Three songs that make me think/ want to believe in, heaven...
"This Land", from The Lion King, by Hans Zimmer
End Songs... Gladiator by Lisa Gerrard and Hans Zimmer
End Credits, Braveheart, James Horner
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Tune of the Day
12 hours ago
Monday, February 16, 2009
In memory of Jon Lucks: An argument against the death penalty
In both middle school and high school, I was a state champion public speaking champion as well as a big proponent of debating. Throughout that time, I thought I knew everything. Nobody debated subjects like "abortion", "the death penalty", "euthanasia", "who started WWI?", and other subjects, with as much zeal as me. I thought my arguments were rock-solid: 1) because I didn't think anyone thought about these issues as much as I did, and 2) nobody, in my opinion, had ever "defeated me" in a debate.
When I went home for the holidays this past year, my parents and I were engaged in one of our typical debates/discussions, and I asked them if they had ever changed their opinions on any issue. In response, they threw the question back at me: "have you changed your opinion on any issue?" And, well, it didn't take long for all of us to realize that there may not be a single issue that I haven't changed my mind on. And yeah, I had a wry smile when we realized this. I have Jon Lucks to thank for a bit of that smile. :-)
Jon Lucks is the first person to ever change my mind on a major issue. Admittedly, on some issues, Jon and I had major disagreements. Jon was one of those crazy libertarians who worked at the Cato Institute (a libertarian think-tank). Among the many things he believed that have me rolling my eyes (even to this day) were his views that Hillary Clinton is probably the anti-christ, Tom Brady is a closet homosexual, and Allen Iverson is the greatest basketball player to have ever lived. He is also the only disabled person I have ever known who was adamantly opposed to the Americans with Disabilities Act. Along with these sometimes humorous views, and tendency towards Philly fan insanity, there were two issues that Jon really campaigned hard for: 1) fair trade coffee (maybe because the leaders of that group were super-cute), and 2) the death penalty.
In high school and in my Freshman year of college, I was very much in support of the death penalty. I could imagine someone very close to me being murdered or raped, and I put myself into the shoes of a family member of a victim. If that were me, I thought, I wouldn't just want that person killed, I would want that person tortured. I imagined the Osama Bin Ladens and the Hitlers of the world, and reasoned, shouldn't we have the death penalty available for these evil men? Wouldn't it be a crime not to punish these people via death? Don't the families deserve that? I saw the death penalty as the most reasonable sentence for someone who deliberately causes the death of another person.
However, Jon changed my mind. This is Jon's argument, and I have thought about it a lot, but I have never been able to find an argument that trumps it. I ask that if you believe in the death penalty that you think about his argument and compare it with your views. And, if you still believe that the death penalty is necessary, please let me know where Jon's argument is inherently flawed so that I may reconsider my personal views accordingly.
In summary, this is Jon's view:
"The death penalty is based on the judgment of a human jury. Humans are fallible. It has been proven that innocent people have been killed on death row. If even only 1 out of 100 people on death row are innocent, can you support an institution that kills that one innocent person? Are the 99 executions of the guilty worth the life of even one innocent? Can you design a law that is fool-proof, that ensures only the really, really, really, obviously, guilty people are killed? Really, how can you ensure that innocent people are not killed without ending the death penalty?"
There are many ways to view the issue of the death penalty: people argue it by its cost and also whether the death penalty is a deterrence. Frankly, it's been proven that the death penalty is costlier than a life sentence, and well, I think most would agree that those who commit these horrible acts are not thinking about "the lack of a death penalty" when they commit them. When it comes down to it, I think most people support the death penalty because of the "revenge" factor. That's certainly why I supported it. It's sort of like gay marriage: people argue on "traditional values", but when it comes down to it, people who are against gay marriage have a problem with gays---and the rest is intellectual fluff. The more I discuss these issues, the more I sense this to be true.
And, as a writer, I don't know how you could write a law that would ensure only the really, really, obviously, guilty are put on death row. I've thought about "if it's on video", or "if he's murdered 10+ people", etc., but this line of reasoning gets a bit ridiculous after a while, and never truly reaches the "infallible" point of Jon's argument. Given human nature, it's, in my opinion, impossible to write a law that ensures only the guilty are executed. Additionally, as long as a death penalty is allowed, the potential for it to be abused exists (see Texas). Furthermore, in my opinion, it is also one of the worst crimes imaginable, maybe as bad as the worst serial killer, to have the state execute an innocent person.
Of course, Jon's argument is based on values. I value human life; particularly, innocent human life, and I don't think attempting to appease all of the revenge in the world is worth the death of one innocent. And, yes, I realize that a life sentence for an innocent man is also a terrible tragedy, but I think the state execution of an innocent person is that much worse. Furthermore, I would dare you to write up a law that ensures no innocent person is killed on death row: I don't think it's really possible. I tried to write such a thing, and I failed, that is why Jon "won" our debate: that is why, in my opinion, we both won.
Overall, that is Jon's argument on the death penalty, and it is my way of remembering him... trying to spread his views on an issue he was extremely passionate about. Jon lived an amazing life, yes, a sadly short one, but if you were able to see his Facebook page, you would see just a glimpse of the amount of love created by a life that touched so many people, and who was, obviously, truly loved by many. He was just a good guy. And he helped me to see that I was wrong, which is, well, maybe the first step to being on the right path.
