in my life (and it's from a musical, of course).

-P

Elope With Hope

2010-02-14T09:29:00.001-08:00

Ok... so here's the epic finale to the musical... the first part is classic musical--- story-telling lyrics with a standard chorus... the second part is a more modern-like dance number "elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope" with a small rap built in, and the finale is a thrilling anthem with a constant musical buildup as they sing "Elope With Hope". Thank you, God. Anyway, I can't expect you to hear it, but I think it's really, truly, good...

Elope with Hope

The news is playing with the radio on
In New York a murder, maybe war in Iran
My ex boyfriend is gay, and my husband is gone
And I have no friends, except for you and your man
But this ain’t no time for me to sing my swan
For I’ve eloped with hope
And we are gonna go far

Oh I’ve eloped with hope
And we are gonna go far

The record’s playing with an old time saying
Just be living life or be decaying
Don’t be waiting, when you could be changing
Just be yourself, ain’t that the saying
And this new found freedom has got me swaying
To the musical beat
Of celebrating
And on this day we will all be praying
To the newest prayer
Thank you God for staying

For I’ve eloped with hope
And we are gonna go far

Oh I’ve eloped with hope
And we are gonna go far

Thank you Sara
For being my friend
I know it’s not easy
With the things I did
But I want you to know
You can still count on me
Because I know who I am now
And your love has helped me

For this life is tough
It sure ain’t easy
Just finding myself
Made me want to kill me
But one thing’s for sure
And this I want to tell thee
Every time you smile
It always thrills me

And the radio’s on
But there’s hope in it
For friends like you
Keep my spirit lit
And Jake and I
We have battled through it
And I love my dad
Although an elephant
And yes it’s clear
I’m also married to it

For I’ve eloped with hope
And we are gonna go far

Oh I’ve eloped with hope
And we are gonna go far

Hello, I’m Jake
I’m your favorite jaywalker
Am I a smooth criminal
Or just your favorite talker
I love you all
It’s my only true state
For this love thing
Well, it’s my favorite trait

I’ve been beaten
Perhaps you thought I was dead
But how could I be dead
When I have such a strong head
But love, you know,
Is the only true road
The only one I chose
So long ago
And to this day, it is still true…

That I’ve eloped with hope
And we are gonna go far
Ooo ooo

That I’ve eloped with hope
And we are gonna go far

Sure, I’m the dad
Your least favorite, the villain
But you know I’m not
Just lost in tradition
For my son, I know
Is more important to me
Than all the votes in the world
He means the world to me

And my love for him
Has shown me the way
That love is meant for all
Both straight and gay
And I just wanted to say
I love you today

(I love you too, dad)

For we’ve eloped with hope
And we are gonna go far

Ohhhh we’ve eloped with hope and we are gonna go far

Oooooo yeah

We’ve eloped with hooooooope
And we are gonna go far

(quicken up the music--- bring out the full cast)

We say nope to the pope
There’s a new way to cope
And we elope with hope
We elope with hope

We say nope to the scope
That’s too narrow for hope
And we elope with hope
We elope with hope

For God’s scope
Is a kaleidoscope
Every sister
Every brother

For God’s scope
Is a kaleidoscope
Tan, White, Black
Or Purple Taupe

For God’s scope
Is a kaleidoscope
Love each other
Or be a dope

For God’s scope
Is a ray of hope
Just be accepting
And not a dope

We Elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope
We elope with hope
We elope with hope

We Elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope
We elope with hope
We elope with hope

We Elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope
We elope with hope
We elope with hope

We Elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope
We elope with hope
Oh we elope with hope

Every sister
Every brother

Elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope

Every brother
From every color

Elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope

We Love God
And Love is God

Elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope

For the new religion
Is the old religion
Just love us all
For we’re all God’s children
Whether straight or gay
Or young or old
Or maybe even both
If you are so bold
There’s this golden rule
Or so I’ve been told
Just love thy neighbor
With all your soul
And if you can’t handle it
Then take your shit
And leave us alone
You fucking hypocrites

We elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope
We elope with hope
We elope with hope

We elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope
We elope with hope
We elope with hope

We elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope
We elope with hope
We elope with hope

We elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope
We elope with hope
We elope with hope

When love’s around
No microscopes
Just elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope

When love’s around
No Misanthropopes
Just elopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa-lopa with hope

When’s love’s around
Just go for broke
And elope
Elope
Elope
With hope

Elope
Elope
Elope
With hope

Elope
Elope
Elope
With hope

Elope
Elope
Elope
With hope

Elope
Elope
Elope
With hope

Elope
Elope
Elope
With hope

Elope
Elope
Elope
With hope

Elope
Elope
Elope
With hope

Elope
Elope
Elope
With hope

Elope
Elope
Elope
With hope

Elope
Elope
Elope
With hope

Elope
Elope
Elope
With hope

Elope
Elope
Elope
With hope

For Love is God
And God is Love

For everyone

Musical flurry

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa------ Meeeeeeeeeeeeen

(musical end)

Thank you!!!!

We love you! All of you

(Wrap up)

[Curtain close]

No day but today

2010-02-12T15:09:00.000-08:00

As we approach Valentine's day, I can honestly say that everyone I have ever said "I love you" I still love, deeply, and I thank God for the friends and family I have. I am truly fortunate. And this song is inspiring. I hope to get you maybe a plot outline of my musical by this weekend or maybe next week... I really, really, want it to be good. Please God!!! I ask this just about every night along with saying thanks for all the people I love (and who love me). I am truly grateful. Ok... here's the song... from the musical "Rent" by Jonathan Larson.

-Peyton

Action of Passion

2010-02-11T09:22:00.000-08:00

Some day maybe I'll go see a therapist...

Until then... enjoy this bit of ridiculousness...

I hope to use this song to open Act 2... it's fast paced, silly, and catchy--- and just as it reads, it sounds absolutely ridiculous

As you might imagine, it involves a crazy, sexy, and wild dance number... I think both acts should start with a bang.
------------

Action of Passion

Lights, Camera, Action…

(music)

The coming attraction
To the latest attraction
Is the action of passion
The action of passion

The only beat
To the heat
Of two bodies
Is the action of passion
The action of passion

So take your clothes
Take your clothes
Take your clothes
All off

And we will
Dance
Dance
Dance
In the natural buff

So
Take your clothes
Take your clothes
Take your clothes
All off

And we will
Dance
Dance
Dance
While you shake that butt

So
Take your clothes
Take your clothes
Take your clothes
All off
Because you my babe
Are real hot stuff

So take your clothes
Take your clothes
Take your clothes
All off

And we will
Shake
Shake
Shake it
Til’ the dragon puffs

As the physics
Of physical action
Is every touch
Has an equal and warm
Reaction

As the physics
Of physical action
Is while you
Shake it
Shake it
Shake it
You will get a reaction

As the physics
Of physical action
Is that you my, babe
Are the main attraction

As the physics
Of physical action
Is gravity don’t exist
When I see you in action

[uh uh uh uh uh uh]

The physics
Of physical passion

[uh uh uh uh uh uh]

The passion
Of a moment of action

[uh uh uh uh uh uh]

Every touch
Is a state of reaction

[uh uh uh uh uh uh]

To the action
Of physical passion

Can you imagin’?
A moment of passion’

Can you imagin’
A bed frame smashin’

Can you imagin’?
A moment of passion’

Can you you imagin’?
A monster mashin’

Can you imagin’?
A moment of passion

Can you imagin’?
A nudie pageant

Can you imagin’
A moment of passion

All I know is this
You have plenty to ration

As the beat
Of the heat
Is some magical stuff
I’d like to meet you, meet you, meet you
In some handcuffs

As the beat
Of the heat
Is some magical stuff
I‘d like to have it, have it, have it,
Have it a little rough

As the beat
Of the heat
Is some magical stuff
I’d like to see you, see you, see you
Bouncing in the buff

As the beat
Of the heat
Is some magical stuff
So just move, move, move
Oh shake that butt