And as he always used to quote his favorite film "The Boondock Saints" (which he had this ridiculuous obsession with like he had with the Eagles)... Jon, buddy, "I'll see you on the flip side."
Love,
-Peyton
Below is a link to Jon Lucks' blog. I had not known Jon had a blog when he was alive, and am amazed now when I'm reading it for the first time. In fact, Jon's blog looks a lot like my blog: he is a huge advocate for both gay rights and against torture. The big difference I see is that Jon had a much more impressive vocabulary than me. :-) If you read his first few posts, you'll see that both his brain and his heart were in the right place. http://jonlucks.blogspot.com/
One of his memoriams can be found here: http://gwenglish.blogspot.com/2008/03/in-memoriam-jon-lucks.html
And his opinion on Ann Coulter here... I had to post this, Jon.
I miss you, Jon.
When I went home for the holidays this past year, my parents and I were engaged in one of our typical debates/discussions, and I asked them if they had ever changed their opinions on any issue. In response, they threw the question back at me: "have you changed your opinion on any issue?" And, well, it didn't take long for all of us to realize that there may not be a single issue that I haven't changed my mind on. And yeah, I had a wry smile when we realized this. I have Jon Lucks to thank for a bit of that smile. :-)
Jon Lucks is the first person to ever change my mind on a major issue. Admittedly, on some issues, Jon and I had major disagreements. Jon was one of those crazy libertarians who worked at the Cato Institute (a libertarian think-tank). Among the many things he believed that have me rolling my eyes (even to this day) were his views that Hillary Clinton is probably the anti-christ, Tom Brady is a closet homosexual, and Allen Iverson is the greatest basketball player to have ever lived. He is also the only disabled person I have ever known who was adamantly opposed to the Americans with Disabilities Act. Along with these sometimes humorous views, and tendency towards Philly fan insanity, there were two issues that Jon really campaigned hard for: 1) fair trade coffee (maybe because the leaders of that group were super-cute), and 2) the death penalty.
In high school and in my Freshman year of college, I was very much in support of the death penalty. I could imagine someone very close to me being murdered or raped, and I put myself into the shoes of a family member of a victim. If that were me, I thought, I wouldn't just want that person killed, I would want that person tortured. I imagined the Osama Bin Ladens and the Hitlers of the world, and reasoned, shouldn't we have the death penalty available for these evil men? Wouldn't it be a crime not to punish these people via death? Don't the families deserve that? I saw the death penalty as the most reasonable sentence for someone who deliberately causes the death of another person.
However, Jon changed my mind. This is Jon's argument, and I have thought about it a lot, but I have never been able to find an argument that trumps it. I ask that if you believe in the death penalty that you think about his argument and compare it with your views. And, if you still believe that the death penalty is necessary, please let me know where Jon's argument is inherently flawed so that I may reconsider my personal views accordingly.
In summary, this is Jon's view:
"The death penalty is based on the judgment of a human jury. Humans are fallible. It has been proven that innocent people have been killed on death row. If even only 1 out of 100 people on death row are innocent, can you support an institution that kills that one innocent person? Are the 99 executions of the guilty worth the life of even one innocent? Can you design a law that is fool-proof, that ensures only the really, really, really, obviously, guilty people are killed? Really, how can you ensure that innocent people are not killed without ending the death penalty?"
There are many ways to view the issue of the death penalty: people argue it by its cost and also whether the death penalty is a deterrence. Frankly, it's been proven that the death penalty is costlier than a life sentence, and well, I think most would agree that those who commit these horrible acts are not thinking about "the lack of a death penalty" when they commit them. When it comes down to it, I think most people support the death penalty because of the "revenge" factor. That's certainly why I supported it. It's sort of like gay marriage: people argue on "traditional values", but when it comes down to it, people who are against gay marriage have a problem with gays---and the rest is intellectual fluff. The more I discuss these issues, the more I sense this to be true.
And, as a writer, I don't know how you could write a law that would ensure only the really, really, obviously, guilty are put on death row. I've thought about "if it's on video", or "if he's murdered 10+ people", etc., but this line of reasoning gets a bit ridiculous after a while, and never truly reaches the "infallible" point of Jon's argument. Given human nature, it's, in my opinion, impossible to write a law that ensures only the guilty are executed. Additionally, as long as a death penalty is allowed, the potential for it to be abused exists (see Texas). Furthermore, in my opinion, it is also one of the worst crimes imaginable, maybe as bad as the worst serial killer, to have the state execute an innocent person.
Of course, Jon's argument is based on values. I value human life; particularly, innocent human life, and I don't think attempting to appease all of the revenge in the world is worth the death of one innocent. And, yes, I realize that a life sentence for an innocent man is also a terrible tragedy, but I think the state execution of an innocent person is that much worse. Furthermore, I would dare you to write up a law that ensures no innocent person is killed on death row: I don't think it's really possible. I tried to write such a thing, and I failed, that is why Jon "won" our debate: that is why, in my opinion, we both won.
Overall, that is Jon's argument on the death penalty, and it is my way of remembering him... trying to spread his views on an issue he was extremely passionate about. Jon lived an amazing life, yes, a sadly short one, but if you were able to see his Facebook page, you would see just a glimpse of the amount of love created by a life that touched so many people, and who was, obviously, truly loved by many. He was just a good guy. And he helped me to see that I was wrong, which is, well, maybe the first step to being on the right path.