For this simple
This simple attraction
Can always produce in me
That seismic action

For this simple
This simple attraction
Is a nuclear bomb
Exploding with a passion

For this simple
This simple attraction
Is related to you
And your boody’s action

For this simple
This simple attraction
Is found in you
So c’mon and kiss me with passion

[uh uh uh uh uh uh]

The physics
Of physical passion

[uh uh uh uh uh uh]

The passion
Of a moment of action

[uh uh uh uh uh uh]

Every touch
Is a state of reaction

[uh uh uh uh uh uh]

To the action
Of physical passion

Exploding bombs
Flying spears
It’s just you, babe
Your ass between my ears

Civil war
Violent plague
All this and more
Is when you’re away

Oh come to me
So come with me
And share the physics
Of this physical glee

Oh come to me
So come with me
I’m not complete
Until you’re next to me

For the passion
That can cause a reaction
Is the passion of a
Physical action

For the passion
That can cause a reaction
Is the passion of a
Dual attraction

For the passion
That can cause a reaction
Is the passion
Written in your ass (uh)

For the passion
That can cause a reaction
Is the passion
In a moment of passion

(crazy dance jammin music)
(crazy music)
(crazy dancing)

So come with me
And
Move with me
And together
We will make
Sweet History

Oh come with me and
Oh move with me
But with protection
So we don’t make it
Literally

Oh come with me
Oh move with me
And together we are one
With synergy

Oh come with me
Oh come with me
Oh come, come, come, come, come
With glee

For the coming attraction
To the latest attraction
Is the action of passion
The action of passion

The only beat
To heat of two bodies
Is the action of passion
The action of passion

So now we’re off
Now we’re off
Now we’re off off off
Like flying rockets
With our shirts torn off

Now we’re off
Now we’re off
Now we’re off off off
Just pretend I look like
David Hasselhoff

Now we’re off
Now we’re off
Now we’re off off off
And with you, that means
Less jackin’ off

Now we’re off
Now we’re off
Now we’re off off off
Hurrah hurrah
For gettin’ off

Poison Oak

2010-02-09T10:21:00.000-08:00

"Poison Oak" Lyrics and Music by Conor Oberst from Bright Eyes--- album, "I'm Wide Awake It's Morning"

I am the Pope...

2010-02-08T16:34:00.000-08:00

Sorry to offend some, but he had it comin'... Special thanks to Mel Brooks for this one...

----------------------------

I am The Pope

[My favorite character and a few buddies come to the party dressed as the pope and bishops]
----

I am the pope
I hope you listen
If you want to go to heaven
And glisten

I am the pope
I hope you listen
To the words of the soul’s
Nutrition!

I have lived so many years
With God within my ears
Telling me the ways to live
In this world

And if you want to go to heaven
Between now and Armageddon
There’s a few rules you need
To know!

Number One
(Number One)
No sex!
(No sex)
I am the pope
What else did you expect?
I am the pope
(He’s the pope)
So no sex!
(No sex!)
Unless you meet a few conditions!

If you’re married
It’s okay
To have sex
Anyway
At least two times a month
Is okay
She will want you to have sex
And as a husband
Such is sex
Part of your God-given mission!

But it’s definitely not okay
To have sex, anyway
If you’re not married
Or if you are gay
For you see that is a sin
And that sex will get you in
That place that we call hell.

And all is never well
If you’re going down to hell
So listen to me, you see.
For hell is hell
And hell is hell
I tell you hell is hell.

And if you want to burn
Listen to what you yearn
When you see someone you like
For I’ve seen so many guys
I’ve been lost within their eyes
But I have resisted, why oh why???

Because I don’t want to go to hell
(No, he don’t want to go to hell)
God’s told me so many years
Have him right between my ears
And he told me not to go to hell!

So you don’t want to go to hell
(No you don’t want to go to hell)
And if you have sex
What else can you expect
But a one way ticket to hell!

For hell is passion’s spell
It’s the lining of her well
So don’t be listening to your flaws
Or your body’s lurid laws
Suppression is God’s holy lesson!

If you are young
And you are urgin’
To have sex
Just stay a virgin
You may not, but God will understand.

For sex
Is so much better
If you’re married
It is better
I’ve never had it
But God told me so!

Some say they don’t fit
But once you’re married that is it
If you don’t fit
Be content
And forget it!

For love is greater than sex
Unless it is gay sex
Because gay sex
Precludes love, you get it?

For I am the pope
And I hope you get it

If you don’t
Heaven… forget it.

I am the pope
I hope you get it

If you don’t
Hell, you get it?

Now, to rule number 2
I’m telling you real true
I am the pope
So I know what to do

And rule Number 2
[drum roll]

Condoms are dumb
Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb
Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb
Condoms are dumb
Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb
Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb D-Dumb

If you have to be rappin’
Don’t be usin’ that plastic wrappin’
Just be tap, tap, tappin
The real way

Because condoms are dumb
How else will she say “Yum”
If you never ever let her
Feel you come?

So when it comes to sex
No condoms
Just abstinence
To God
Nothing else makes sense

For God wants babies
And condoms be like rabies
If you have sex
You were meant
For punishment

For condoms are dumb
(Dumb, D-dumb, d-dumb, d-dumb)
Yes, condoms are dumb
(Dumb, D-dumb, d-dumb, d-dumb)
Condoms are dumb!
(Dubya dubya dubya dumb)
Condoms are dumb!
(Dumb, D-dumb, d-dumb, d-dumb)

[A flurry of music] [Enter into a kick-line]

For we are
(We are!)
We are
(We are!)
The rich, white men
Of the Vatican

We are
(We are!)
We are
(We are!)
The rich, white men of the Vatican

Shout Amen
(Amen!)
Shout Amen
(Amen!)
For we rich, sexless men of the Vatican

Shout Amen
(Amen!)
Shout Amen
(Amen!)
For we rich, sexless men of the Vatican

One kick
(One kick)
Another kick
(Another kick)
Take a shot
For the men of the Vatican

For if you need heaven
Between now and Armageddon
Just listen to we men from the Vatican

For heaven when Armageddon
Is the reward we will be gettin’
For not gettin’
Any
At all…

For I am the pope
(He’s the pope)
I hope you listen
(He hopes you listen)
If you want to go to heaven
And glisten

I am the pope
(He is the pope)
I hope you listen
(He hopes you listen)
To the words of the
Soul’s nutrition

For you see this boy right here
So angry and so queer
Why do you think that he is so angry?
Is it because of the church
(doo-doo-doo-doo)?
Is it because of a girl?
(doo-doo-doo-doo)
Or is it because
Behind that stern
And uptight frame
This boy right here
Is maybe
A little bit
Gay…

“YOU FUCKIN FAGGOT”
“YOU FUCKIN FAGGOT”
“YOU FUCKIN FAGGOT”

[This author’s favorite character has overstepped his bounds at this part of the play--- the young man whom he has just taunted with this song--- has flipped out over suggestion that he’s gay--- and attacks the singer--- a brawl ensues--- my favorite character is left lying on the stage--- perhaps dead]

Street Savoir Faire...

2010-02-08T08:28:00.000-08:00

For those curious about how this blog was named...

"Why Should I Worry?" by Billy Joel from the film "Oliver and Company"...

The World is Just a Zoo

2010-02-07T07:09:00.000-08:00

Ok... two things about my musical: 1) It's set, in part, in a zoo... 2) The working title is "The Animals"... I think that's an appropriate title, because the musical explores some of the instincts and drives that makes us both people and animals.

This song is a duet between the two lead male characters... the lyrics may seem rather simple, because this is very "classic music" based--- when I sing it in my head there's a lot of strings--- unlike "Love is the Only Thing" which is piano... Imagine this song much like a Wagner opera--- the music builds, and like most of these songs here, it is based on just pure emotion--- I worry that if this musical ever becomes a reality if the music will be too emotionally draining for the lead cast. Oh--- and the ( ) means second person singing-- as I said, it's a duet-- sometimes they're both singing-- particularly towards the end.

-Peyton

---------------------------

The World Is Just a Zoo

The world is just a zoo
(The world is just a zoo)

Oh what are we to do?
(Oh what are we to do?)

So many different stages
(All filled with different cages)

Oh what is it to you?
(It’s everything… as you)

The world is just a zoo
(The world is just a zoo)
The world is just a zoo
(The world is just a zoo)

They want us all to change
(They thing that we‘re all strange)
Well aren’t we a bit?
(Not I, but you’re cuckoo)

The world is just a zoo
(The world is just a zoo)
The world is just a zoo
(The world is just a zoo)
The world is just a zoo
(The world is just a zoo)
(The world is just a zoo)
The world is just a zoo

The pope and all his minions
(My father and his opinions)
They offer us God’s news
(If we subscribe to hate filled views).

They think that we’re deranged
(They call us ill and strange)
And welcome us to their cage
(Just smiling to their cage)

The world is just a zoo
(Oh what else can we do)
The world is just a zoo
(The world is just our zoo)
If love is just a sin
(What a stage we thus begin)
If our love is just a sin
(What a cage that we are in)

It’s me and it is you
(It’s me and it is you)
Encaged within this zoo
(Encaged within this zoo)

It seems like bigotry
(Grows out here like a weed)
When love is all we need
(Yes, love is all we need)

The world is just a zoo
(Ooo-ooo-ooo)
The world is just a zoo
(Ooo-ooo-ooo)
The world is just a zoo
The world is just a zoo
The world is just a zoo

[music is building]

The world is just a zoo
(music)
The world is just a zoo
(music)
The world is just a zoo
The world is just a zoo
The world is just a zoo

[music is building]

Are we animals, that’s all?
(Are we animals, that’s all?)
Stuck with in our zoos
(Stuck within our zoos)
Saying what to do
Don’t be true to you
Is this as selfish as we be
What would Jesus think
Would he

[music explodes—passion reigns]

The world is just a zoo
The world is just a zoo
The world is just a zoo
The world is just a zoo
The world is just a zoo
The world is just a zoo
What would Jesus do?
Have they ever thought it through?

[music climax--- like an opera]

The world is just a zoo
(Ohhh Ohh Ohhh)
The world is just a zoo
(Ohh Ohh Ohhh)

[music quiets down]

The world is just a zoo
(The world is just a zoo)
Just me and just you
(At least our cage was made for two)

[Ends with a stage kiss]

Love is the Only Thing...

2010-02-06T12:20:00.000-08:00

In the spring of my senior year of high school, one of my teachers, Mr. Curtis, pulled me aside. He asked me, rather bluntly, "Peyton, have you ever thought of what you could achieve if you actually tried?"

Well, Mr. Curtis, now I'm trying....

---------------------------------

Love is the Only Thing
That Turns Me On

Love is the only thing
That turns me on
I know it sounds kind of strange
But it’s the road I’m on
Some may say my way
Is once upon upon
But love is the only thing
That really turns me on

Love is the only thing
That turns me on
I know it sounds kind of strange
But it’s the road I’m on
Some may say my way
Is once upon upon
But love is the only thing
That really turns me on

Sure, a well placed slit
Can make my heartbeat tick
And a guy like me enjoys
A little tongue and spit
But beauty better come with some smarts and wit
Or else my manly bone will moan
Nope, Not it.

And, indeed, a man like me enjoys a graceful body
David and ballet are two of my favorite hobbies
But my soul needs more than just these skin deep hotties
It craves that strong emotion that can shake a body

For, yes, sweet attraction causes me reaction
The sort of reaction that puts a heart in action
But I’m telling you here that it’s not attraction
That has overcome my soul with the greatest traction

For those butts, boobs and woodies
May have some allure
But they’re not the human features
That can rock my core
They cannot understand
With both a woman and man
But my reality is real
So probably God--- He can.

Love is the only thing
That turns me on
I know it sounds kind of strange
But it’s the road I’m on
Some may say my way is once upon upon
But to me it is the road
That God has put me on

You know, you know most men
Have these one through tens
Saying she’s a Four
And over there a Seven
And so they go about like Pavlov’s dogs
While Hollywood equips them with their manly logs.

And yet they look me down
When I see all around
Beauty, beauty, beauty, how it dances, abounds?
Wrap yourself in chains
And they’ll give you a crown
Because they are afraid
Of beauty’s muted sound.

But you know this is no time
For me to pout and frown
I am one lucky man
In either suit or gown
And this my friend
I tell you
Is the true low-down
That love is the only thing
That really turns me on

Love (music) (dance)
Love (music) (dance)
Love (music) (dance)

Love is the only thing
That really turns me on

Sure, a pretty face
Can make my heart beat race
And sure a little touch
Can make my pants dance (uh)
And cleavage is a privilege
That is such a rush
But in the end it all doesn’t matter much…

For when I see a man who is handsome and tan
I may feel a little tweak in my libido plan
And when I see a woman who is hot and movin’
My face may burn hot while my pants start cooin’
But these feelins don’t contain my identity
I’m probably not the one for either he or she
If they don’t produce that inner, inner energy
I’m better off jackin’ off to MTV

Michaelangelo had his David
And Homer Achilles
Proust and Oscar Wilde
Were genius embodied
And Shakespeare, if you read him
You would think he were queer
And yet the modern world
Wants to destroy what is dear

For we all have this curiosity
And some try to hide it with insecurities
But everybody has that necessity
That strong emotion
That will shake my body

And though I might be different
May not have your range
Still, that sweet emotion
Rocks me the same
My scope is in that hope
Of every woman and man
It seeks that strong emotion
That no body can stand

Love is the only thing that turns me on
Love is the only thing that turns me on
Love is the only thing that turns me on
Love, Love, Love, Love, Love, Love, Love
It turns me on

Love is the only thing
That turns me on
I know it sounds kind of strange
But it’s the road I’m on
Some may say my way
Is once upon upon
But love is the only thing
That really turns me on

I really don’t care about when I get old
Some love for this reason, or so I am told
I love because it puts my whole body in motion
It chills my brain and skin-- causes sweet emotion
So never be afraid to love a man
Never be afraid to love a strong woman
Never be afraid to love who you love
For life is pain and hardship--- answered in this love

And though a sexy strip
May make me go drip, drip
And though some lingerie
Suggests a beautiful trip
Let me leave you
With this one hard earned tip
If you want to live in life
Just be looking for it

Because a pretty face
Can make a heartbeat race
But it’s only that emotion
That can make me chase
I cannot quite explain how it comes about
All I know is this
It’s what it’s all about

Love is the only thing
That turns me on
I know it sounds kind of strange
But it’s the road I’m on
Some may say my way
Is once upon upon
But love is the only thing
That really turns me on.

And though some might answer
C’mon, C’mon
Unwilling to listen
To this road I’m on
I tell them there’s no choice
That this is my voice
God gave us all a choice
To speak in love’s one voice

Love is the only thing
It’s what we’re all about
Love is the only thing
It’s what we need to shout
Love Is the only thing
So if you feel it, come out
Because to deny it
Is to be without

The Lone Wolf

2010-02-02T16:58:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I’m alone
Like the lone wolf
No matter where I roam
It’s my own truth
No matter how I howl
At the sight of the moon
Emptiness surrounds
The sound of my own tune

Jaywalker

2010-01-24T16:19:00.000-08:00

This song is dedicated to Clarice. When I was in Philadelphia, Clarice and I talked about doing a musical with a song about Jaywalking. The more I thought about the idea, the more I liked it--- especially when I realized that the idea of "jaywalking" fit perfectly in the theme of my musical. This song is pretty simple, but I think it has what will be regarded as one of the great lines in the history of musical theater. I warn you that it's really quite dirty, but it's meant to be in good fun... the character who sings this song is really a hoot. I know it's not anything like what you were expecting, Clarice--- but it's going to be a really funny song and a perfect introduction for this character.