And as he always used to quote his favorite film "The Boondock Saints" (which he had this ridiculuous obsession with like he had with the Eagles)... Jon, buddy, "I'll see you on the flip side."
Love,
-Peyton
Below is a link to Jon Lucks' blog. I had not known Jon had a blog when he was alive, and am amazed now when I'm reading it for the first time. In fact, Jon's blog looks a lot like my blog: he is a huge advocate for both gay rights and against torture. The big difference I see is that Jon had a much more impressive vocabulary than me. :-) If you read his first few posts, you'll see that both his brain and his heart were in the right place. http://jonlucks.blogspot.com/
One of his memoriams can be found here: http://gwenglish.blogspot.com/2008/03/in-memoriam-jon-lucks.html
And his opinion on Ann Coulter here... I had to post this, Jon.
I miss you, Jon.
Friday, February 13, 2009
Why We Should Care
On Wednesday I saw the film "Taking Chance". This film is about taking the body of Chance Phelps, a private killed in the Iraq conflict, back to his family. The camera follows the actions of the body's escort (Kevin Bacon) along each stage of the journey: from the individuals who dressed the body to the ordinary Americans who gave salute through their respects and tears along the way.
I was sitting in the second row of the theater, but during the entire movie I heard the sniffling of tears and the crumbling of tissues. It was a muted orchestra of sadness: I, myself, couldn't help but to swell up with tears, and when I met up with my friend after the film, her eyes sparkled. To the left of me, in the theater, there was this "manly man", but he had that devastated contortion on his face. It brought to my mind this memory I have of being in church over a year ago, listening to a sermon mentioning our troops in Iraq, and the person directly in front of me breaking down crying. I had never seen anyone break down during a sermon, but at the mention of the Iraq war, and the troops over there, he couldn't take it, and it's one of those bittersweet memories for me.
If you read my blog often, you'll notice that I talk quite a bit about tears, sadness, and breakdowns. Whether it be my own, or someone else's, I talk about it because it interests me. Why do we care? What causes sadness? What does it mean? And, of course, my loyal readers will know that I think it's a visible expression of love. In my life, I have never been so involuntarily transformed as much as by breakdowns (yes, in terms of physical transformation they definitely "beat" panic attacks). So, although I didn't think "Taking Chance" was a great film, I appreciated it, because it emphasized the sacrifice of each man and woman who serves, and well, sometimes we need those tears, sometimes those tears are very important, sometimes we need to remember; always, we need to love.
On my friend Matt's blog, "Matt's Waste of Your Time" (a truly excellent blog), I have had this very frustrating debate with one of my high school friends. In short, my friend believes that it isn't important to care about why people would want to destroy America. Why someone, for example, would want to kill Private Chance. My friend only thinks it's important to care about who wants to destroy America, and then work towards destroying those people/groups. His words:
In the news recently, many of you may have seen that President Obama's first interview since taking office was with the Muslim world. Essentially, the President is taking the stance that words and ideals are a positive and effective way to reach out and build friendships with people and nations. I was overwhelmed with happiness when I saw this interview. Unlike my friend, I think extending a hand of friendship, reaching out through discussions of common values, and winning the battle of ideas is the only way to have a positive and lasting affect on this region. In the long term, guns will never work: only words, ideas, and values are binding and building. To see the video of the interview go here: video of interview
In response to Obama's interview, my friend posted this article: "Obama's Unnecessary Apology" by Charles Krauthammer http://www.realclearpolitics.com/articles/2009/01/us_respected_and_bled_for_musl.html as an argument as to why Obama's interview with the Muslim world was "unnecessary". In this article, Mr. Krauthammer brings up the following powerful memories: "43 Americans killed helping Somalia", "the Iran hostage crisis", "100s killed over cartoons" "innumerable embassies attacked", and "9/11". His argument is basically: 1) America is the greatest country in the world, and 2) why are we apologizing to these people. In my opinion, both Mr. Krauthammer and his article are filth. To put it bluntly: while I think love is at the core of sadness; I think reasoning like Mr. Krauthammer's, like my friend's, like even my parents', is at the core of what causes war.
Why did Mr. Krauthammer's article disgust me? Why do I think the author is a crook of the worst sort? I will point out that the Muslim world has "memories" of their own... Here are some of the facts on Iraq, Afghanistan, and Israel/Palestine:
Iraq:
As of August 14, 2008, an estimated 113,616 Iraqi civilians have been killed as a result of the Iraq conflict. Brookings Institute Estimates range from anywhere between 86,000 to over 1,000,000. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Casualties_of_the_Iraq_War
As of May 2007, 2,255,000 Iraqis have been displaced from their homes by the Iraq conflict. Another 2,000,000 are refugees in other countries. Iraq's population is only 26 million. http://usliberals.about.com/od/homelandsecurit1/a/IraqNumbers.htm http://www.cnn.com/2007/WORLD/meast/07/30/iraq.humanitarian/index.html
43 percent of Iraqis are in "absolute poverty".
It's estimated that 20,000 - 55,000 Iraqi insurgents have been killed by military action. http://www.usatoday.com/news/world/iraq/2007-09-26-insurgents_N.htm
The number of Americans soldiers killed: 4,242 http://www.cnn.com/SPECIALS/2003/iraq/forces/casualties/2009.02.html
Numbers in Afghanistan:
Direct civilian deaths in Afghanistan as a result of U.S. military action: 4,800 to 6,873 source
U.S. military deaths: 643 http://www.cnn.com/SPECIALS/2004/oef.casualties/
Numbers in Israel:
Since December 27, 2008
Palestinians dead: 1,380
Israelis dead: 9 http://www.ifamericansknew.org/stats/deaths.html
-------------------
When we look at the above numbers, I think we're obligated to at least question our actions, question what we stand for. These deaths not only raise the question: "why do people hate America?".... but, even a better question... "why shouldn't people hate America?" And answering that question, in my opinion, should be the core focus in our foreign policy. And despite these numbers, despite these deaths, I still think we can win on that answer.
On Matt's blog, my friend called me an "extremist". I am very thankful that I live in a society where I can post such "extremist" numbers, such honest facts, and be critical of our leaders and our actions. And, yes, I was crying in that theater over the death of Private Chance. Yes, I think that all of our service men and women, particularly those who have died or been wounded in battle, are American heroes, and should be honored a million times over. If we don't remember our soldiers then we are doing a true disservice to who we are and why we are allowed to live the way we live today. Men and women, like Private Chance, have given their lives so that we can all be free... so a guy like me can write a post like this... and I am sincerely grateful.
But I can also imagine the friends and family of those 100,000 plus civilians who have died in Iraq... and the millions more who have been displaced... I can feel their pain as well... I can put myself in their shoes, and understand why they are upset with America...
There was so much love in that theater watching "Taking Chance". Since it was a screening, I would guess that the man to the left of me, that many of the tissues being raised, were from people who knew soldiers who were killed in either Iraq or Afghanistan. And I feel great compassion for them. My friend, with her sparkly eyes and I, even we teared up, and I don't have a friend who was killed in the conflict; I don't have that always present, always flooding, personal connection. But if you can feel that amount of sadness, that amount of love, for an American killed in a conflict, why can't you feel that emotion for those civilians who have lost loved ones in conflict, to bombings, to starvation, in the Muslim world? If you can't fundamentally see why someone would want to kill Americans, I'm asking you why... why can't you see beyond the nation's borders? And in my opinion, the only way to stop someone from wanting to kill Americans, is convincing them that they shouldn't... because violence only leads to more violence... but ideas only lead to more ideas... as well as brotherhood.
My favorite quote from the film "Taking Chance" was: "You know, it's ironic, but I believe that if we had more people like Private Chance in this world, we wouldn't need a Marine Corps." For my part, I hope I will always fight for the love found within that theater Wednesday night. I hope I will always fight for love between Americans and people in the Middle East. And I hope I will always fight against the broad labels of "terrorists" and other stereotypes that are so loosely applied these days. I really believe that Mr. Krauthammer's article and the ideology associated with it: an ideology, in my opinion, that dehumanizes certain people in favor of promoting this false American ideal, is borderline criminal. In my opinion, people like him wouldn't think twice about going to war against Iran. When you ask me, what creates terrorists? Well, I don't think Mr. Krauthammer's ideology, and his use of love to promote a form of hate, is that far from the answer...
With just the mention of 9/11, it brings up so much emotion, so much pain... people like Mr. Krauthammer know that this emotion is very powerful. But we can use that emotion either 1) towards hate, or 2) towards love... and, unlike Mr. Krauthammer, I would argue we should choose the latter. And love begins with understanding someone else... like understanding the hopes and pains of people in the Middle East...
I know this was a rather long post, so thanks for reading it. :-)
-Peyton, the Pacifist Extremist ;-)
I was sitting in the second row of the theater, but during the entire movie I heard the sniffling of tears and the crumbling of tissues. It was a muted orchestra of sadness: I, myself, couldn't help but to swell up with tears, and when I met up with my friend after the film, her eyes sparkled. To the left of me, in the theater, there was this "manly man", but he had that devastated contortion on his face. It brought to my mind this memory I have of being in church over a year ago, listening to a sermon mentioning our troops in Iraq, and the person directly in front of me breaking down crying. I had never seen anyone break down during a sermon, but at the mention of the Iraq war, and the troops over there, he couldn't take it, and it's one of those bittersweet memories for me.
If you read my blog often, you'll notice that I talk quite a bit about tears, sadness, and breakdowns. Whether it be my own, or someone else's, I talk about it because it interests me. Why do we care? What causes sadness? What does it mean? And, of course, my loyal readers will know that I think it's a visible expression of love. In my life, I have never been so involuntarily transformed as much as by breakdowns (yes, in terms of physical transformation they definitely "beat" panic attacks). So, although I didn't think "Taking Chance" was a great film, I appreciated it, because it emphasized the sacrifice of each man and woman who serves, and well, sometimes we need those tears, sometimes those tears are very important, sometimes we need to remember; always, we need to love.