-P

------

Jaywalker

I’m a Jaywalker
Heavyweight talker

I’m a Jaywalker
Featherweight walker

I’m a Jaywalker
Beautiful stalker

For when times are impossibly hard…
There’s just some laws you have to
(mmm) (mmm)
Disregard.

A pretty boy came out in front of my yard
He said he heard I was a bit of a bard
I replied my boy that’s what I am
I’ve written songs for both the ladies and men

He said well sir I have a big issue
And I’m not sure what else there is I can do
For my times are impossibly hard
And because of that I’m really quite scarred

I said my boy there is no need for tears
Have a beer my solution is near
For whenever times are ever so hard
There’s just some laws one has to disregard

Just be
Jaywalking
No need for talking

Just be
Jaywalking
Not crying or squawking

Just be
Jaywalking
And good times you’ll be hawking

For when times are impossibly hard
There’s just some laws you have to
(mmm) (mmm)
Disregard.

He was confused
Mistreated and used
A hard-knock life
In the pants of that youth
His reality was
As hard as it long
I said “hmmm...
Can I see what is wrong?”

That pretty boy
Whose life was so hard
I grabbed his hand
To make it so less hard
We all need a lift
Now and often
God’s gift to men
Amen. Amen.

And so that night
We both broke the law
A few careful steps
Until our weapons were drawn
Peace and love
Are the holiest laws
The doors open
Until Bam! it’s less hard.

‘Cause we were
Jaywalking
Up the walls he was clawing

We were
Jaywalking
Until the neighbors were talking

We were
Jaywalking
Every night until morning

For when times are impossibly hard
There’s just some laws one has to
(mmm) (mmm)
Disregard.

That’s my life
It is free from strife
A criminal
In the pants
It’s alright
It stands strong
It stands upright
It stands for love
Both day and night.

So don’t be cruel
With your words and your laws
God gave me grace
If you knew you’d applaud
For my mission
Is not a selfish cause
There’s always two
With the applause in “awws”

And so let’s all say Amen Amen
To a scene a la men a men
For if one never crosses that street
A hard knock life is the curse he will keep

Too many of us think we have these flaws
Unaware of God’s beautiful cause
Boxed in these stupid human cupid laws
I say cross the street, don’t keep it that hard

For a soul has a sexual part
To have sex is a part of God’s art
And to deny it is to tear one apart
And that’s why I be a work of art

You’ve see my nature, you’ve see my style
You heard my song, I hope it made you smile
And if you dare ever cross that street
I promise you my smile you’ll meet.

For I’m a
Jaywalker
Heavyweight talker

I’m a
Jaywalker
Featherweight walker

I’m a
Jaywalker
Beautiful Stalker

For when times are impossibly hard
Oh when times are impossibly hard
I say when times are impossibly hard
There’s just some laws you have to…
(mmm..) (mmm…)
Disregard.

[Chorus]
He’s a Jaywalker
Just moving along
Just walking to the beat
Of his own true song.

He’s a Jaywalker
Just moving along
Just walking to the beat
Of his own true song.

He’s a Jaywalker
Just moving along
Just walking to the beat
Of his own true song…

I had a kiss for the Miss...

2010-01-18T07:28:00.000-08:00

Continuing on with the musical... this is another song that is rather angry. I decided it would be a good idea (considering my musical is about overcoming homophobia in society) to add some of the reality of heterosexual marriage. Again, it's important to remember that these characters turn out okay...

-------------------------------

I had a kiss for the Miss

[He starts]

I had a kiss for the Miss
But there’s no kisses for the Mrs.
Because though I know he’s not it
That doesn’t make me it
Just because the Mrs. needs kisses
(music)

I’m in no rush for the crush
That has to be hush, hush
Because though I know he’s not it
That doesn’t make me it
Just because the Mrs. needs kisses
(music)

Because though you told me of your love
You hid “it” with your tongue
And though with him you may not get it
With me you can forget it.

I had a kiss for the Miss
But there’s no kisses for the Mrs.
Because though I know he’s not it
That doesn’t make me it
Just because the Mrs. needs kisses
(music)

I’m in no rush for the crush
That has to be hush, hush
Because though I know he’s not it
That doesn’t make me it
Just because the Mrs. needs kisses
(music)

For if a Mrs. needs her kisses
There’s only one reply
And that’s “oh no”
Oh no, Oh no, Hell no”
Because if you give that Mrs. her kisses
Say goodbye to the world you know.
(music)

I had a kiss for the Miss
But there’s no kisses for the Mrs.
For how could I expect
Just a little respect
From a woman who said she loved me
(music)

Will I miss you Miss?
Who happens to be a Mrs.
Does a man miss a kiss
That tastes like piss
Does a man love a Mrs. sans kisses.

[Her turn--- each note is extended like the opera---- each line is sung at a higher note and with even more passion--- the key here is not the lyrics but the emotion]

You cannot understand the Agony.

You cannot understand the Agony.

You cannot understand the Agony.

[Back to his turn--- she joins in so that they are both singing with intense emotional depth—he with anger and her with pure emotion--- ideally they each are trying to “sing” over each other, but their voices are beautiful, so again, the audience is left stunned with both beauty and anger]

I had a kiss for the miss
But there’s no kisses for the Mrs. [you
Because though I he’s not it [cannot
That doesn’t make me it [understand
Just because the Mrs. needs kisses [the agony]

I’m in no rush for the crush [You cannot
That has to be hush, hush [understand the agony]
Because though I know he’s not it [You cannot
That doesn’t make me it [understand
Just because the Mrs. needs kisses [the agony]

[Just him]

I hate you, my former “love”
I hate you and your tongue
And I hope you never get it
For with me bitch
You can forget it.

[Stormy music--- a last ditch appeal--- and angry emotions on stage--- music ends--- he storms off--- she’s left crying]

A quote to learn from...

2010-01-18T05:56:00.000-08:00

"When our days become dreary with low-hovering clouds of despair, and when our nights become darker than a thousand midnights, let us remember that there is a creative force in this universe, working to pull down the gigantic mountains of evil, a power that is able to make a way out of no way and transform dark yesterdays into bright tomorrows. Let us realize the arc of the moral universe is long but it bends toward justice." - Martin Luther King, Jr.

----------------------

When I'm asked which way MLK, Jr. would have stood on gay marriage... it's sort of the same reaction as to which way Jesus Christ would stand... Acceptance, Equality and Love means Acceptance, Equality, and Love--- no exceptions.

A tribute to Lady Gaga...

2010-01-18T05:50:00.000-08:00

On Martin Luther King, Jr. day I post a Lady Gaga song. Why?

1) I love her music, 2) This video is amazing, and 3) she was the only A-list celebrity to show up to the National March for Equality event last October and speak in support of marriage equality... I truly respect her for that.

Love... is a criminal charge

2010-01-16T09:57:00.000-08:00

Ok. So I promised you about a song a week, so let's start with a particularly strong song (in my opinion). Now, if you're a friend of mine and you're reading this--- please don't kill me or ditch me!!! I know the lyrics of this song are rather angry and negative... but trust me, it works in the overall scheme. As I currently envision the musical.. all of the characters, including this one, turn out okay--- with the exception of the Pope--- who gets eaten by an alligator. ;-P

Now, although I don't agree with the overall theme of the song, I think many can identify with it... heck, I've had days when I can identify with it, and well, there is quite a bit of honesty to it (in my experience). I think this is probably the most intense song ever written for Broadway, but I think it works quite well. This is one of those songs where the audience goes "wow"... after they recover.

If you're trying to fit it to music... look at the chorus... extend "Love" so that the time to sing that one word is the same time it takes to sing the next line... and envision it sung by a female singer who can really belt a note and sing with crescendo. It's hard for me to write how you transition to the following stanzas, but it should make sense if you're rhythmically inclined.

for example:

"Luuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhv
Is a criminal charge"
Every man is at large
So take care of that heart

[Two intense musical beats]

Luuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhv
It will rip you apart
So when every man is at large
Take good care of that heart."