On my friend Matt's blog, "Matt's Waste of Your Time" (a truly excellent blog), I have had this very frustrating debate with one of my high school friends. In short, my friend believes that it isn't important to care about why people would want to destroy America. Why someone, for example, would want to kill Private Chance. My friend only thinks it's important to care about who wants to destroy America, and then work towards destroying those people/groups. His words:
We’re getting back to the argument about what “creates” terrorists, is it a cultural thing or a learned thing. I still think that if you grow up brainwashed into hating democracy and the West, you hate them no matter what... To me it’s a black and white issue, and maybe I’m over-simplifying it too much, but I think certain people are going to hate democracy and the West no matter what we do... I’m taking issue (again) with the argument that anything we do is more or less likely to have an effect on how “would be terrorists” feel about us.
In the news recently, many of you may have seen that President Obama's first interview since taking office was with the Muslim world. Essentially, the President is taking the stance that words and ideals are a positive and effective way to reach out and build friendships with people and nations. I was overwhelmed with happiness when I saw this interview. Unlike my friend, I think extending a hand of friendship, reaching out through discussions of common values, and winning the battle of ideas is the only way to have a positive and lasting affect on this region. In the long term, guns will never work: only words, ideas, and values are binding and building. To see the video of the interview go here: video of interview
In response to Obama's interview, my friend posted this article: "Obama's Unnecessary Apology" by Charles Krauthammer http://www.realclearpolitics.com/articles/2009/01/us_respected_and_bled_for_musl.html as an argument as to why Obama's interview with the Muslim world was "unnecessary". In this article, Mr. Krauthammer brings up the following powerful memories: "43 Americans killed helping Somalia", "the Iran hostage crisis", "100s killed over cartoons" "innumerable embassies attacked", and "9/11". His argument is basically: 1) America is the greatest country in the world, and 2) why are we apologizing to these people. In my opinion, both Mr. Krauthammer and his article are filth. To put it bluntly: while I think love is at the core of sadness; I think reasoning like Mr. Krauthammer's, like my friend's, like even my parents', is at the core of what causes war.
Why did Mr. Krauthammer's article disgust me? Why do I think the author is a crook of the worst sort? I will point out that the Muslim world has "memories" of their own... Here are some of the facts on Iraq, Afghanistan, and Israel/Palestine:
Iraq:
As of August 14, 2008, an estimated 113,616 Iraqi civilians have been killed as a result of the Iraq conflict. Brookings Institute Estimates range from anywhere between 86,000 to over 1,000,000. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Casualties_of_the_Iraq_War
As of May 2007, 2,255,000 Iraqis have been displaced from their homes by the Iraq conflict. Another 2,000,000 are refugees in other countries. Iraq's population is only 26 million. http://usliberals.about.com/od/homelandsecurit1/a/IraqNumbers.htm http://www.cnn.com/2007/WORLD/meast/07/30/iraq.humanitarian/index.html
43 percent of Iraqis are in "absolute poverty".
It's estimated that 20,000 - 55,000 Iraqi insurgents have been killed by military action. http://www.usatoday.com/news/world/iraq/2007-09-26-insurgents_N.htm
The number of Americans soldiers killed: 4,242 http://www.cnn.com/SPECIALS/2003/iraq/forces/casualties/2009.02.html
Numbers in Afghanistan:
Direct civilian deaths in Afghanistan as a result of U.S. military action: 4,800 to 6,873 source
U.S. military deaths: 643 http://www.cnn.com/SPECIALS/2004/oef.casualties/
Numbers in Israel:
Since December 27, 2008
Palestinians dead: 1,380
Israelis dead: 9 http://www.ifamericansknew.org/stats/deaths.html
-------------------
When we look at the above numbers, I think we're obligated to at least question our actions, question what we stand for. These deaths not only raise the question: "why do people hate America?".... but, even a better question... "why shouldn't people hate America?" And answering that question, in my opinion, should be the core focus in our foreign policy. And despite these numbers, despite these deaths, I still think we can win on that answer.
On Matt's blog, my friend called me an "extremist". I am very thankful that I live in a society where I can post such "extremist" numbers, such honest facts, and be critical of our leaders and our actions. And, yes, I was crying in that theater over the death of Private Chance. Yes, I think that all of our service men and women, particularly those who have died or been wounded in battle, are American heroes, and should be honored a million times over. If we don't remember our soldiers then we are doing a true disservice to who we are and why we are allowed to live the way we live today. Men and women, like Private Chance, have given their lives so that we can all be free... so a guy like me can write a post like this... and I am sincerely grateful.
But I can also imagine the friends and family of those 100,000 plus civilians who have died in Iraq... and the millions more who have been displaced... I can feel their pain as well... I can put myself in their shoes, and understand why they are upset with America...
There was so much love in that theater watching "Taking Chance". Since it was a screening, I would guess that the man to the left of me, that many of the tissues being raised, were from people who knew soldiers who were killed in either Iraq or Afghanistan. And I feel great compassion for them. My friend, with her sparkly eyes and I, even we teared up, and I don't have a friend who was killed in the conflict; I don't have that always present, always flooding, personal connection. But if you can feel that amount of sadness, that amount of love, for an American killed in a conflict, why can't you feel that emotion for those civilians who have lost loved ones in conflict, to bombings, to starvation, in the Muslim world? If you can't fundamentally see why someone would want to kill Americans, I'm asking you why... why can't you see beyond the nation's borders? And in my opinion, the only way to stop someone from wanting to kill Americans, is convincing them that they shouldn't... because violence only leads to more violence... but ideas only lead to more ideas... as well as brotherhood.
My favorite quote from the film "Taking Chance" was: "You know, it's ironic, but I believe that if we had more people like Private Chance in this world, we wouldn't need a Marine Corps." For my part, I hope I will always fight for the love found within that theater Wednesday night. I hope I will always fight for love between Americans and people in the Middle East. And I hope I will always fight against the broad labels of "terrorists" and other stereotypes that are so loosely applied these days. I really believe that Mr. Krauthammer's article and the ideology associated with it: an ideology, in my opinion, that dehumanizes certain people in favor of promoting this false American ideal, is borderline criminal. In my opinion, people like him wouldn't think twice about going to war against Iran. When you ask me, what creates terrorists? Well, I don't think Mr. Krauthammer's ideology, and his use of love to promote a form of hate, is that far from the answer...
With just the mention of 9/11, it brings up so much emotion, so much pain... people like Mr. Krauthammer know that this emotion is very powerful. But we can use that emotion either 1) towards hate, or 2) towards love... and, unlike Mr. Krauthammer, I would argue we should choose the latter. And love begins with understanding someone else... like understanding the hopes and pains of people in the Middle East...
I know this was a rather long post, so thanks for reading it. :-)
-Peyton, the Pacifist Extremist ;-)
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Hey you
Ok, so I know you read my blog
I just wanted to say thank you
For everything
You really did change my life
Before I met you, I was troubled
And ever since, I've become smaller and smaller
Just today, I felt beautiful peace
I wanted to let you know that I am
The happiest I've been in maybe my entire life
That I have true friends and new friends
And, of course, my sisters
And that's a whole lot
I am really sorry
For everything
I was selfish
I am emotional
This love thing gets me in a lot of trouble
I can't stop being emotional, and if I allowed me to
This poem could easily be 50 pages long
You know that
And, yeah, I'm not sure...
You know I'm not sure...
But love is everything to me
And I know that my emotion is dangerous
You told me my honesty is dangerous
But I can't be any other way
You know that
So, overall, I just wanted to let you know
That I don't blame you for anything
That you are one of the most important people in my life
That your influence on me changed my life
And that I just hope you don't feel negative emotions towards me
I really am sorry
I don't know a lot of things about me
I don't know a lot of things about life
But I know who I love
My body makes that painfully clear sometimes
And you are a true friend
Always.
Thank you
--------------
I was with my friend Cat at a film festival Sunday--- and we saw this documentary on the creator of "The Fishing School"--- it's an after-school support center for youth in DC. Anyway, the school's founder, Tom Lewis, brought up the story of Lazarus--- that Lazarus needed this huge stone removed from the cave before he could be free--- and Mr. Lewis asked, "who removed the stones in your life?" Well, obviously, you--- you removed the stone in my life. I can't thank you enough. I am who I am today, I am happy today, I feel freer than I have ever felt since maybe when I was very young, in huge part because you came into my life, you reintroduced me to the love I had tried to kill within me, you helped me to be open, to confront my fears, and well, every day when you look in the mirror, if you don't see a hero, you're not seeing what I feel.
Anyway, to be clear, I swear, although your influence is in much of my work, I won't write you into any of it. I just wanted to spread your message--- the message that saved my life--- namely that it shouldn't matter whether one's gay, straight, black, jew, christian, atheist, rich, poor, pakistani, illegal, palestinian, republican, popular, unpopular... whatever... it's love, stupid... it's always about love, stupid. Love everyone like a damn Robert Frost poem.... And I really believe that. So, yeah, the obsessive love thing is gone... it's gone...honestly, it's gone... but the emotion is still certainly there... it will always be there...and, honestly, I don't know because of that.
Well, I know you hate musicals and I know you don't like most similes... "like, who couldn't like a simile?"... but you know me... I like Sarah Brightman... and I'm a certifiable legume. Anyway, this song expresses a bit how I feel (even though you're not gonna like it-- but I'm hoping you're gonna like it!!!--- I really like it!!!). I don't know if this post was a good idea... hence the delay... but I just, you know, I don't want to cause more pain, but I just don't want you thinking that you are anything less than one of the greatest people ever... which is who you are to me...obviously... -P
I just wanted to say thank you
For everything
You really did change my life
Before I met you, I was troubled
And ever since, I've become smaller and smaller
Just today, I felt beautiful peace
I wanted to let you know that I am
The happiest I've been in maybe my entire life
That I have true friends and new friends
And, of course, my sisters
And that's a whole lot
I am really sorry
For everything
I was selfish
I am emotional
This love thing gets me in a lot of trouble
I can't stop being emotional, and if I allowed me to
This poem could easily be 50 pages long
You know that
And, yeah, I'm not sure...
You know I'm not sure...
But love is everything to me
And I know that my emotion is dangerous
You told me my honesty is dangerous
But I can't be any other way
You know that
So, overall, I just wanted to let you know
That I don't blame you for anything
That you are one of the most important people in my life
That your influence on me changed my life
And that I just hope you don't feel negative emotions towards me
I really am sorry
I don't know a lot of things about me
I don't know a lot of things about life
But I know who I love
My body makes that painfully clear sometimes
And you are a true friend
Always.