Ok... here it is... the chorus and beat are excellent--- secondary lyrics are bound to change a bit. Lady actresses must be sexy, dressed sexy, and dancing high quality and sexy throughout--- and be able to sing. This is not sexist-- it's entertainment.... See "Cell Block Tango" ;-P
--------------------------------------------

Love... Is a Criminal Charge

Love!
Is a criminal charge
Every man is at large
So take care of that heart!

Love!
It will rip you apart
So when every man is at large
Take good care of that heart!

Want to be a victim?
Then just go with him…
(music)

He will fill you with lies
Until you’re filled to the brim…
(music)

And as you’re lying there…
Only thinking of him
(music)

He’s thinking of Bonnie or Ruth
Or maybe even Tim…
(music)

So watch out, boys
‘Cause I’ve had enough
(music)

Enough! Enough! Enough!
Of this love “snuff”
(music)

Enough of love
That which raises a prick
(music)

Because trust me, loves
Love is a cock of shit
(music)

Love!
Is a criminal charge
Every man is at large
So take care of that heart

Love!
It will rip you apart
So when every man is at large
Take good care of that heart!

I was once in love
I was a beautiful dove
(music)

Innocent,
White as a winter glove
(music)

Just him and me
For all eternity
(music)

Oh how did I feel?
Just like a movie reel
(music)

But then he “came” one day
All smiles and glow
(music)

Sweetly comforting me
The sweet “nothings”, you know
(music)

That night I found a text
From a friend named Suzanne
(music)

Next you know, I’m his ex
Love’s not meant for a man
(music)

[Joined by dancers]

Love!
Is a criminal charge
Every man is at large
So take care of that heart

Love!
It will rip you apart
So when every man is at large
Take good care of that heart.

[Dancer 1]

I was young and foolish
At the end of high school

(music)

Looking for a Romeo
With the body of Zeus

(music)

I met a boy
He said “I love you, my joy”

(music)

Oh Roy? Oh Roy? Oh Roy?
What became of you, Roy?

(music)

For as the months passed
As did the years…
(music)

The times changed
And it wasn’t careers…
(music)

For oh Roy, oh Roy,
My first lover boy
(music)

After five years, six months, and two days,
He was no longer a boy

(music)

[All together]

Love!
Is a criminal charge
Every man is at large
So take care of that heart!

Love!
It will rip you apart
So when every man is at large
Take good care of that heart!

(music)

[Dancer 2]

I tell you, sisters,
I had it worse
(music)

I was beautiful
And so I was cursed
(music)

I went out to dance
Lookin’ pretty and fine
(music)

Hopin’ a special someone
Could show me a time
(music)

And so one came
And so one “came”

The first boy to approach me
I was young and insane

He said he loved me
He loved the way that I looked

Two STDs later
And I’m still on his hook…

For ladies, ladies,
Please listen to me

Listen! Listen!
If you want to be free!

He might smell of money
He might treat you with wine

He might buy you flowers
And say you are “mine”

He might use “love”
He might abuse you with “love”

But in the name of love
Love is a fucking hell!

Love!
Is a criminal charge
Every man is at large
So take care of that heart

Love!
It will rip you apart
So when every man is at large
Take good care of that heart

[A full set of music without lyrics featuring lots of extremely sexy, but angry, dancing]
(music) (music) (music)

I’ve seen them all
Handsome and tall
(music)

I’ve seen them all
Both the big and the small
(music)

Wrap you in their arms
Hold you tight
(music)

The screen fades to black
‘Cause love happens at night!
(music)

For that’s right
It’s time for love’s call
(music)

Up as the cock
Hard as the cannonball
(music)

Cuckoo cuckoo
Love pours into you
(music)

Until his genetic code
Points to, well, get a clue…
(music)

For the truth about love
Listen close, my dears
(music)

Is love’s time is up
When he doesn’t get “it” up.
(music)

I know it’s sad,
But sadly, it’s true

As the cock sings “Bonjour”
So too the “Love Adieu”

[Dancer 1]
Love….
(Music)

[Dancer 2]
Love….
(Music)

[Lead Actress]
Love…
(music)

[All together]
Love!!!!!!

Love!
Is a criminal charge
Every man is at large
So take care of that heart

Love!
It will rip you apart
So when every man is at large
Take good care of that heart

[Lead Actress]
So don’t be a sucker
Don’t give into his shit
(music)

[Dancer 1]
Don’t be a sucker
Love is a cock of shit
(music)

[Dancer 2]
It’s his fantasy way
Of whetting your clit
(music)

[Lead actress]
And if you think it’s more
You’re as naïve as shit.
(music)

For tell me, honey
Wet with those words of honey
(music)

Do you find it funny
When he’s gone, you dummy
(music)

For his prick, my dear,
Has lost interest in you
(music)

I know it’s mean
But that’s the love adieu….
(music)

Love!
Love!
Love!
[extremely fast paced]
Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love!
Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love!
Bulllshit!

[All together]
Wanna be a victim?
Then just go with him!!!!

Wanna get ripped up?
Then just go with him!!!

Wanna lose your mind…
Then just go with him!!!!

Because as you’re lying there
Only thinking of him

He’ll be lying, lying, lying,
Lying, Lying, Lying….

Because, to a man…
Love is the penis’s whim.

[a few sexy/angry dance moves--- Music Finishes]

Another tribute to Kander and Ebb... and Bob Fosse

2010-01-16T09:40:00.000-08:00

This is "Cell Block Tango" from the film version of the musical "Chicago". My song above owes a lot to this song in terms of 1) costume hopes, 2) dancing, and 3) inspiration. Of course, the lyrics and beat are completely different, so don't have this song playing while trying to find the beat of the above song--- however, Chicago is one of the ten greatest musicals in my opinion, and definitely worth seeing if you haven't. My upcoming work owes a lot to it (and to the musical Cabaret which they also did).

-P

I gotta feelin'

2010-01-13T17:30:00.000-08:00

In honor of Clarice--- who said I needed to have a song as catchy and upbeat as this one in my musical--- I will try!!! This is the Black Eyed Peas and their song "I Gotta Feelin'" FYI to Clarice and others, my musical, if you did not yet guess, is, in large part about overcoming homophobia in this society... I think that this is a cause that everyone should promote and fight for whether straight or gay, and goes to the heart of being a good, compassionate person. Frankly, I couldn't imagine anything more "Christian" or frankly "decent", regardless of faith, than loving everyone and ensuring everyone is given the same rights and protection from emotional abuse.

As my own pastor said, if churches do not accept gay marriage, they are seriously jeopardizing their place in society--- because I, like many others, simply cannot see any connection between these churches' view of love and the love Jesus spoke about as documented in the Bible. And when people preach bigotry, it's really hard for me (and others) to view them seriously on just about anything else. So my musical will be about revealing much of this hypocrisy, but will also just be about life--- both the good and the bad--- it will have as much in common with "Chicago" as it does with "Wicked".

Anyway, if you read my blog I am speaking to the choir here--- and I know I owe you lots of songs here to prove to you I am only mildy insane about my goals, but I get inspired over the course of the day for various reasons-- and Clarice pumped me up today. If you watch the video, I hope you watch the entire video. The lone girl that dances is quite beautiful. I hope something like what happens to her happens to me. :-P

Maybe This Time

2010-01-09T11:44:00.000-08:00

From the film version of the musical Cabaret: a must-see for anyone interested in musicals. It is interesting that this film was done in 1972 and yet features the same themes that my musical will have... I think Liza Minnelli is just fantastic, and the music from Kander and Ebb ("Chicago" & "New York, New York") is definitely something I'm going to borrow from. In short, this movie is inspirational to me.

I brought this film home for Thanksgiving for my family to see, and I was amazed when my dad started singing along to the music (truly amazed).

-P

FYI: I'm going to try to publish about a song a week for the next few weeks. Some of the songs I am going to post are going to be filled with angst and some of these are going to have strong messages that I do not endorse. I just hope that you realize these are songs for my musical, and that, as in any plot, the characters must make mistakes--- so please don't judge me or rush to my aid thinking I'm going through a rough time... it's just me writing a musical. And by the way, thanks for reading... it may not make sense until I post the plot (maybe in February), but it helps having readers--- it keeps me motivated. So thanks!!!