Thank you
--------------
I was with my friend Cat at a film festival Sunday--- and we saw this documentary on the creator of "The Fishing School"--- it's an after-school support center for youth in DC. Anyway, the school's founder, Tom Lewis, brought up the story of Lazarus--- that Lazarus needed this huge stone removed from the cave before he could be free--- and Mr. Lewis asked, "who removed the stones in your life?" Well, obviously, you--- you removed the stone in my life. I can't thank you enough. I am who I am today, I am happy today, I feel freer than I have ever felt since maybe when I was very young, in huge part because you came into my life, you reintroduced me to the love I had tried to kill within me, you helped me to be open, to confront my fears, and well, every day when you look in the mirror, if you don't see a hero, you're not seeing what I feel.
Anyway, to be clear, I swear, although your influence is in much of my work, I won't write you into any of it. I just wanted to spread your message--- the message that saved my life--- namely that it shouldn't matter whether one's gay, straight, black, jew, christian, atheist, rich, poor, pakistani, illegal, palestinian, republican, popular, unpopular... whatever... it's love, stupid... it's always about love, stupid. Love everyone like a damn Robert Frost poem.... And I really believe that. So, yeah, the obsessive love thing is gone... it's gone...honestly, it's gone... but the emotion is still certainly there... it will always be there...and, honestly, I don't know because of that.
Well, I know you hate musicals and I know you don't like most similes... "like, who couldn't like a simile?"... but you know me... I like Sarah Brightman... and I'm a certifiable legume. Anyway, this song expresses a bit how I feel (even though you're not gonna like it-- but I'm hoping you're gonna like it!!!--- I really like it!!!). I don't know if this post was a good idea... hence the delay... but I just, you know, I don't want to cause more pain, but I just don't want you thinking that you are anything less than one of the greatest people ever... which is who you are to me...obviously... -P
Sunday, February 8, 2009
In memory of Elena Ariano
Truth be told, I only met Elena once. But I think about her every night.
There are some people who leave a lasting impression of “good”. Some people who just are able to stir the biggest smiles and the warmest tears. Elena is one of those people.
I was with some of my high school friends when one of them told me about her passing. After only a few seconds to register the news, I couldn’t stop crying. I was a man in front of my male friends in the middle of a restaurant, and I just couldn’t stop. My face became swollen, my cheeks damply red, and my eyes were a mess of two broken shrubs in a swamp of bloodied sadness. I have never cried as much in public in my entire life as that night, in fact, that is the only time I have ever cried in front of friends--- and I cried those blood-red tears for hours. My friend, who told me, kept asking me “Are you ok? Are you ok?” Looking back on that night, I have never been so “ok” in my entire life; never been so proud to be so sad; never been so honored to feel and express such intense emotion for such a wonderful person.
I have thought quite a bit about why I suffered an emotional breakdown when I learned of Elena’s passing, and why I have thought about her every night in my prayers since. True, I only met her once: she joined us at a little Halloween get-together in my apartment in DC, and besides becoming friends on Facebook, we never spoke after that. I have considered if my emotion was caused because I had a little “crush” on Elena, and yeah, admittedly, I thought she was beautiful. Obviously, she is beautiful.
But the biggest reason, I believe, is that although I only knew Elena for several hours on a Halloween day, I loved Elena. I love Elena. Because she was so funny, so interested in others, so kind, so smiling, so inquisitive, so sweetly dorky, so beautiful, so fun; such an amazing, laughing, dancing, thoughtful, great person… that I couldn’t handle the world losing such a wonderful person so quickly. I think the reason I was so sad, why I am getting so sad even writing this note, is that I was shocked about how Elena, a person who was the definition of “full of life”, the definition of love and happiness and fun, could have possibly been taken from this Earth only a few months after I met her. If there was anyone who embraced life, it was her… if there was any person who was made to make others happy, to enjoy life, to be the friend who was always caring and cared for--- it was her. Elena is special. Even after only knowing her briefly, it was obvious. And I just couldn’t believe that Elena, one of those special people, with one of the greatest smiles that ever existed, how that same Elena could possibly pass away… it seems truly unfair.
I know I may not be the best person to write a testimonial about Elena, because I didn’t know her that well. We had talked about meeting up in Connecticut for the holidays, and the fact that I never got in touch with her; well, it’s one of my true regrets. However, this much I can say: Elena treated me with kindness, with warmth, with a degree of goodness that has made her one of those touching and warm memories…that makes me thank God every night in my prayers, and compels these warm tears that are so beautiful. I just always have to thank God for having had the pleasure to know her, and sometimes, I even ask Elena for help, because, well, I know she’s that sort of soul. I only knew her for a few hours, but I assure you, she will remain in my head and in my heart as long as I’m alive. I know that sounds crazy, but it’s wonderfully true.
I have met all sorts of people in my life. And I tend to have optimism, I tend to think people are good at their cores, but Elena was one of the people who I knew, without a doubt, was filled with goodness. I couldn’t imagine Elena doing anything bad, because she was that kind, that caring, that warm person, who just with ease was able to bring a tremendous amount of joy to both me and my friends. In just one day, Elena made a difference in my life, and her memory, her spirit, whatever one would call it, continues to make a difference every day. Thanks Elena.