New Year's Resolution

2010-01-09T10:32:00.000-08:00

Hey y'all,

Sorry I haven't posted in a while. These are two of my goals for 2010:

1) To write the story and lyrics for a Broadway caliber musical. The first draft is to be finished by my birthday (July 3). I will also, before the end of the year, be actively looking for an individual who shares its vision to partner with me in adding the music to it. I hope to have it on Broadway by 2015.

2) To publish some kids poetry. Eventually, my goal is to publish a kids book: "Know Them Through Poems: The Illustrated Book of Animals", and hopefully have a "Know Them Through Poems" series where kids learn about various subjects through rhyme.

I think these are two good goals for this coming year which will be fairly easy to measure. In early July, I'll assess just how successful the musical is. I know the Broadway by 2015 goal sounds unrealistic, but it's my goal, and I'm going to work my butt off to make it happen. Wish me luck! :-)

-Peyton

Kori Bustard: Animal Poem #102

2009-12-18T05:21:00.000-08:00

The story of the Kori Bustard
Is of a bird who follows the great big herd
Of all the birds he is the biggest flying bird
But instead of people, he eats bugs
Isn’t that absurd?

Don't Stop Believin'...

2009-12-18T05:15:00.000-08:00

Thanks to Matt for making me aware of this on his blog, and to Katie, whose ringtone always cracks me up...

Glee - Don't Stop Believe
Uploaded by Bugabookas. - Classic TV and last night's shows, online.

Let's make Love our case

2009-12-04T05:34:00.000-08:00

When life seems dark and strange
And you’re told people do not change
Read Love upon a face
And see the power to change this place.
I know, in any case,
It took a lot for me to change
So to every face in every place
Let’s make Love our case.

Dog: Animal Poem #101

2009-12-04T05:30:00.001-08:00

Everybody needs a buddy
Everybody needs a friend
Everybody needs somebody
Whose love does not depend

So when hard times are upon us
Or unhappy tears descend
You can always call on me
For I will always be your friend

Everybody needs a buddy
Everybody needs a friend
Everybody needs somebody
Who will be there in the end

For as fears may come upon us
And the clouds of doubt surround
There's one path that’s never muddied
It’s the peace that love has found!

Everybody needs a buddy
Everybody needs a friend
Everybody needs somebody
Whose compassion has no end

So on days when life seems funny
And when no one seems around
Know of what your love has done for me
So that my love now has no bounds!

Everybody needs a buddy
Everybody needs a friend
Everybody needs somebody
Whose love will never end

So when hard times are upon us
Or unhappy tears descend
You can always call me “Buddy”
Because you named me that, my friend!

-----------------

I modified a previous poem--- because when I think of dogs, I think of a "buddy" who is always by one's side. I hope you like this modification--- if not, please let me know. -P

Badger: Animal Poem #100

2009-11-25T05:35:00.000-08:00

The badger is not bad
Don’t say that
It makes him sad!
For some of the best times I have had
Have been with my badger lad!

The badger is just mad
That beavers are the fad!
He’s jealous
(just a tad)
But that does not mean he’s bad!

For he is my favorite lad
As furry as my dad!
And I am always glad
To be with
My badger lad!

Rat: Animal Poem #99

2009-11-25T05:32:00.000-08:00

I was whisked
By the whiskers
Of a big, fat, rat!
Who crawled
Through the walls
Going rat-a-tat-tat!

My mommy
Waited hither
With a big, brown, bat
Because he gave her
The jitters
Going rat-a-tat-tat!

She waited and she sat
With her big, brown, bat
Tightening her grip
With every rat-a-tat-tat
She blathered and she blithered
“Oh come out, rat!”
As she was quite mad
With that big, brown, bat!

I remember the day
She bought our sixteenth cat!
He was quite mean
Supposed to catch fat rats
But I remember the day
When I heard that “splat”!
Another cat off the roof
Sixteen flat cats!

So now she had
Had enough of cats
The same as she had
Had enough of rats!
And so she sat there
With her baseball bat
Blathering and blithering
“Oh come out, rat!”

And just then out
Came that big, fat, rat
Out popped her veins
Can you imagine that?
She swung and she swung
That baseball bat
All around the house
She chased that rat!

She swung that bat
Off the rack went the hats!
She swung that bat
Knocked the couch off the mat!
She swung that bat
Now our TV is flat!
She swung that bat
Mortal rat combat!

And just as she had
Finished smashing our beds
Afraid I was
That my rat was dead!
That was until
My favorite rat
Snuck up and gave me
A toe love pat!

So now as she sits on the floor complaining
Of how it’s cold or how it’s raining
I’m whisked by the whiskers of my big fat rat
For just the thought of him
Is so entertaining!

Brown Bear: Animal Poem #98

2009-11-23T19:41:00.000-08:00

Outside in calm and peaceful air
There walks a very special bear
So special we all stop and stare
As the brown haired bear walks here
To there.

Why do we all stop and stare?
At the sight of this peculiar bear
It has little to do with just the bear
And everything to do with what
He wears!

For have you ever seen a bear
Who walks around in underwear?
And not just any underwear
But bright, pink hearted,
Underwear?

For his underwear is colored white
But bright pink hearts are really bright!
And thus he wears those hearts so tight
His butt is pink, and in a blink,
So Tight!

So we can’t help but sit and stare
And wink at this pink hearted bear
For that’s a peculiar thing he wears
And we wonder if he says,
“Who cares!”

That was until he came one day
To the place we often sit and stay
He looked at us in a funny way
And he told us he had this
To say:

“You there make me so antsy!
First, I am a she not he,
And, two, to mention, obviously,
They’re not underwear, but my best
Panties!”

And ever since we’ve called him she
Though some still think that she’s a he
To this you won’t hear a peep from me
But to say pink hearts have such
Beauty.

Ferret: Animal Poem #97

2009-11-23T19:39:00.000-08:00

Do not even try us!
You cannot get it by us!
We know you have a bias!
We can see it in your iris!

If you see someone who’s tall
Do you think of basketball?
And when you see someone who’s small
Do you think the munchkin ball?

When you see someone who’s black
Do you think perhaps of rap?
And when you see someone who’s white
Do you know that guy’s uptight?

We all have our perceptions
They come without exception
It’s a personal deception
That has plagued us since conception!

So do not even try us
We know you have a bias
The best we can do is try to
Recognize each bias!

For when we realize
The first thoughts that come to mind
Only then can we realize
The bias in our eyes!

For someone who is tall
May not be good at sports at all
And someone who is small
May be the best at basketball!

Someone who is black
May listen to opera tracks
And someone who is white
On the dance floor may be “tight”

For when we get to know
An individual
Then we get to learn
That looks can’t tell us all!

As you may look like he or she
But a personality
Is not like a he or she
They are as different as can be!

So if you now can bear it
This bias, we all wear it!
Try to be like the ferrets
They only judge us on our merits!

Ram: Animal Poem #96

2009-11-23T19:35:00.000-08:00

Rams love slamming heads
It’s the first thing they do when they get out of bed!
They go “WHAM!” and “BAM!” and “SLAM!”…“K’BAM!”
It’s as though their heads were made of lead!

I once asked a ram if he needed a break
But the ram replied that they don’t have brakes!
He told me that when he begins his charge
He’s energized like an electric charge!

And then I asked him of the blows he takes
After so many blows will those big horns break?
He looked up and said, “they will never break!”
But then had to leave me, because,
He had the worst headache!

Yeti: Animal Poem #95

2009-11-23T19:23:00.001-08:00

“Is it time to come out?”

Not yet!

“But I want to come out!”

Not yet!
I’ve told you times too plenty!
Until you finish your mom’s spaghetti!
You are not allowed outside,
Mr. Yeti!

Octopus: Animal Poem #94

2009-11-23T19:20:00.000-08:00

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight
Look at my tentacles, aren’t they great?
You are really lucky that I have just ate
As my suckers as utensils are really first rate!

Oh! What a spectacle are my long tentacles!
And my egg-shaped head is just exceptional!
Yellow, brown, orange, and even types of red
There are so many different colors I like to change my head!

As who is all the fuss?
Why it’s me, the octopus!
Who should you discuss?
Why not me, the octopus?
Who is venomous?
Well, that’s me, the octopus!
Is it bad we’re venomous?
Maybe for you, but not for us!

As we, the octopus, use our venom as a plus
It helps us to eat; clams taste really good to us!
So with a jet stream, we drive strong just like a bus
Sailing with eight arms, the ocean’s good to us!

So I’m sure you have guessed it, but you know we’re really smart
We are a work of art: eight arms, three hearts!
And before you blink, I could fill your face with ink
Because if you try to eat me, my ink is what you’ll drink!

So excuse me now, for I really have to go
It’s getting late, and I see little clams below
And as you are not a sucker and won’t get stuck inside my suckers
I will go shuck some clams; my beak loves those tasty suckers!

Goose: Animal Poem #93

2009-11-23T18:59:00.001-08:00

We geese are geeks
Or so that’s what they say
And if this is true
We wouldn’t want it another way
For if being a geek
Is being creative when we play
Then we’re happy being geeks
Every single happy day!

Praying Mantis: Animal Poem #92

2009-11-23T18:55:00.000-08:00

The men are hiding, praying
As the women keep on slaying
For the ladies’ hungry preying
Keep the men all run away-ing!

All you praying men
Stay away from lady beds
As those pretty women preying
Like to feed before egg-laying!

You may want to kiss her
But if you do watch out your head
For at the moment you do kiss her
She may bite right off your head!

It’s just the ladies’ nature
They say “off with all their heads”!
But most men are just so stupid
They keep visiting their beds!

So listen to me, Mister
I am your favorite sister!
And I do not want to miss you
So don’t be kissing pretty Misses!

She might promise you some bliss
At the moment of that kiss
But before you even know it
It’s your own head you will miss!

She’s beautiful, but,
She’s the one you can’t kiss!
Watch out, boys,
For the praying mantis!

---------------

Earthworm: Animal Poem #91

2009-11-23T18:54:00.000-08:00

Earthworms squirm throughout the earth
They have been squirming since their birth
A lot of secrets they unearth
When all they have is a lot of dirt!

Black Bear: Animal Poem #90

2009-11-21T11:05:00.000-08:00

Somewhere, far away,
Some say there lives these bears
With fur as black as coal
But a beauty pure and fair
Some say all be aware
Of what is happening to these bears
There is a horrible disease
And it’s killing many bears!
We may not have a cure
But we have the smarts and wares
If only we just cared
We could save these good black bears!
So though you may never meet one
And they live so far away
Some black bears need your help
Do you care about these bears?

Komodo Dragon: Animal Poem #89

2009-11-21T11:00:00.000-08:00

Leathery scales from head to tail
And a dignified black snout
Curly claws on massive paws
And sharp teeth within that snout!

If you see him, take refuge!
For this lizard is real huge!
He’s really big, like really big
Just one bite can kill a pig!

It’s as though a wizard
Made a lizard
But this lizard is no myth!
He’s just the biggest lizard of all
Of the greatest length and greatest width!

And from his snout
A tongue is sprung
It’s fork-like as two prongs
It’s sticky strong
And really long
As in over one foot long!

He points his head into the air
To prove he doesn’t care
For he knows he’s cool
Has lizard rule
Is sharp and debonair!

A leathery neck, black eyes to check
If animals grace the scene
His saliva will not keep you alive
It’s poisonous and it’s mean!

For just a bite will kill all right!
Bad bacteria in every bite!
And if you die out of his sight
He’ll smell you in the night!

But that’s okay, it’s just his way
All animals have to eat
And as his tail has massive sway
He crawls to dragon beat.

And so he crawls, and so he moves
To the beat of the Komodo groove
So move to the groove, I do approve
Of the bandwagon of the Komodo dragon!

Chimpanzee: Animal Poem #88

2009-11-20T12:22:00.000-08:00

Suzi, the chimpanzee
Writes about her life in a diary
She writes of what she does and sees
As she sees a whole lot living high in the trees!

Up in those trees, Suzi sees
Okapi, topi, and manatees!
And she’s hears a lot of “thanks” and “please”
Though monkeys are not as polite as chimpanzees!

She jumps around and she swings around
She is glad of all the things she’s found!
In school she learns how to make new tools
And with her friends she studies frogs that drool!

And in those trees, Suzi swings
She swings as though she came with wings!
One-handed, huge leaps, amazing things!
As chimpanzees are like trapezes--- swinging to them is soooo easy!

And after each amazing day
Suzi thinks of what she did that day
And whether it caused her fright or glee
She writes about it in her diary!

As Suzi sees so many things
You can’t help but see as a chimpanzee!
And that’s why she likes her diary
It’s a place to express all her curiosity!

So before she rests to get her zzzzs
She opens up that diary
And writes some words just like these:
“This chimpanzee does not like cheese!”

Blowfish: Animal Poem #87

2009-11-20T12:19:00.000-08:00

The blowfish
Is a fish
On a mission

To save
The human race
From its own volition

So now
Gather around
And listen!

To a message
More powerful
Than nuclear fission!

Love! Love! Love! Love! Love!
All you really need is Love!
Love! Love! Love! Love! Love!
Say it again!
Just Love!

Love your friends and family
Love your neighbors too
Love can’t be a stranger
When there’s so much Love in you!

Love the crocodiles
Love the fishes too
Spread your Love for miles
So the earth is happy too!

Love! Love! Love! Love! Love!
All you really need is Love!
Love! Love! Love! Love! Love!
Say it again!
Just Love!

Each time a human litters
A neon fish loses a bit of its glitter
And each time one over-fishes
Say goodbye to ocean riches!

Each time human love doesn’t show up
The blowfish wants to throw up!
But one can’t, so until we grow up
The blowfish has to blow up!

So let’s respect our friends and family
Let’s respect the earth we have
For each time the blowfish blows up
That makes a blowfish sad!

Let’s listen to her mission
And have a new volition
To Love this earth we live in
And make Love the human mission!

Love! Love! Love! Love! Love!
All we really need is Love!
Love! Love! Love! Love! Love!
Say it every day:
Just LOVE!

As a blowfish is on a race
To save our human race
And if we don’t listen to her mission
We may lose this earth, our place!

So let’s listen to her mission
And save the human race
LOVE the earth! Our friends! Our family!
I don’t want to live in outer space!

Viper: Animal Poem #86

2009-11-18T18:48:00.000-08:00

Over there and yonder
Where the tree line meets the clover
And the neighbors’ dog named Rover
Likes to knock over the roses
A nasty, rancid odor
Of the type most malodorous
Is reaching for our noses
And its grip just won’t ignore us!

Phew! and Eww! and Oooh!
It smells a lot like poo!
What is one to do
With a smell like stinky shoes?

And so the village gathered
All the girls and all the boys
They came with great ideas
But we spoke in quiet voice
We debated, but decided
On an idea both right and true
We would write her mother
To repel that smell like poo!

We tried to be decorous
To be gentle in our views
But the smell was so odorous
That we had to break the news!
So after much discussion
We had an idea to put to use
And so we thus did write her:
“Baby viper needs a diaper!”

Wombat: Animal Poem #85

2009-11-16T18:05:00.000-08:00

Wombat butt!
Wombat butt!
Rock hard
As a coconut!

Open door!
Close it shut!
The butt’s the door
For the wombat hut!

Hut! Hut! Hut!
Wombat butt!
Hut! Hut! Hut!
Wombat butt!

When it’s 4th and Goal
You know what’s up?
The call of the play
Of the wombat butt!

Dingoes go to the wombat hut
Because they like to chew on wombat guts
But the hole to the hut’s been specially cut
Just the size of a wombat’s butt!