Love,
Peyton
Saturday, February 7, 2009
The Best Seat in the House
On Friday Night, I went to go see the Alvin Ailey dance company at the Kennedy Center. My seat was Second Tier, Seat A-18, the cheapest seat in the house: first row, but the farthest seat to the left. I had bought this ticket, because I had bought tickets to see the New York City Ballet in March, and well, if you know me, I always ask people for advice--- when I go to a restaurant I usually ask the waiter or waitress what they would get, and then just get that. Well, the ticket guy told me that I "had" to go see the Alvin Ailey dance company--- so I got the last cheap seat that they had available.
Boy, did I not regret that choice!!! As it turned out, the Obama family also went to go see the Alvin Ailey dance company Friday night, and my cheap seat turned out to be the best seat in the house!!! For those that know the Kennedy Center, the second tier of the opera house swings around like a half ellipse, so the entire night I had one of the best views in the house of the presidential box!!! Obama, Michelle, and kids were sitting in the Presidential box (center), to his right (my left) were the Attorney General and his family, and to his right, Mayor Fenty and his family.
On top of this up-close look at the president, the show was great... the physical beauty and talent of the performers was amazing. Yeah, admittedly, they made some mistakes, and some pieces were better than others, but some of the pieces were excellent... the form, the leg strength, the way they can stretch their legs perfectly out with humanity-defying balance, yeah, it was beyond cool. It just was amazing the physical and technical form, the energy, the genetics, the practice, the synchronism... all of what went into that performance, reminded me how lucky I am to be able to view it. Plus, I got to sit next to this nice couple who chatted with me much of the night :-). They, too, were excited about Obama, but we were all pretty laid back compared to all of the screaming people down in the orchestra section below ;-).
As for the Presidential family, I must say, the kids look to be real kids. Sasha and Malia actually played and fooled around with each other as kids should do, and one actually sat on Michelle's lap for a bit of the intermission. The family looks to be a real loving family--- at this point, there's no reason to fake this--- and well, I was happy to see that they were seemingly very happy and loving towards each other. It was really, very nice. The President sat on the left (my right), Michelle to his right, and the kids immediately to the right of Michelle.
Overall, the night was wonderful. Unfortunately, I have never been around a worse behaved crowd at the Kennedy Center--- flash photography was a constant during the performance, and it was really funny to see the whole orchestra section crammed into the front of the house to get a look at the president, and then scramble back once the lights were turned off for the show. The president, as you might expect, was given huge ovations at the beginning and at the end of each intermission, and, at the end, the show deservedly earned a standing ovation from both the crowd and the president. I was told that Sasha and Malia went to the Wednesday evening show of the Alvin Ailey dance company--- and likely dragged their parents to see the Friday night show (which was the same program). ;-)
Unfortunately, I didn't have my camera with me, but to see the president up-close, especially in a non-formal setting, was really quite cool. But yeah, the biggest impression of the night, was that the president is definitely the biggest celebrity in America--- for better or worse. The crowd was crazy for him. -P
Boy, did I not regret that choice!!! As it turned out, the Obama family also went to go see the Alvin Ailey dance company Friday night, and my cheap seat turned out to be the best seat in the house!!! For those that know the Kennedy Center, the second tier of the opera house swings around like a half ellipse, so the entire night I had one of the best views in the house of the presidential box!!! Obama, Michelle, and kids were sitting in the Presidential box (center), to his right (my left) were the Attorney General and his family, and to his right, Mayor Fenty and his family.
On top of this up-close look at the president, the show was great... the physical beauty and talent of the performers was amazing. Yeah, admittedly, they made some mistakes, and some pieces were better than others, but some of the pieces were excellent... the form, the leg strength, the way they can stretch their legs perfectly out with humanity-defying balance, yeah, it was beyond cool. It just was amazing the physical and technical form, the energy, the genetics, the practice, the synchronism... all of what went into that performance, reminded me how lucky I am to be able to view it. Plus, I got to sit next to this nice couple who chatted with me much of the night :-). They, too, were excited about Obama, but we were all pretty laid back compared to all of the screaming people down in the orchestra section below ;-).
As for the Presidential family, I must say, the kids look to be real kids. Sasha and Malia actually played and fooled around with each other as kids should do, and one actually sat on Michelle's lap for a bit of the intermission. The family looks to be a real loving family--- at this point, there's no reason to fake this--- and well, I was happy to see that they were seemingly very happy and loving towards each other. It was really, very nice. The President sat on the left (my right), Michelle to his right, and the kids immediately to the right of Michelle.
Overall, the night was wonderful. Unfortunately, I have never been around a worse behaved crowd at the Kennedy Center--- flash photography was a constant during the performance, and it was really funny to see the whole orchestra section crammed into the front of the house to get a look at the president, and then scramble back once the lights were turned off for the show. The president, as you might expect, was given huge ovations at the beginning and at the end of each intermission, and, at the end, the show deservedly earned a standing ovation from both the crowd and the president. I was told that Sasha and Malia went to the Wednesday evening show of the Alvin Ailey dance company--- and likely dragged their parents to see the Friday night show (which was the same program). ;-)
Unfortunately, I didn't have my camera with me, but to see the president up-close, especially in a non-formal setting, was really quite cool. But yeah, the biggest impression of the night, was that the president is definitely the biggest celebrity in America--- for better or worse. The crowd was crazy for him. -P
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