And though dingoes have canine teeth
The wombat butt’s too hard to eat!
Imagine the shell of a coconut
Even harder is that wombat butt!

So when the dingoes come to eat
The butt’s the door those dingoes meet
And if one knocks the butt might greet
With a knockout butt and a knockout beat!

A butt to the face
Puts dingoes in their place!
A butt to the face
Is like a dingo mace!

A butt to the face
Not allowed in this place!
A butt to the face
Go away dingo face!

So now you know of the strongest butt
I’m referring to the wombat’s butt!
For wombat’s butts are hard and tough
They act just like a door slammed shut!

So when you see the wombat strut
With a butt as hard as a coconut
Know that is one cocky strut
For a wombat is proud of a wombat butt!

Butterfly: Animal Poem #84

2009-11-16T18:03:00.000-08:00

Butterflies
Are the flowers of the sky
Their wings are petals
They bring life to where they settle
They pollinate,
Which means new flowers they create
Their beauty’s great
It’s joy they thus create.

Butterflies
Have a power in their eyes
They stretch for freedom
They are bright without disguise
With those antennas
They have all of my attention
For in my eyes
Beauty is a butterfly.

Pony: Animal Poem #83

2009-11-14T11:04:00.000-08:00

Have you met
Anyone
As fortunate as me?

“Not me!”
“Not I!”
“You’re one lucky pony!”

Have you met
Anyone
Who is richer than me?

“Not me!”
“Not I!”
“You’re one wealthy pony!”

No, I don’t have gold
And I don’t have cash
No, I don’t have silver
Nor a secret stash!

I don’t have money
And I don’t have dimes
I am one broke pony
Who is broke all the time!

And yet
I bet
You have never met
A pony as lucky as me!

For you see
What I lack
I get a billion times back
From the riches in the love
Of my friends and family!

And a love that comes
From my friends and family
Is worth all the gold in the world
It’s invaluable, but free!

Snake: Animal Poem #82

2009-11-14T11:02:00.000-08:00

Eat lots and lots and lots of cake
As long as you don't have to bake!
But know what’s in that fluffy dough
I heard in cakes there lives a snake!

Drake the snake did not mistake
The day he woke within a cake
Most snakes partake in rats and mice
But Drake the snake prefers good cake!

He hides within each fluffy cake
Each flavor gives him happy shakes
Of every model, of every make
He loves to eat; he loves those cakes!

So before you stick a plastic fork
Into a “Happy Birthday” cake
Look out for that fork-like tongue
Drake the snake hides in those cakes!

Sea Anemone: Animal Poem #81

2009-11-14T10:56:00.000-08:00

Don’t be my enemy
Mr. Sea anemone!
Just be my friend
I am nice and friendly!

At every single party
You’re always in one place!
I ask you to come dance
But it’s hard to read your face!

You wave those funny tentacles
When I just want to snuggle!
I hope one day eventually
A smile I might smuggle!

But, nope, you just wave those arms
And tell me manly things
I know of sports you’re really smart
But I want you to be daring!

For how can you say you’re really fun
Always sitting on that bun?
I can’t imagine how much fun
One could have upon one’s bun!

So come on now and dance with me!
Mr. Sea anemone!
Dance and shake your body free!
Fun is a bun on a shaking spree!

But no? You still won’t dance with me?
Mr. Sea Anemone
One day I hope you’ll dance with me
I’m a lady---Not your enemy!

My door is open...

2009-11-11T17:59:00.000-08:00

My door is open
To camels and llamas
To chimpanzee mommas
And beavers with problems!

My door is open
To aye-ayes in trees
To snakes without knees
And bugs that eat pee!

My door is open
To heavyweight whales
To ugly brown snails
And shower-less males!

My door is open
To kittens and puppies
To tadpoles and guppies
And even some yuppies!

My door is open
To all sorts of critters
To those that cause jitters
Or poop in the litter!

But most of all
It’s open to you
For as my dear friend
I truly love you.

------------

In September, I started exclusively writing animal poems, because I realized that my "serious" poems can hurt people I deeply care about. It doesn't matter if one is the greatest artist in the world, if one doesn't have friends, that person doesn't have much of anything. For the record, to those I have said I love, or to those who believe I love them, I still love you--- I don't stop loving people, it's probably impossible for me to do so--- the people I love I love for a strong reason--- acceptance, friendship, support, xoxo, just the fact that they truly care about me and I care about them, or that their influence helped change my life... it's not just emotional... it's more than that... there is something strong I have gained from my relationships--- over the past year or two alone I have matured dramatically as a person, and much of it's because of my friends and family. Anyway, I want to save the "thank you" friends post for a later date... but I am truly grateful for my friends (and family), and given very recent information I felt compelled to write this now. Every night, as in, about an hour from now, I always pray--- you know me, I believe in God--- and well, I always, always, always focus on the people I love, and I don't think anything has ever comforted me as much as knowing that I am not alone in this world, because good people have entered or are currently in my life, and these are the people I get my hope and inspiration from. Seriously, if I am ever in a down mood, I say inside "I love ____" and this really picks me up. I am grateful for the community of people who have given me their love and support... truly grateful for you. Thanks. :-)

With Love,

-Peyton

"We go back to back to back when the wolves attack
Because we know back to back to back is how we send them back"

A Thank You To Our Veterans

2009-11-11T05:34:00.000-08:00

This month I would like to post about some people I am truly grateful for. Today, on veterans' day, I offer huge thanks to the veterans of our country. I personally owe a huge debt to those who have fought for my freedom... my freedom to be safe, my freedom to be happy, my freedom to even write this silly poetry. I offer the greatest thanks to disabled veterans-- words cannot describe my debt to you. Thank you.

The following song is entitled "I Saw What I Saw" by Sara Groves. I believe the video is a poignant tribute to our men and women who have served or are currently serving in the armed forces. To those veterans I personally know (although I don't know if you read this blog), a big and special thank you to you. And for those who have died for our country, I will be thinking of your sacrifice today.

"I saw what I saw and I can't forget it
I heard what I heard and I can't go back
I know what I know and I can't deny it

Something on the road, cut me to the soul

Your pain has changed me
your dream inspires
your face a memory
your hope a fire
your courage asks me what I'm afraid of
(what I am made of)
and what I know of love

we've done what we've done and we can't erase it
we are what we are and it's more than enough
we have what we have but it's no substitution

Something on the road, touched my very soul

I say what I say with no hesitation
I have what I have and I'm giving it up
I do what I do with deep conviction

Something on the road, changed my world"

Spider: Animal Poem #80

2009-11-08T11:10:00.000-08:00

No insect is wiser than the spider
She is tricky with that very sticky web
You may think you are flying right by her
But before you know it you are stuck within her web!

That icky, sticky, silky, spider web
Is not the place you want to call your bed!
For it’s sticky, and it’s icky, and it’s tricky
Before you know it there’s a spider in that bed!

That spider web is truly beautiful
Miles of thread woven has a magic pull
But no matter if your life is plain or dull
It won’t get better in a web that’s magical!

For not all beauty is meant to be seen
And if you get stuck, you’ll know what I mean
A spider’s web is meant to catch dummies
And if a dummy, you’ll feel crummy and be yummy!

So do not be the very yummy fly!
Do not sing my dummy lullaby!
For no insect is wiser than a spider
The last words of the last great house-fly writer!

Frog: Animal Poem #79

2009-11-08T11:07:00.000-08:00

On an early morning jog
I ran into a fog
As black as black gunpowder
And as thick as Boston chowder

I heard a lonely sob
My heart began to throb
For if the sound was from a slob
It was a very lovely slob!

I hastened up my jog
Ran straight into the bog
Fell over a big log
It hurt… so now I sobbed!

But then it came again
Resounding from that log
“Rib-bit” “Rib-bit” again!
Ripped my heart that “Rib-bit” sob!

The man of all my dreams
Was hiding near that log!
I could not see in foggy cream
So I snorted as a hog!

And that is when he came
Out hopping to my side
“Rib-bit”, “Rib-bit” again
My dream-man is a frog!